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Record: 8 days. Desperately need a new outlook. Please please help!

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Bobberz, Aug 23, 2017.

  1. Bobberz

    Bobberz Fapstronaut

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    So firstly, recently I've been getting to this porn game on a website called nutaku. Playing it usually always results in me relapsing. This does in fact count as porn and I'm seriously looking to get rid of it. How am I supposed to do this? This is in fact a lot harder than abstaining porn videos because I tend to get attracted to the game mechanics itself, however, exposing me to the porn which leads to relapses. Am I allowed to play this? Should I maybe take a gap in playing it? Or should I go cold-turkey? I'm prepared to do anything you have to say to help rid this addiction most efficiently.

    Secondly, I have a heck ton of work to complete. I'm in 12th grade! I always get stressed out about my work and I'm ashamed to say that it's because I just procrastinate it to watch porn and masturbate. If I didn't, I'd have enough time to do all my work twice or maybe even thrice! This impacts my education seriously. I seriously want some input as to how you deal with this in the right manner.

    Thirdly, I have free time. A lot of it. This usually leads me to getting bored and going to porn sites to fill the void in me. See, when I usually come home from school, I'm determined that I will practice programming (my hobby). But after I come home, I feel a little lazy, go to some games, get bored, and go to some porn telling myself it's just for a bit and one thing leads to another and relapsseedddd.

    Fourthly, even after dealing with all this, I'm pretty sure I'll start to get fantasies if I watch regular movies with attractive people because that does happen now. This is very annoying and I want it to stop. I want to watch a movie like a regular person and have regular enjoyment. What do I do?

    So I feel that every singe one of these contribute to my relapses. This is my current life. My record is a measly 8 days and I'm determined to break free of this goddamn inhumane addiction.

    Go NoFap!
     
  2. Septimus

    Septimus Fapstronaut

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    Plan all your time, especially your "off" time. That doesn't mean it all has to be work or studying. Plan for what fun things you are going to do...

    But plan things that meet the following criteria:

    1. You really enjoy.
    2. Are uplifting and ennobling.

    Also, think about how you might make a difference in others' lives. Maybe it means volunteering for something, or helping a neighbor or a friend. When we help others, when we make a difference, that helps fulfill that part of us that wants to give life, and it's deeply satisfying.
     
    Bobberz and Riddle22 like this.
  3. Riddle22

    Riddle22 Fapstronaut

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    perhaps you can spend your time on outdoor such hiking, read a book on library, going to church when sunday or if you like spend your time in your house you could do something like helps your parent, example help your mom on kitchen prepare food, etc. but for me the most effective things to stop my addiction to porn and masturbate are spend my time on outdoor when i can interact with nature.
     
    Bobberz likes this.
  4. Bobberz

    Bobberz Fapstronaut

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    So I just found the courage to delete my account from that horrid porn game website. Shouldn't be a problem anymore.

    See, now if I stop PMOing at a whole, I face withdrawal. My prefrontal cortex shuts down and my limbic system drives me nuts. I feel I need to deal with this before finding things to replace the time I spend PMOing. I mean, I always plan my day to do stuff like program, play music, study, etc but I keep procrastinating them to somehow get relieved of that desire. How should I deal with this?

    This does make a lot of sense. I will definitely try this. But just a minute problem. I'm an awkward person. My emotions are very unbalanced and simply immature. I feel before taking up real responsibilities and helping others, I should make sure to deal with this first so I don't cause trouble to others. I wouldn't want to take up a job that I will mess up due to my emotional problems. It's the main reason I'm desperate for a reboot.

    Thank you for your great response, it has a lot of great points but I just had a few extra questions to ask if you don't mind :)
     
  5. Chris Jackson

    Chris Jackson Fapstronaut

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    I went through the same bud, I used to procrastinate get bored and then watch porn, and then I would sit there with no energy and procrastinate even more. I had it bad, what I done was this I got out of the house and around people. I went to the library. I went to the park. I joined a football team. The way I done this was I convinced myself it would lead to me getting a hot girl in the future. No girl wants a hermit.
     
    Bobberz likes this.
  6. You have time your just wasting it. Like @Septimus siad, plan your day. You've got to get in the habit of following your schedule. When you come home from school, don't immediately get in the computer. Do something active like exercise, walking, push-ups. Preferably outside. Take care of any chores or other responsibilities you have next. This helps get your brain into task-oriented mode. Then you can start doing your homework or coding. Coding is a great tool to keep your mind occupied but deist the temptation to surf which will lead you to possibly relapsing. Boredom/procrastination seems to be your enemy and one reason you PMO. Have a strategy in place to deal with it and recognize it when's it's happening.
     
    Bobberz likes this.
  7. Septimus

    Septimus Fapstronaut

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    I think it comes down to how badly you truly want this. If I am walking to the mailbox, I don't need a lot of motivation. But I need a pretty intense motivation if I'm going to climb a mountain.

    No one can supply that motivation for you. For me, it was a combination of things. I believe my porn and masturbation habits were deeply sinful and separated me from God. And I believe they were damaging me in many ways. And that they were a terrible risk, because if discovered, my life would be shipwrecked. And that it was empty and leading me nowhere. And I also reflected on just how deeply unhappy, how terrible, they made me feel. How much I did not respect myself.

    There's more I could say, but you get the idea. Those are some of what motivated ME.

    Also, I believe nothing good happens without God's help, so I prayed and prayed and prayed. I'd been praying for YEARS for help. Then I found this site, and I found other things, and I guess that answered my prayers. So now, my motivation is also, I don't want to lose the freedom that I've gained. I put it at risk this year, and it's been a chore just to get 31 days of freedom.

    I will pray for you, but again, you have to find the motivation in your own way. If you want it bad enough that you will chew nails...you'll be off to a great start.
     
    Bobberz likes this.
  8. Bobberz

    Bobberz Fapstronaut

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    All of you are telling me to fill the time with physical activity. Or any outdoor activity. So that's what I'll do. Thank you all!

    Library, park, football, they're all amazing ideas man. Thanks very much. Also, the hot girl part just gave me a boost in motivation to do this. Your logic is undeniable.

    Riiighttt, until now, I've always plopped myself behind the computer as soon as I came home. I guess that's wrong. I'll consider doing outside work after I come home. The task-oriented mode is something I hadn't considered. So I guess by completing routine tasks, my brain gets accustomed to the tasks, and doesn't need PMO since there's no more gaps to fill.

    Thank you very very much for this. I see how you got a majority of your motivation from God and that's truly inspiring. However, I'm an atheist, so as you said, I guess I myself need to find the things that motivate me. One is, like what @Chris Jackson, getting a girl and I'm sure I have many more. Thank you for showing me this idea. I truly appreciate it.
     
    Chris Jackson likes this.
  9. Chris Jackson

    Chris Jackson Fapstronaut

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    I'm glad I could be of help @Bobberz What I loved the most was going to the gym. I would workout and get to see hot girls who weren't behind a screen. That was the added benefit for me, getting a chance to see some hotties even talking to some. I built a good body socialized with a lot of people and even had a few girls give me their numbers. I'm serious.

    and another good thing, it helps with erectile dysfunction.
     

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