90 Days NOPMO - 3 Keys for success

Yow everyone I made it to day 90! I didn't have any struggles and it I feel pretty good.

Here 3 things that have helped me:

1. Focus on what you want:
   In the past I found myself struggeling a lot with the urge, now days it is still there but passing the urge goes without any fight or struggle. What has helped me the most for dealing with the urge was to ask myself this question: "Why do I want to stay on nofap?"
   
   When you answer this question for yourself you start convincing yourself that where you are is much better than where fapping leads. This will make it easy for to overwin it because you see that place where you are as something better than fapping. Remember our brain is always searching for the most pleasure and the least amount of pain. Use that to craft your life.
   
   
2. The relationship with yourself:
   This may sound strange but I sometimes talk to myself. I have found that I can be my own mentor/psychologist when I talk to myself. You don't have to be the strange guy who always talks to himself you can do it with a diary.
   
   Why does this help?
   
   It helps to get intouch with yourself. Sometimes we are afraid or stressed or angry and we don't know why. The basic reaction of someone who is addicted is to run away from painful emotions. But when you get intouch with these emotions you learn so much more about yourself.
   
   You basically get a better relationship with yourself. You care for yourself, you start loving yourself. Some of you may hate yourself, this is a bad place to start. If you hate yourself, you will never get recovered. YOU NEED TO GET INTOUCH.
   
   Respect your emotions, respect your insecurities, be nice to yourself, have a party for yourself when you succeed, follow your good desires, go after your dreams, have compassion for yourself.
   
   Here are a few suggestions to get in intouch with yourself: Meditation (to become aware), affirmations, talking to yourself, writing a diary, writing down who you want to become, listening to your dreams & good desires, felicitating yourself when you do something good. (drop your suggestions below)
   
   (A few recommended reads: You can heal your life - The subtle art of not giving a f*c - Radical Honesty - Letting go - The gift of imperfection - Verslaafd and liefde)
   
   The relationship with yourself is also important when you relapse, when you relapse it is important that you be nice to yourself. You got to see that you have a new chance to start again and that chance is RIGHT NOW!
   
   
3. Know where you want to go:
   Knowing where you want to go in life is key and I recommend you to search for it right now or after this post.
   
   This is key because you will feel that you have a purpose to work on. You will have a mission in this life. It will give your life meaning, your confidence will get better and you will feel awesome everyday. Not because you can show to people what you have accomplished. No, because you know that this is your project and this is your life. And you are shaping it in the way you want to make it.
   
   Thinking about what you want in life is very important. Get clear on this and make up goals.
   
   Here are a few questions to get you started:
   "What do I want to have accomplished on my death bed?"
   "What do I to have done in 5 years?"
   "What do I always want to have done since I was a kid?"
   "The answers I just got, how can I change those into actionable actions?"
   
   You have to remember that your time on this planet is limited. So use your time well, craft your own purpose, go after it and make your life worthwhile, every day.

If you get these 3 things right you will be of a lot better than before. There are more techniques for this battle with yourself but lets start here.

See you soon at +90 days!
Thomas

(Btw counter will be at 90 days in about 6 hours)

 

Thank you!

 

Amazing words, how do u write like a pro?

 

Let me know what worked for you. And thanks I will try to make a new one soon

Thank you!

Thanks brother, good luck to you too!

 

O

Broo this is one of the best tips Man thnxxx brooo for thisss.....It will.help in our journey

 

1. I don't think there is a formula for it. It is different for everybody, just try it and feel it. Feel when you are ready, and when you are ready you decide what you want to do and what not.

2. More wet dreams, more intense emotions positive and negative.

3. I think that in the beginning your libido will go up and down. It will get more balanced overtime.

4. What do you mean with embarassing episode?

5. You can decide for yourself what you want. Always decide what is best for you. I like to set new goals.

6. Just say to the girl that you haven't had sex or fapped. They will understand it, and there is always a round two.

Keep it up brother!

 

I cannot give you much advice because I don't know your story.
But one thing in nofap is important: awareness. Being aware of yourself and how you work. Developing this will help you understand the process behind your addiction.

Here are a few questions to help you start:

1. When do you get cravings?
2. What triggered it?
3. How did you feel when you got it?
4. What don't you want to feel when you get cravings?

Good luck brother!