Numb genitals - very depressed

Hello guys,

Sorry for my bad english but i'm french

I'm 39 and have big genital/sexual problems since i'm 22.

I use porn for masturbation since i'm 15 (soft porn from 15 to 18, harder and harder from 18 until now)

Here are the steps of my issues :

1- no problem at all until 22. Nude women pictures and "soft" porn made my excitation grow very fast, had perfect erections and ejaculations with great pleasure. I was masturbating once or twice a week approximatively.

2- Near 20-22 i began to watch harder porns each day and masturbate more frequently "thanks to" internet, at least once or twice a day. At this period i was student, was smoking and drinking frequently and never had real sex with girls (for the context). One day i woke up with a strange feeling : my penis was numb, no feeling, no sensation, as if it was "empty" or "disconnected" from the rest of my body. I was very stressed by this situation. I decided to reduce masturbation frequency, but the issue was still there. I began to panic... I decided to stop masturbation during 2-3 weeks approximatively. Then one day i recovered very good feeling and sensations again and was so happy (thinking the problem could be solved with time) that i masturbated twice, one time just after the another, and then the nightmare began...

3- Just after the second masturbation, i felt something was wrong. This masturbation was made without pleasure, was "forced" and my penis wasn't really erected (still recovering from first masturbation). Then i ejaculated again and my scrotum/testicles became very tight and high, and my penis very retracted and small and numb again. So after these 2 masturbations, i was again with a numb and insensitive penis but in addition, i had very tight scrotum and testicles, numbness and low sensations in all the genital "region" (testicles + penis). Since then, my penis is always very retracted, shrunk, and testicles are always very retracted too, high, and scrotum very tight... It's like when it's cold or when you are feared of something, but always... I feel like if my penis and testicles are always in post ejaculation posture, as if they are always "tired" and "recovering", if it means something...

Sometimes after a very hot shower, my penis and testicles are less retracted, and more "loosy", but all day long, they are retracted and numb. The worst situation is after defecation, it's like all the muscles are tighting and penis and testicles are very tight too and retracted after peeing or more often after defecation...

4- I made several tests with doctors during all these years : neurologic, organic, doppler for vascularisation, etc... But nothing was really found, i was just said : "maybe anxiety, in your head, etc..."
I have to note that the doppler results were showing that even with an injection of Papaverine 8mg (to provoque erection), i had a very bad and incomplete erection... Can anxiety provoque such a thing ? Can anxiety reduce arterial flux during doppler ? I dont know, maybe... What i am sure about is that i developped very important anxiety and even panic disorder...

5- I had real sex with a girlfriend i staid with from 25 yo to 32, but without any pleasure (no real good sensations), bad or no erections, etc...
She finally left me, and i think this problem was the first reason...
I was so sad not being able to satisfy her and not even more satisfy myself with sex anymore...

6- During all these years, i was able to have erections but only bad (weak) ones, never when standing up, and only with porn and masturbation. And even with porn, the erections doesn't last very long. The base of the penis is still flexible during erection and i could even have a pee in this state, what i could'nt do with full normal 100% hard erection... No spontaneous erections, no noticeable "morning wood". No full erection like before, no pleasure in ejaculation, and as soon as it is finished, the penis shrinks and retracts.

7- I already tried to stop masturbation during few months when i was with my GF. Only result was nocturnal ejaculations which woke me up and made me very sad of my situation without true sexuality. But i don't remember if i totally stopped porn and visual excitations at this period.

8- Conclusion -
I'm totally lost and i need your help...
I want to test totally stop porn and masturbation and try to "reboot".
I've stopped porn and masturbation since 7 months now. Sometimes i feel it's better (i have morning wood each day, even if still numb), but sometimes i feel like nothing changed... Up and down...

What could be my problem ? :
- anxiety, panic which induce ED and tight pelvic floor ?
- porn addiction which need recovery ?
- organic problem ?

Sorry again for my bad english, and my very long text, hope everything's clear and someone will read it and give me some advices or share his own experience which could help me (same symptoms, etc...).

Thank you for reading,

 

Thx for your replies.

As i mentioned in my post, i already saw so many doctors, but nothing was found, they couldn't help me...

I'll try to reboot more. Currently i'm around 7 months hard mode.
Is it possible that a depression could cause these symptoms ?? Or maybe a nerve issue ?

I really don't understand, i try to analyse the symptoms but nothing seems logic. Sometimes it's better, sometimes i'm really depressed and cry... Sometimes i regain hope because my penis and balls feel more relaxed, and the day after, all the genital region is ultra tight (like hard flaxid and ball sack very tight) and always numb.

Everyday there are precum leakages... I feel a tension in the pelvic region and precum comes out my penis even without any arousal...

I'm totally lost guys... I don't have sexual life any more since so many years, it's like hell

 

Thx again for your precious advises.

One more question. What about the numbness, the loss of sensitivity in the genital region ? I mean my penis, testicles and mostly my glans feel nearly totally insensitive...

They feel like if i was just having sex or masturbating, even if not, like a constant refractory period of my penis-genital-pelvic region (i'm in hard mode since 7months, no PMO).

I feel like i'm living in a constant refractory period which never ends...

Could this be a symptom of excess masturbation during many years ?

Moreover, kegel seems very weak. When i do kegel, the penis doesn't respond as it was used to before my issues. It doesn't move at all, while it was filling with blood when everything was ok... When i finish peeing, and try to kegel, the urine expulsion (jet) is very weak, and urine and precum are leaking few time after (and ball sack very very tight and testicles high)...

Sorry for my long question and bad english !

 

Thanks, i'll continue my reboot then...
Not easy because hope and despair are fluctuating one day from another, sometimes i feel like i'm curing, sometimes like i'm regressing, but nofap website helps me to believe i'll be better whatever the time it takes.

 

10 months hard mode no PMO.

Still no real improvement.

Still genital numbness (penis + testicles).

My testicles are always rising up, scrotum always very tight, never feel loose, as if kegel muscles were always working, even if i don't clench them...

I feel bad... Why my balls are no more hanging and scrotum is always tight ? Why my pelvic muscles seem to be ineffective, my penis and testicles are nearly not moving at all when i try to clench kegels...
I sometimes have morning wood (75%), but genitals are numb and testicles seem cramped, never loose. Penis often shrivel and hardflaccid.

Can Overmasturbation really cause this ? Can nofap really cure this ? I feel totally depressed, nothing happens with time, as if it was incurable....

 

Are you sure the diet was the root of these changes ?

Did you masturbate a lot during this period ? Do you feel the "hardflaccid" penis sensation ?

I personaly feel as if my penis was "disconnected", as if my genitals was always in "refractory period". My right testicle is always high, as if a muscular tension made it always rise up.

I feel like if a muscular tension made my genitals/penis/pelvic areas always tense, which would cause tightness and numbness...

- The situation and tightness is worst : after peeing and bowel movements, when it's cold, when i'm standing up, when i do sport

- The situation is a little better when it's warm (hot shower) and when i'm in my bed (lying down)...

How to stop this ? Abstaining solved nothing, just waiting solved nothing, being less stressed solved nithing, seeing many doctors solved nothing... I don't know what to do anymore.

 

I already do this, without success...

I'm lost dude. I don't know what to do anymore and really don't see why it doesn't heal by itself... It's worse that a direct injury. With an injury, you know what's the problem, and what to do or not to do.
In my situation, nothing is rational and no doc find a solution.
Maybe i should see a PT for PF, but i'm so despaired that i don't even have the courage... I'm afraid to be told nothing's wrong by docs once again...

 

Thanks for your answer arsenalfun...
Did you have the same problem ? Did you solve it ?
What's your story ?

Do you mean ALL my symptoms could be due to PF issue ?

I'm really thankfull with your help, and time you took to register and answer me...

 

Ok thx
Yes i know what is reverse kegels, but which type of exercices/frequency/strength do you preconize for them ?

I have an important question : your problems are only on penis or do/did you have scrotum/testicles symptoms too ? I mean i always have tight scrotum and rising up testicles, as if a muscle was always contracting (not a normal contraction as before).

I feel like if penis and testicles are always in refractory period... Very strange. No more excitable.

Do you have numbness in penis/testicles/scrotum too ??

 

Ok i think your case is not as bad as mine... By far...

I can't have any spontaneous erection. I can only have erections with porn AND with masturbation.

Sometimes i have morning woods, but the penis doesn't fill completely, and without any pleasure.

Penis feels disconnected, and always retracted as a child penis...

And all the symptoms i mentioned in my first post.