1 month report.

Hi Everyone!
I would like to write a bit about my journey so far, I am now 1 month in without PMO. I will start with some background about myself and my situation, then mention some clear benefits so far, and end with thoughts and questions regarding my expectations from this reboot. Would also appreciate some feedback or thoughts from you to help me progress even further.

Background
In the very beginning of this year, I suffered from several panic attacks after a heavy party trip to balticum. In that moment I thought I was going to die pretty much (the worst experience in my life so far). During the time I deep inside me knew I was going towards the wrong path in my life, since I dealt with my mom´s death with party drugs and smooking weed everyday. The time I had my panic attacks, I got scared AF and made 2 promises to myself:

1. I will do everything in my own power to get back normal again
2. I will do everything in my own power to never put myself in that terrific position again.

So basically I draw the conclusion that drugs was the only thing that contributed to my poor mental health. So I quit everything related to that. No weed, no party drugs, not even alcohol. (sober for 6 months today!) I basically went through a revolutionary change in my lifestyle to get my act together. But, I worked my ass off in school, training, healthy lifestyle etc. for several months, completely ignoring my problem of PMO. And in may I still felt a bit shit, and faced this problem. That they I was crying and wrote myself a contract that there is no more PMO for 90 days, after that I will start a healthy mastrubation lifestyle (without porn).

Some benefits after 1 month:

• Average girls look pretty good now ;P
• I start to look forward to things in my future
• I am more social and so much more confident in my conversaitons
• I can look people in their eyes without problem
• I laugh again to stuff
• Overall more gratification in my daily life

Thoughts & questions:
I can get some cravings, but I don´t think they are too difficult to fight against. (I actually have a lot of will power to make this work out). And also there are some days I feel like my sexuality is completely gone, and then think that "today maybe my flatline phase start) but then a couple of days after I get cravings again, which makes me a bit confussed. Also I still believe the worst part is still to come since I don´t yet think it has been too difficult.

My biggest concern or thought is that I don´t really have a solid plan how to make a sustainable long-term plan after day 90. Mastrubate once a week without porn etc?, would appreciate some advice regarding this. Also, the only thing I am very scared of right now will be the first time with a girl, any other have any experience with that they would like to share?

Other than that I can conclude that NoFap is a movement I do believe is doing something very good for the world. My own journey is indeed challenging, but I did not expect it to be easy. I wish everyone best luck withe everything.

Cheers,

 

thanks everybody

 

Good question, I do believe there might be several factors. Since I now interact in social convesations and actually do want to talk to people, I do also find funny things funny, if it makes sense? Before I was just tryin to end a conversation ASAP, because I found no value to small talking.

 

Thanks, I have to admit that now last couple of days I have been "fantasizing" a lot during work when I am bored. I had not much trouble with that before but now I do! I also find it difficult to read NoFap at office since we have open office xD

 

I understand the benefits with that! But, what about your self-control when it comes to be with a partner? My first thought was that the ideal habit would be M once a week or something? Ofc if I would have a gf it be a different situation.

 

Thanks everyone for your support! It means a lot.
A small update on day 49: I have started to struggle with fantazising during boring times. Also, I am very committed to make it to day 90, my will-power is that strong. What happens after that? So much information encourage us to do 90 days to reboot and rewire and to break porn habits etc. But very little information about a maintainance phase.