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My Journal. The weaker I get, the stronger I become.

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by emanuel_free, Apr 1, 2019.

  1. emanuel_free

    emanuel_free Fapstronaut

    I did, I do, I will !! Jesus always Him.
     
  2. emanuel_free

    emanuel_free Fapstronaut

    #Day 8

    Back to where i was. They say that 7 is perfect number and 8 a new beginning so here I am. Not an easy week though easier than the last one. I hope to keep going on at least just for today. One day at a time it's enough.

    Paul says to Titmothy (2 Timothy 2.4 -MSG-):

    "A soldier on duty doesn’t get caught up in making deals at the marketplace. He concentrates on carrying out orders."

    Like TobyMac song I'll be a soldier that keeps walking on...



    God will be my Guardian at every single step Psalms 121.3 says that He won't let us stumble, that our Guardian won't fall asleep.

    God bless!
     
  3. emanuel_free

    emanuel_free Fapstronaut

    #Day 20

    Still on the way. Fighting, doubting, but marching on. God is there, guiding me. I trust Him, He will deliver as He always does. I recently posted on Christian forums the MSG translation of 1 Co. 10.12 : "Forget about self-confidence; it’s useless. Cultivate God-confidence." So In my heart I'm cultivating this seed of God-confidence. Trying to filter every decision through Him so I make the right ones.

    Since it's my 20th day, I'd like to share the Psalm 20. This Psalm is a prayer asking for the victory. Something that everybody does here! :) And on verses 7 and 8 says :

    7 Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God.
    8 They collapse and fall, but we rise and stand upright.

    Though we can fall, the difference with the rest of the world is that we have the name of the Lord our God on our minds. The very helmet of our armor is His Salvation says Paul (Ephesians 6). That's why we can collapse, "but we rise and stand upright again". We MUST "be on our feet, standing tall", as the MSG translates it.

    God bless you all and give us the strength to trust Him and build our confidence and trust in Him. Amen!
     
  4. emanuel_free

    emanuel_free Fapstronaut

    Day #0 again :(

    Not easy. Not new beginnings are. When we start things, we have sin on our backs, and we tend to fall if we do it on our own. But when God started everything It was all good. He's perfect, that is His standard and asks that very same thing from us. He did it with israel (Lv. 11.44) and with His church Mt 5.48.

    A dear friend here showed me that we have to submit to God and resist the devil but we tend to do the other way around. It's true.

    All we need It's you Lord. Amen!

     
  5. You know whats funny. I was thinking like you as well "The weaker I get the stronger I become" it is true... but can you fight that much ? The weaker you get the more you must fight. The weaker you get the smaller will be your steps you can make. The weaker you get you will fail more before doing a little progress. You don't get weaker if you lose you get weaker if you don't fight with everything you got. Those who experienced most are those who are the strongest right ? But those need to accept that their path was not just hard but lethal.
     
  6. emanuel_free

    emanuel_free Fapstronaut

    Thanks for coming and sharing helping me to overcome this !
    I see your point. The context of that phrase is form the Bible :
    But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
    For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
    (2 Corinthians 12.9-10)

    And here is the thing the smaller I become and the weaker the more I depend on Him to be my strength! Because all I can in Christ when He strengthen me !! Phillpians 4.13; Ephesians 6.10.

    Jesus puts this way : Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. (Matthew 16.24)

    That means, less of your own power and more of God's power! It's when we believe this truth and trust Him that we can be stronger on our weakness so the glory goes to Him.

    Is not us we are weak but it is He IN us : For this I toil, struggling with all his energy that he powerfully works within me. (Colossians 1.29)

    That's is why the weaker I get the stronger I become. Because when I depend on my own strength, and I think I am my own boss...there is when I fail and fall. But when I put my faith on Jesus, and God's power through His Holy Spirit is on me. Then is when things changes, and I start to win this. And this is a whole life trip walking on The Road !! (John 14.6)

    God bless you !!
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  7. emanuel_free

    emanuel_free Fapstronaut

    #Day 5

    I must say that this days are not easy, I think in a way I'm stronger on my urges but still fighting with some lust in me. I've learned about how bad P-subs are and those hide very deep and are hard to find sometime.

    On Daniel 11.32 the prophecy about the Syrian king Antiochus IV Epiphanes. This king was bad news for the jews. He started a persecution of them and desecrated the sanctuary and took advantage of those who were corrupted, those who"violate the covenant" says. And he did it with flattery, many of them wanted the benefit before the responsibility. One of them was the high priest of the moment Menelus who had a lucrative arrangement with Antiochus.

    Sometimes I found myself doing this. Putting my principles aside and forget all about responsibility. It's like I ended up as corrupted as Menelaus. But the worst part is that the benefits don't last. That's why I want to stay clear of everything, like P-subs or anything that can make me "violate the covenant". The one that God make with me through Jesus on that cross (Jer. 31.31-34; Heb 8; Matt. 26.28 ). He took my sins and made me free. You know who is the worst kind of slave? The one that being able to walk freely decided to stay as a slave. And yet I've stumbled many times and decided to go back and live like a slave when I know I'm free.

    The lies, empty promises and flattery of an empty king called PM or PMO (you name yours) can trick you. Because sometimes the devil is like a lion waiting, trying to scare you and attack as Peter says (1 Peter 5.8-9), but sometimes he uses flattery like the prostitute on proverbs leading us to the same end if we are not wise enough (Proverbs 7.21). But the temptation is within us according to Paul and James (1 Corinthians 10.13 and James 1.14). And God has the exit key to our chain.

    Let's not fall for it. The road back to slavery and the road to freedom have something in common. Both starts with one small step. Which will you take today, backward or forward?

    God bless you! :)
     
    Last edited: May 3, 2019
    Deleted Account and Tao Jones like this.
  8. Have you thought about coming to terms with those urges instead of avoiding them? Do something that allows you to feed the curiosity in a good way?
     
  9. I feel like my life in the neighborhood is transparent too!
     
  10. Timothy Keller and John Piper on youtube are great,also Rick Warren!
     
    emanuel_free likes this.
  11. emanuel_free

    emanuel_free Fapstronaut

    What do you mean with "coming to terms" ? Like what practical ways would you suggest?
     
  12. The answer to that would be that, it depends on/differs for each person. But you can find out your own by taking some time out to read the following conversation:

    https://nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/fearless-of-triggers.217806/

    Best of luck
     
    emanuel_free likes this.
  13. emanuel_free

    emanuel_free Fapstronaut

    Today I've decided to reset my clock. I've been reading some posts and realised that though I'm fighting PM since I'm married my goals were different. So I've changed that so my goals are clear.

    I've been reading about P-subs and realised that also I've some and that I need to fight them If I want to change this part of my life and became serious if I want to get somewhere.

    After reading and thinking about what crazyaf said I've noticed something.

    Look what I've read on the Bible:

    David said, “I’ve been a shepherd, tending sheep for my father. Whenever a lion or bear came and took a lamb from the flock, I’d go after it, knock it down, and rescue the lamb. If it turned on me, I’d grab it by the throat, wring its neck, and kill it. Lion or bear, it made no difference—I killed it. And I’ll do the same to this Philistine pig who is taunting the troops of God-Alive. God, who delivered me from the teeth of the lion and the claws of the bear, will deliver me from this Philistine.”
    (1 Samuel 17.34–37 -MSG-).

    Lions and Bears, were part of David's day to day life, they lived there and David worked there. His work was to feed the sheep and guide them to good water and pastures. But he was aware of what could happened in between, and he knew that there were lions and bears on their natural habitat, while he was a pilgrim on their lands. To protect their lands or to eat, they were waiting to devour him and his way of living as a shepherd.

    The post I've read says "lust it's part of your life". And it is. Like lions and bears lived on David's lands, urges and triggers are living on our lust. Lust is no other thing that sexual drive out of control. On controlled sex life urges and triggers with your wife are as God intended for the beginning. But the sin made us lusting after other women, or images of them. So urges and triggers became lions and bears ready to kill for satisfaction. Is their habitat and instinct. As we are pilgrims on a land that promotes this wrong behaviour, we should know they are there but we also should know God as deliverer. So we can say " God who delivered me" like David. Over time Lions and bears were extinct on David land's though archaeological studies say that they used to live there.

    Let's know it first hand. We are on lust land, urges and triggers are ready to attack. Let's be prepared so we can go and kill them before they win, God will deliver us.
     
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  14. I'm not trying to be a dick, but what do you mean by "The weaker I get, the stronger I become"?
     
  15. https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=2+Corinthians+12:9-10&version=NLT

    "...to keep me from becoming proud, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger from Satan to torment me and keep me from becoming proud. Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

    It's a Jesus thing. Probably will not make much sense to those who are not his disciples.
     
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  16. emanuel_free

    emanuel_free Fapstronaut

    Tao is right.

    I wrote this some posts before, to someone who asked me the same thing :

    "Thanks for coming and sharing helping me to overcome this !
    I see your point. The context of that phrase is form the Bible :
    But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
    For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
    (2 Corinthians 12.9-10)

    And here is the thing the smaller I become and the weaker the more I depend on Him to be my strength! Because all I can in Christ when He strengthen me !! Phillpians 4.13; Ephesians 6.10.

    Jesus puts this way : Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. (Matthew 16.24)

    That means, less of your own power and more of God's power! It's when we believe this truth and trust Him that we can be stronger on our weakness so the glory goes to Him.

    Is not us we are weak but it is He IN us : For this I toil, struggling with all his energy that he powerfully works within me. (Colossians 1.29)

    That's is why the weaker I get the stronger I become. Because when I depend on my own strength, and I think I am my own boss...there is when I fail and fall. But when I put my faith on Jesus, and God's power through His Holy Spirit is on me. Then is when things changes, and I start to win this. And this is a whole life trip walking on The Road !! (John 14.6)

    God bless you !! "

    Hope it helps you. :)
    Thank you ! And thanks Tao :)
     
    Tao Jones and Anew2019 like this.
  17. Anew2019

    Anew2019 Fapstronaut

    Thank you for this explanation. I have been trying to figure this out myself. This makes sense.
     
    emanuel_free likes this.
  18. emanuel_free

    emanuel_free Fapstronaut

    #Day 30 ! My second longest streak.

    Hi this is a special day I've made it to 30 days. Many things have changed, and as I always say many things that I've to change yet. 30 days It's a beginning not an end.

    How I made it? Not easy. I've been reading Psalm 119 and I think that unconsciously I did what Psalm 119.101-104 (ESV) says :
    I hold back my feet from every evil way,
    in order to keep your word.

    I do not turn aside from your rules,
    for you have taught me.
    How sweet are your words to my taste,
    sweeter than honey to my mouth!
    Through your precepts I get understanding;
    therefore I hate every false way.

    No, I didn't do it perfectly. I did hold my feet back from evil ways, but I need to do it more. To be strong enough to love more and enjoy more the Word of God. I do hate the false ways of P M but not enough. I've to work hard on every aspect of this.

    Since I'm on a part of my way that I don't know yet, like Israel crossing Jordan I'll put God in front of me as they did putting the ark and letting Him be the guide (Joshua 3). Now is time to go further to sanctify myself more to God (Joshua 3.5).

    As I walk I'll pray with Psalm 119.133 -136 (MSG) :
    Steady my steps with your Word of promise
    so nothing malign gets the better of me.
    Rescue me from the grip of bad men and women
    so I can live life your way.
    Smile on me, your servant;
    teach me the right way to live.
    I cry rivers of tears
    because nobody’s living by your book!


    It's my pray that we can do it better, that God steady the steps of all of us through His Word of promise. Because this sin has taken so much blessings from us, so much good times and love with the people God has put there to love us. We don't want let this sin to take the best of us. May we are the ones who live by God's Book and not errantly on unknown ways. On Jesus name. Amen.
     
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  19. Congrats, excellent job. That's how you glorify Christ. I hope you continue with the success.
     
    emanuel_free likes this.
  20. emanuel_free

    emanuel_free Fapstronaut

    I've decided to start over. To many P-subs made me pmo again. And I feel awful for it. I've been so stressed lately that started to get away from my bible readings and prayers as usual. I'll fix that today. I can't go on like this. I had a 60 day streak as the longest one. So I know I'm able to beat this. ONE DAY AT A TIME. I tend to forget that.

    My hope is that God will lead me there.
    God bless you.
     
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