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Letters to Cake; she's in a crisis

Discussion in 'Significant Other Journals' started by 0111zerozero11, Nov 11, 2018.

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  1. 0111zerozero11

    0111zerozero11 Fapstronaut

    Cake,

    Today was the hardest you've had. You haven't seen him in 4 days & the kids are starting to ask questions. Exhausted is an understatement. You've been the sole caretaker of 2 tiny humans who are just like you: intuitive, sensitive, & inquisitive.
    The "why's", "where's daddy", & "momma, are you happy" have led to many forced smiles through the tears.
    Daddy is sick & needs the doctors, just like grandma.
    Your bag of cover-ups for him has run dry & not being *as honest as possible* teaches your children nothing.

    Look at you, Cake; beautiful, intelligent, kind, nurturing, & so many other really awesome things. It's about time you stood up for yourself.

    I know you're scared right now that you'll end up an old lady with 37 cats because who is going to ever want a girl as broken as you? Keep pushing that fear aside; It's what has kept you from following that intuition. Your intuition tells you, you're gonna be just fine when it comes to love.

    Stay strong & proud, like you're teaching your babies. Time heals all wounds
     
    letter, Mordobarn, Vixen and 6 others like this.
  2. Kenzi

    Kenzi Fapstronaut

    Cake,

    Stop lying to the kids.
    Say instead : "you know... I bet daddy will tell you all about when he gets back.
    He'd like to tell you himself."

    Stop lying for him.
    This is better.
    No more cover up.
    Make him tell the kids.
    You are doing just fine.
    Remember, your best is the best you can do.
    Being scared, just means you are doing something brave.
    Take care,
    - Kenzi
     
  3. 0111zerozero11

    0111zerozero11 Fapstronaut

    Girl, I finally did it this evening. The twins were telling me how mean I am & it just came out.
    I told them mommy didn't ask for this, mommy is doing the best she can, & daddy will tell them what's going on (& then I threw up a little in my mouth ;) )
    I'm terrified, so I should be getting my superwoman cape delivered soon, right?

    Thx love~you give me strength
     
  4. 0111zerozero11

    0111zerozero11 Fapstronaut

    Dear Cake,

    You thought yesterday was bad?

    Today, you sobbed into a shirt you wore on your honeymoon. What in the actual fuck is wrong with you? Where did that strong girl go?

    You are being pulled apart, by many forces. They come in forms of a dying mother that wants to give you all of life's lessons in hourly texts messages, when all you want is silence. The guilt is real; toddlers that want want why want no why want 17/24; a human you almost sold your soul to....

    Keep closing your eyes & picturing that little house, in the middle of nowhere, USA. A place like where you grew up. The kids will get to roam free, through fields of flowers, trees, & streams; developing imaginations & emotions, safely. Away from computers as a livelihood, as an escape. Somewhere small, where you can actually depend on your neighbor. They can have this random chicken farm they keep talking about (maybe; you should ask google if that is a good idea).

    You are their hero, they just don't know it yet.

    Patience is a virtue
     
  5. kropo82

    kropo82 Fapstronaut

    There's no way I can press 'like' on this heart-breaking post from another thread. But I do want you to know that we are thinking of you, sending you the strength you need through the ether. I don't know why he's treated you like this, nor why his therapist opened up that line for him to avoid taking responsibility for his own recovery from porn addiction. Mad.

    I have read lots of your posts. I suspect we would not get on in real life (our politics are pretty much opposites) but the strength of your character shines through everything you write. Keep pushing that fear aside, there is no way on earth that you are going to end your years like that, you are not irrevocably broken and I am sure you'll find your match in a partner who brings as much strength, beauty, and faith to the relationship as you bring.

    (N.B. This was going to be a private message, but your profile's locked down so I cannot private message you. I hope it's OK being so 'gushy' publically!)
     
    Last edited: Nov 13, 2018
  6. Queenie%Bee

    Queenie%Bee Fapstronaut

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    Ha ! SO love the gushing probably because our own SO stopped doing that , atleast while active in the addiction . @cakeinacrisis im sure could use all the gushing she can get right now !!
     
  7. 0111zerozero11

    0111zerozero11 Fapstronaut

    You are so kind....
    I value all advice & will take yours to heart.

    You can be as gushy as you want! Embrace those feels ;)

    Thx brother :emoji_hugging:
     
  8. 0111zerozero11

    0111zerozero11 Fapstronaut

    GIVE ME ALL THE GUSHYS :emoji_joy:
     
  9. 0111zerozero11

    0111zerozero11 Fapstronaut

    Dear Cake,

    Hi-five on the single-mommin' it today. Got the kids up, ready, fed, packed, & loaded for "school". 28 degrees this morning. Kids thought that was the perfect time to find any surviving flower in the yard. Half of you wanted to let them explore, but the other half couldn't feel your hands & you were late. You can't stand being late. You promised your daughter a dinosaur princess & your son, cars. All of the cars just to get in the car.
    Your stomach was turned into a knot on the drive. You were convinced your marital "secret" had found it's way to the school. You prepared yourself for the stares, 'I'm sorry's', & casseroles. You assumed because your whole world was flipped upside down, that it affected everybody else, too.
    You knew deep down, nobody knew anything. You have started to prepare yourself for 'attacks', before the attacks even happen, or, not happen. Keep an eye on that....it's your shadow trait trying to rear it's head, again.

    Also, your life is an actual movie, no joke. You should be honored Natalie Portman starred as you...

    ]
     
  10. 0111zerozero11

    0111zerozero11 Fapstronaut

    Dear Cake,

    The Lord is working for you

     
  11. Read this. It helped a lot.

    I respect Janis. Jim Morrison tried to put moves on her and she put him in his place. Good for her. He was a drunk and kinda a shitty poet. Although I do like me some Doors every now and then.
     
  12. 0111zerozero11

    0111zerozero11 Fapstronaut

    I've read this book at least 13 times.

    http://boomerocity.com/pearl-the-obsessions-and-passions-of-janis-joplin.html

    Going to read it again.

    I just keep finding more...I am the face of a full disclosure that never happened. Gutted & fucking hate that it's the holiday season. The last Thanksgiving I will have with my mom; the last my kids will have with their second mother.

    I just keep trying to understand, why me?
    The most traumatic event to happen to a woman, is the loss of her child(ren). 2nd & 3rd, are being the spouse of infidelity & losing a parent. Since April of this year, I've experienced/am experiencing 2 out of 3, once in a life-time, traumatic events.

    Want to go to Vegas? Ha.ha.
     
  13. 0111zerozero11

    0111zerozero11 Fapstronaut

    @Strength And Light is my free self help guide.....truly a deep & spiritual human. He is an old soul, whose wisdom will help many prevail.
    He's going to write my story for me, some day, & earn us a #1 NY Times bestseller spot; he just doesn't know it, yet ;)
     
  14. Kenzi

    Kenzi Fapstronaut

    Absolutely.
    He can get started on yours as soon as he's done with mine... He will need a new project because we all know he can't stand it when he has nothing to do :)
     
    Last edited: Nov 16, 2018
  15. Strength And Light

    Strength And Light Fapstronaut

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  16. Strength And Light

    Strength And Light Fapstronaut

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    I keep typing and erasing, typing and erasing. Words and advice are not a hug, so I don't really have anything to say. :(
     
  17. Kenzi

    Kenzi Fapstronaut

    This.
    I've just got... This
    *Hugs
     
  18. 0111zerozero11

    0111zerozero11 Fapstronaut

    Empathy, sympathy, or pity.
    Your empathy is felt much like a hug & reminds me, I am only human.
    Your empathy will help me heal. I'm grateful that we have crossed paths in my transient darkness.
    Thx brother
     
  19. 0111zerozero11

    0111zerozero11 Fapstronaut

    He sure knows how to turn on the waterworks, huh?
    You guys are amazing; thank you
     
  20. 0111zerozero11

    0111zerozero11 Fapstronaut

    No words are needed; I feel the love from this weird tribe more than I can explain.
    All of you are essentially giving a gift to my children through your sincerity & humbling advice; a mother who makes them proud.
    I know they will thank you guys someday :)
     
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