Seven days, now what?

Now what? Day 8!

Don't spend too much time alone. You are already on the right track there. If you feel the urges are too much, GET OUT! Go be around other people.

 

Don't look at days the way that you do. Its not a matter of "14 days would be awesome" its about today, the current moment, the current urge. It doesn't matter if you've been clean for 7 days or 7 weeks, all that matters is not fucking up today.

Keep that mentality everyday. That the only thing that matters in a given day is to not fuck up. The past and future have no influence on it all that matters is now.

Counting days or looking at streaks does nothing but bad in my opinion. Its the biggest downfall of people tryina get clean.

It can lead to what you're doing right now where you ask the question of "What now" because a part of your mind probably feels like "I made it to my goal, now I can PMO" or something to that effect.

But much worse is that it very commonly leads to people not even making it a week because either consciously or subconsciously they have the mentality of "Im only a few days in, a relapse now isn't a big deal. I'll just do that and have a fresh start" or similar things to that. Main point being that they feel like relapse in that moment isn't a big deal or "this will be the last time, then I'll stop" things like that which keeps them trapped in a cycle.

[☡2023 edit: This is the most important part]
It's also (sadly) very common for it to completely destroy someone who was doing really well. They stay clean for a long stretch of time and then have a slip up and reset the counter to 0. At that point they feel horribly demoralized because they have the mentality of "Im back to day 0, all my progress is gone" and because of that combined with the counter being on a low number they relapse again and again, so they're back in the cycle.

The worst part about that situation is that they weren't even back to day 0 after that 1st fuck up. Not even close. But they think they are so they keep relapsing and falling even further into the hole. And for the record, even that still isn't day 0. It's bad but it's not day 0.

In reality they didn't actually lose that progress after the 1st relapse so if they just got up and kept going they'd be in a great spot but instead they get destroyed because some stupid number which has no meaning got to them mentally.

A similar thing happens when guys have some small insignificant fuck up (See a picture, look at a girl, wet dream etc) and then count that as a "relapse" and reset that pointless counter. Either that or they make a post asking "Is this a relapse?" (seriously I see that exact post daily) and then they get a garbage response telling them to reset which then inevitably leads to that shitty "I'm back to day 0" mentality and then a relapse.

Ive seen these things happen so many times, even to myself and its so stupid. All this shit being caused by a number and a mentality...



Don't let these things happen to you. Treat every day the same, as if its the only day that matters and just fight. The only day that matters is the current one, the past and future have no influence on it. All that matters is today.

Congrats on 7 days! Keep it going! Good luck and stay strong!

 

Keep yourself busy enough so you won't have the chance to even think about watching porn/masturbating.
Call a friend / go to the beach / take a walk to the store and buy something / read a book / clean your room
work out / take a shower
from this point it'll only get better bro.. good job!

 

@JJackson, super good post. I'll tuck that in my back pocket.

 

Appreciate it man!

 

Good job dude! I'm on day 11 of no MO and 21 of no PMO. One day at a time it gets easier when I'm thinking how much this will improve my sex life!

 

you're welcome bro, good job

 

Very effective reply. Thanks for helping

 

No problem man, glad it helped!

 

Indeed. Always live in the moment, like Buddha teaching. What's in the past and future cannot control by us. We can only think about now.

 

very well said

 

Jjackson that was the best nofap comment iv ever and probably will read , reading that alone i think would help alot of people.

 

you should ask yourself this question after 90 days, not after 7.

 

Two words, carry on.

Look forward, put pmo away from your brain forever, and continue your life.

 

Wow, thank you man! That really means a lot to me, much more than you realize. Thanks!

 

Great stuff man, yeah I'm about six weeks in now and I've got a round of golf booked for Saturday, reading books in the evening as well going for runs during the week. It's essential to get enthusiastic about other more productive hobbies and activities. Porn is NOT going to win anymore!