How do you fight urges?

I could never make it passed 30 days, till I started cold showers.
Wish someone told me about this a long time ago. Made my longest streak of 49 days, went back to warm showers then relapsed for 1 day. Now back on day 40 which is my 2nd highest in 3 years.

(Since it’s winter I don’t go full cold, just cold enough that I can tolerate)

Those healthy habits you’ve implemented are a step in the right direction.

What I suggest may or may not be the key your missing, but it’s working for me.

 

I also do no screen use till 7 pm, it helps to give yourself a certain time restriction. So you can tweak it to what works for you.

 

If you realise the benefits of nofap and think about it, let it sink into your emotions, visualising the person you want to become in the future, and think about the things that person will be doing right now so as to become that person, all those urges will run away, you won't find them because your mindset is stationed by actively thinking about positivity. You feel all these urges because subconsciously you have allowed them to come in by automatic subjection. Thinking about where you want to be tomorrow, all those urges will disappear.

 

I use the 10 minute rule (from a book called "The Willpower Instinct"): instead of telling yourself: "No", tell yourself: "Yes, but in 10 more minutes". Then, before the ten minutes are up, remind yourself why you started rebooting in the first place, how much better your life will be upon beating this addiction, what benefits you'll receive, possible side benefits, how much better you'll feel about yourself, etc.

 

You should learn to face your self... No one else come to save you...How many bad feeling come after this bad habit...Write a note for your self. what you want to become and what are your goals and how much you lost it in past...write it clear and true don,t be lie to your self at note...keep it safe with your self...and read when u have urges

 

Its not the right framing of the question.

The point of this isn't to "stop a behavior" it's to instead move from one lifestyle to another. If you have strong enough motivation to do something healthy with your sexuality and you are moving into that, it's easy to tell yourself you can wait, because something better is down the road. Thats delayed gratification.

If it's just "i want to stop." You probably won't succeed. That just sexual suppression and that doesn't really work that well.

So i'd say - why do you want to stop?
What are you going towards instead?

Are those reasons good enough to give you a good reason to stop?

In relation to urge control.

There are 4 key strategies. Delay, evade, accept, and substitute. I personally accept my urges and know that something better is on the other side of them. I don't fight my urges to make them go away.