People who relapsed after a longtime

One time I was on a 83 day streak then I relapsed after that, I struggled for a year and now I'm on this streak.

 

First time I tried NoFap, i went to 70 days and then relapsed coz of my own foolishness. Couldn't get on with the streak for the next 20 days because it was really hard. Now I am on 23 days but still, its harder than the first time. Even with the benefits I must say I sometimes do feel like going for another relapse. Hopefully this time I go more than 70.

 

When you relapse after a long period of time you are even more vulnerable.
Because you kinda forget how shitty this addiction is and that few seconds of pleasure are not worth it.
Watching porn feels amazing and everything is the best!!! Until you wake up...


13 months ago I have relapsed after 45 Days streak and I am struggling ever since. Sure, I had some success after that but never as close to 45 Days.
A month ago I ended my not using porn streak of 72 Days because I have realized I am not addicted to porn, but masturbation.

 

Relapsed after 8 months of NoFap and now I've officially said farewell to Porn. Not going back to that bullshit again. I'm tired of that shit.

 

I M to O one time today after 38 days. No P though. Still feel a ton of shame and I feel how it has thrown my composure and brain chemistry into disarray. Nothing tragic, or huge, but it's as if the brain got a taste of its old medicine and now it's just pulling hard to go there back again instead of rewiring.

I guess I have to come to terms with the idea that even M, which is not an unhealthy activity in and of itself, is off the table for me for good. Just like an alcoholic can't have one beer, I can't just jerk off once a month, or once every 40 days.

 

Up until recently I could avoid P for between a few months to 2 years, but I couldn't stop MO for more than a few weeks at most. I stopped PMO for 17 weeks once in 2011 and relapsed by playing adult flash games (how childish, I know). But I kept trying and eventually broke that record too.
Now I have almost 3 years no MO