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Help/advice needed

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by BrandoCommando, Jan 5, 2018.

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  1. Jan 5, 2018 #1
    BrandoCommando

    BrandoCommando New Fapstronaut

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    I tried to write a post earlier but was kicked off line...So I'm going to make this as short as possible.

    I masturbate alot, of course, less than when I was younger but more than most people I think. Like many here I think it's fair to say I'm addicted to porn. Even when I have girlfriends I still watch porn. For the past 2 years however my life has changed dramatically as I have been single and sober due to being deployed, which I am currently still deployed. This extended period of being single has led to more and more porn which has become more and more "abnormal"- as in it is very different from sex I would have in real life. As a result I have been watching a mix of gay, straight, bi, transwoman, bdsm, and other kink or taboo porn. I don't find myself actually attracted to any of it so much as I just need to see something new. Something other than crappy storyline>oral sex> fake moaning> sex> moneyshot>the end. I see this being a problem because it doesn't align with my actual desires and the longer I'm out here the more frequent this style of porn and thoughts come to me. I now think about sex/porn constantly and its aggravating. I feel that I need to stop watching porn and stop masturbating but I'm afraid if I do the thoughts will only become stronger and more intrusive. I want to "get a grip" on my life and take back control, but the longer I'm sober and the more I contemplate back on my life I don't think I have ever had control of this situation. As a result I have had ED, body image issues, self-esteem issues, numerous-nameless-faceless-sexual encounters including a few I didn't want to happen, but did anyways because I wanted to feel a certain "slutty" kind of way. I guess what I'm getting at is, I see alot of ppl here who have this similar addiction, but where do I go from here?
     
    BrandoCommando, Jan 5, 2018
    BrandoCommando, Jan 5, 2018
    #1
  2. Jan 5, 2018 #2
    J4220

    J4220 Fapstronaut

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    The opposite will most likely happen if you stop looking at porn and masturbating.
     
    J4220, Jan 5, 2018
    J4220, Jan 5, 2018
    #2
    BrandoCommando likes this.
  3. Jan 5, 2018 #3
    Protagoras

    Protagoras Fapstronaut

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    Welcome. HERE are some things helping me
     
    Protagoras, Jan 5, 2018
    Protagoras, Jan 5, 2018
    #3
    BrandoCommando likes this.
  4. Jan 6, 2018 #4
    D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

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    Welcome to NoFap where you are amongst friends who are here to encourage you and sometimes challenge you but not judge you.

    The enemy is here to steal, kill and destroy. What are your current strategies for combating the enemy called PMO?
     
    D . J ., Jan 6, 2018
    D . J ., Jan 6, 2018
    #4
  5. Jan 6, 2018 #5
    Roady

    Roady Fapstronaut
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    Hi
    Glad you are here. And very welcome to join us in our journey to a healthy, fulfilling life without any self harming habits.

    It's a safe place here. We all are in the same boat, so there is no single space for judgement here.
    Maybe it's a good idea to keep a journal. Sharing your struggles, thoughts and feelings may help you to understand the underlying issues.

    Keep coming back and get the most effort out of nofap!
    You don't need to do it alone!

    Let's go to work!
     
    Roady, Jan 6, 2018
    Roady, Jan 6, 2018
    #5
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  6. Jan 7, 2018 #6
    BrandoCommando

    BrandoCommando New Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the replies yall. I went one day without, then cracked the next day. Couldn't fall asleep until I masturbated. I know this takes time and plenty of steps and thanks for the advice Protagoras I guess I'll keep coming back and continue trying to figure it out.
     
    BrandoCommando, Jan 7, 2018
    BrandoCommando, Jan 7, 2018
    #6
  7. Jan 7, 2018 #7
    D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

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    D . J ., Jan 7, 2018
    D . J ., Jan 7, 2018
    #7
  8. Jan 8, 2018 #8
    Roady

    Roady Fapstronaut
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    Next time try to write down your thoughts and feelings when you can't sleep.
    That has saved lot of night sleeps for me, without masturbating. Because, that's just not an opportunity any more for me.
     
    Roady, Jan 8, 2018
    Roady, Jan 8, 2018
    #8
  9. Jan 9, 2018 #9
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    One of the ways I got involved with the fellowship was by reading some really great journals.

    I've included journals from all age groups, spiritual members, religious members, secular members, male and female. You should find journals that help. If not, look around, there are hundreds of others from which to choose. When I say "it works if you work it", reading journals is part of that work.

    Once you open a journal, click "Watch Thread" in the upper right of the page to get alerts when new posts are made. Here are just a few:

    @2525 Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/147264/
    ---
    @Visor Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/144228/
    ---
    @Dragonnlife Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/136148
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    @weddingnails Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/143418/
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    @Struggle Bug Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/141911/
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    @BigDawg913 Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/145872/
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    @Sunshadow Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/75108/
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    @kropo82 Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/78164/
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    @tet2vd Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/144513
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    @Protagoras Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/109842/
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    @Tomoya Okazaki Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/143534/
    ---

    There are many more, and you can discover them on your own. But, these are great places to start.

    This is a work in progress. So, if a journal has changed or is no longer active, look around there are some amazing journals on here.

    - L
     
    Deleted Account, Jan 9, 2018
    Deleted Account, Jan 9, 2018
    #9

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