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Is waiting for marriage stupid?

Discussion in 'Off-topic Discussion' started by Lexie, Jul 31, 2019.

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  1. Lexie

    Lexie Fapstronaut

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    Hi everyone
    I'm an 18 year-old female and all of my friends have had sex or have done other sexual things but I haven't. I just wanna know what others think about a girl who doesn't wanna have sex before marriage. What do you think and would you ever date someone who doesn't want to have sex before marriage? (Not sure if that's what I wanna do tho)
    Please answer honestly
    Thank you
     
  2. Dat95

    Dat95 Fapstronaut

    Everyone has their own timeline, dear. Don’t stress out about what others might think! What do you think???
     
    Lexie and Deleted Account like this.
  3. Jwarrior77

    Jwarrior77 Fapstronaut

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    Waiting for marriage is definitely not stupid at all. It makes intimacy with your partner that much closer and you won't be carrying any baggage around from past relationships that have gone bad. You also have a very low chance of getting std's compared to sleeping around with a bunch of people. I'm 18 as well and plan on waiting for marriage so it's not like there isn't other people out there not doing it.
     
  4. WalkingForward

    WalkingForward Fapstronaut

    It's not stupid. It's honorable. Especially as a female, it's very easy to have casual sex. Waiting for marriage is strong.

    My parents divorced when I was 4 years old and now I'm completely destroyed for life. I don't think I'll ever get married, I'm too messed up. I live in a part of the world where the sacredness of marriage is not respected and people sleep around like bonobo apes.

    Waiting for marriage and respecting the sacredness of marriage is a valuable tradition.
     
  5. chonky

    chonky Fapstronaut

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  6. Iamcryinginside

    Iamcryinginside Fapstronaut

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    -_________________________- it's your choice, see, some people don't want to have sex because, they think it's disgusting or they want to stay away from having loads of dopamine from just shagging someone. people have sex before marriage before marriage because they are too impatient to actually wait or ,they think satisfaction from sex doesnt get affected from a shite piece of paper, idk, i think i heard that there was a study that you get better sex from waiting but Idk, people don't even marry in general because of the shitty divorce process that is biased (especially child custody). Either way it's your choice, fucking capitalism and freedom and all that
    -___________________________________________________________________________________________________________-
     
    Lexie likes this.
  7. EXPONENTIALLY

    EXPONENTIALLY Fapstronaut

    I think a girl waiting for marriage is so precious and good, you surpass all of your friends in terms of morals, health (mental health as well) and energy to live your life (sexual transmutation).

    Anybody that lost their virginity before marriage will have difficulty to bond with their spouse, cheating in marriage is related to how many sexual partners you had before it. Anybody not virgin in that sense, feels cheap and so they build up that silly peer pressure to deny how they truly feel about it trying to make it normal, and it's due to the corruption that reigns in some industries as well.

    So just stay pure and cultivate your power and serenity, through positive outlets rather than deceitful sex no matter how rationalized and pacified it is. Deep inside, everybody knows it's wrong and destructive BIG time. That's why marriage exists, to avoid fornication and the related problems it causes to people and society. Marriage is the confined environment for a man and a woman to love and enjoy themselves in a safe and intense way. Because if you deplete your fire over and over it dissipates and you find it harder and harder to bond, like a scotch tip used over and over. But 2 scotch tips that have never been pasted on anything joined together? They are ONE and won't break up.

    So keep on. You should even inspire every girl to abstain from deceits and accumulate for prosperity.

    IGNORE all that nonsense rationalizing noise, keep on girl.

     
  8. L1ttl

    L1ttl Fapstronaut

    The wisest decision you can make. I actually would much rather marry a virgin than someone who is not. (If we both save sex for marriage, that is to me precious)
     
    Last edited: Jul 31, 2019
  9. WalkingForward

    WalkingForward Fapstronaut

    I only watched the first 2 minutes of that clip (because I'm a bit busy at the moment). But I don't think he should be so judgemental and use that kind of language. Like Jesus said: "He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her". Also, it's not only those women's fault for being promiscuous, the men they're sleeping with are equally responsible.

    Like I wrote in my post above, I'm very supportive of waiting for marriage. I just think the guy in that video was rude and also very unhelpful, that type of language is not persuasive.
     
    Last edited: Jul 31, 2019
  10. EXPONENTIALLY

    EXPONENTIALLY Fapstronaut

    Jesus being God and the Word, said anything in the Bible.


    Proverbs 7:7-27 (KJV) And beheld among the simple ones, I discerned among the youths, a young man void of understanding,
    Passing through the street near her corner; and he went the way to her house,
    In the twilight, in the evening, in the black and dark night:
    And, behold, there met him a woman with the attire of an harlot, and subtil of heart.
    (She is loud and stubborn; her feet abide not in her house:
    Now is she without, now in the streets, and lieth in wait at every corner.)
    So she caught him, and kissed him, and with an impudent face said unto him,
    I have peace offerings with me; this day have I payed my vows.
    Therefore came I forth to meet thee, diligently to seek thy face, and I have found thee.
    I have decked my bed with coverings of tapestry, with carved works, with fine linen of Egypt.
    I have perfumed my bed with myrrh, aloes, and cinnamon.
    Come, let us take our fill of love until the morning: let us solace ourselves with loves.
    For the goodman is not at home, he is gone a long journey:
    He hath taken a bag of money with him, and will come home at the day appointed.
    With her much fair speech she caused him to yield, with the flattering of her lips she forced him.
    He goeth after her straightway, as an ox goeth to the slaughter, or as a fool to the correction of the stocks;
    Till a dart strike through his liver; as a bird hasteth to the snare, and knoweth not that it is for his life.
    Hearken unto me now therefore, O ye children, and attend to the words of my mouth.
    Let not thine heart decline to her ways, go not astray in her paths.
    For she hath cast down many wounded: yea, many strong men have been slain by her.
    Her house is the way to hell, going down to the chambers of death.
     
  11. onceaking

    onceaking Fapstronaut

    If my girlfriend is a virgin and wants to save herself for marriage I would respect it. But I would say to you it would ok if you don't make it to marriage a virgin. Sometimes things happen and people have sex. When that happens people can live in shame and feel guilty whenever they have sex (even if they're married). Shame is a killer and we should fight it. Honestly, I don't think to have pre-martial sex is as much of a big as some religious people make it out to be but as I said I'll respect my girlfriend's boundaries. It's unloving for anyone to disrespect boundaries in a relationship.
     
    Last edited: Jul 31, 2019
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  12. onceaking

    onceaking Fapstronaut

    Exactly! The video is absolutely gross! He has no problem with guys going around having casual sex but women who do that are whores.

    Reminds of Lil Kim said in one of her songs:
    Here's something I just can't understand
    If a guy have three girls then he's the man
    He can even give her some ****, then sex her ***
    If a girl do the same, then she's a whore

    This is a much better video:


    Personally, I would have no problem with being married to a woman who has slept around. As long as she's worked on herself and healed from the pain the past is the past. I think every healthy person has to work on themselves to be healthy.

    You show me a woman who can actually sit with a man in real vulnerability and fear, I'll show you a woman who's done incredible work. You show me a man who can sit with a woman who's just had it, she can't do it all anymore, and his first response is not, "I unloaded the dishwasher!" But he really listens - because that's all we need - I'll show you a guy who's done a lot of work. - Brené Brown

    Saving yourself for marriage doesn't mean you're able to be vulnerable.



     
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  13. That seems perfect girl go me.
     
    Lexie likes this.
  14. onceaking

    onceaking Fapstronaut

    No anyone who has intimacy and attachment disorders will have difficulty to bond. It's so ironic that this is stated by a porn addict when most addicts have intimacy and attachment disorders. I would be willing to bet that porn addicts have more of a problem with intimacy and attachment than someone who's had premarital sex.

     
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  15. It's definitely not stupid. It's extremely wise. And if a guy doesn't want to be with you because he has to wait to have sex with you and he doesn't care about your moral standards, why would you even want to be with such a guy? Find someone better.

    It would be absolutely no sweat off my back if I had to dump a guy for not respecting my sexual boundaries. Good riddance. There are plenty of men out there who also believe in waiting until marriage, and still more who don't necessarily have that standard themselves but would absolutely be respectful of you for having it.

    DO NOT CHANGE YOURSELF AND YOUR MORALS FOR WHAT YOU THINK STUPID BOYS MIGHT WANT.
    (Not saying all men are stupid boys. But any so-called "man" who pressures you into sex before you're ready is, indeed, a stupid boy.)

    Anyone who doesn't want to wait for you, isn't deserving of you. Period.

    If you're still unconvinced, I would highly recommend you actually look into (via Google or YouTube or something) the statistics on people who wait for marriage, and why it's a good idea. It absolutely is a great idea for many many reasons. And again... if you meet a guy who seems great, but he isn't respectful of your boundaries and doesn't want to wait, then he is NOT a great guy. You can find someone better, trust me. Please do not give up something valuable of yourself because you think a guy is a good guy when he isn't respecting your boundaries and your moral standards. He's not a good guy. He's selfish, and he's not worth your time.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 31, 2019
  16. I dont see the point personally in saving yourself, unless its in some religious scripture of some kind. I honestly say fuck it, live your life.

    But more importantly i wouldnt take any of our advice on here. I think you should make that decision and don't let potential sexual/romantic partners determine your decision.

    As far as would i date somebody that is saving themself? I have no idea, i would really have to like them. And there would have to be some sexual action to be taken.

    But yeah, i say fuck it. For example, which may or may not be in my case, if both the girl and guy are std'd checked and the girl has something called an "IUD" , which i recently found out what it was and is a miracle from gynecologists. Then whats the harm in having unprotected sex? Know what im saying?

    Its a 0% of STDs. And a 0.0001% of pregnancy. I'll roll tf outta those dice
     
    Lexie likes this.
  17. Lexie

    Lexie Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for answering
     
  18. Lexie

    Lexie Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for answering
     
  19. Lexie

    Lexie Fapstronaut

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    Thank you :)
     
  20. Trancespotter

    Trancespotter Fapstronaut

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