Fantasies about my crush, trigger or not?

If by trigger a thought tempting you to your old ways then yes it is a trigger. The simplest way I can put it about what I do about my “triggers” is recognize them for what they really are; they are thoughts and I have found that subduing my thoughts has helped to seize the impure ones. Most importantly, be on guard.

But in my opinion, you haven’t done anything wrong. I can go on about why you aren’t.

 

I got this reference from a book I just read. You can see NoFap as a frozen pond. Relapsing is the water under the ice, the ice is your willpower, and stones are in this example sexual triggers. If you put a stone on the ice, the tention increases, and if there are too many stones, your willpower gives up and you end up relapsing. I think you can compare this situation with a pebble, but if you keep thinking about her, the tention will build up over time and might, combined with other triggers, end up with in a relapse.

 

Exactly Wombo, build your nofap upon solid ground such as rock and not sand.

 

It may not trigger sexual, physical masturbation, but it is effectively emotional, psychological masturbation.

In another thread this came up as a part of a reply I posted. When I look back a times when I've been really into someone, objectively I have to say a kind of objectification did happen, an OCD idealization when it could be VERY far from the truth. Just because it is a psychological fantasy and therefore not really the focus for this community it doesn't necessarily mean it is a good thing.

Of course the fact that you are posting about it says you are aware and I don't expect it to be an issue for you necessarily, but I feel it's good to be aware of this. Many might say this kind of fantasizing is harmless and I have had that in the past when I was younger, like even just imagining grocery shopping with a girl, but it is ultimately just that - fantasy.

 

It is a trigger that can lead to a potential relapse, but what is more important is how you manage it.
I sometimes have fantasies also about real girls, I just warn myself and tell me that I'd better to move to other thoughts.

But it is nothing to feel guilt about

 

Yes. Fantasizing is a no-no for me.

 

you do not know this woman. You have no kind of human interaction with this woman so you are pornographizing her none the less. You separate sexuality and relationship from real life and let it live in fantasy and premasturbatory getting turned on.

It separates you from doing the work it takes to face life and develop human relations with a woman and probably with male friends and probbly the most strongly from accepting that you are a good and worthy person who deserves a real love friendship and sexual relationship''

stop this cyber stalking of this woman and talk to a real person in person!

 

Fantasizing is bad for reboot, it keeps feeding the addiction. More you fantasize, more it leads you to get support to relapse on. Fantasizing brings the urges, it always comes first so it's hard to prevent on sight.

The best way to fight back is to constantly try to forget this girl you're obsessed with, especially if there is nothing concrete between you and her. Loop your serious reasons to stop this madness in your head.

 

As soon as I do that I realize I'm not in the present moment and try to think about something else built there is no guilt but it's happening even more now at the gym I think my libido is gong up ever since my current streak almost a year now

 

Fantacizing is exercising the same chemical and mental reflexes that you are trying to escape by rebooting. Detox, clean up, destroy them, assess where you need to grow to fill the space that porn left

You are not trying to find a cleaner more social acceptble way to pornographize your sex or other people, YOU NEED TO GROW

 

Well, it seems to me like you are building a connection with a real person and want her to be a part of your life. Ain't nothing wrong with that!! It's ok to think about real women. They are beautiful!!

Instead of focusing on your fantasies and feeling guilty, accept them as a natural reaction to a fulfilling relationship. Just become the best version of yourself that you can be and be confident in your actions/decisions. Women love that!

Then maybe she'll start to fantasize about you

 

Use this "trigger" to your advantage!!! Go talk to her!!! Put in the work to get the reward (the real reward)

 

Yes!! This is what you gotta do! Great advice

 

lol I love this forum keeps me grounded I deleted my dating apps and I know why I keep going back to them when I feel lonely or the morning after a late night drinking binge so I'm more aware now

 

Don't practice what you don't want to become.

Be aware that many dudes here are essentially practicing becoming monks by eliminating all sexual thoughts, period.
If you want to go that route, then that's the way you should regard your fantasies.
If you want to be a normal functioning human being, on the other hand...