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One year without porn, 79 days without PMO

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by BreakingBenjamin, Aug 14, 2019.

  1. BreakingBenjamin

    BreakingBenjamin Fapstronaut

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    Hey, after more than a year following this forum i wanted to share my experiences with NoFap too.
    I looked for nudity images for the first time when i was 8 years old, i googled it and since the didnt know too much about hiding it, my parents cought my search history and explained to me that this behavior is forbidden.

    I following their advice untill i was 12, since then i was masturbating to porn on a daily basis, it started with stripping videos and playboy images, and escalated to
    solo masturbation, vaginal sex, solo anal, threesomes, orgies, anal, ass to mouth, hentai,gangbangs and BBC. at that point i wasnt so worried even though i was already deep inside the hole..

    When i was 17 i got used to all the "regular porn" and started to get obsesssed with transwoman porn and occasionally gay porn in addition to the genres that i already watched. At 20 i started viewing scat porn and at 22 i got into vomiting scenes.

    Sometimes at this point i would masturbated like 6 times in 3 hours or 3 times before i even got out of bed in the morning. I would avoid doing my daily chores and homework by escaping to fapping.

    Last year after being rejected again and again by the women that i wanted in real life i decided that i must stop my behavior because i knew that it has gotten WAY too far and that my taste of porn has moved lightyears from my initial preferences.
    Before that event,i tried to quit porn and fapping but i only lasted 10 days max, and i knew that taking a step back from PMO`ing has a good effect on my mood and behavior even if it was only 10 days.

    Since July of 2018 i havent watched any porn, and in parallel i tried to quit masturbation. For the last year i had much better streaks from M, 60 days, 30 day, 40, etc.. right now i`m on my longes streak of 79 days.

    My mind still misses and craves the very graphic scenes i used to watch, and these days before 90 are very rough, but i know that nothing good in this life comes easy so i`m doing my best to stay sober everyday because in the end it will worth it.

    If someone would say to the old me that in 2019 i would be able to live without PMO`ing for more than 20 days he wouldnt believe it, and will only dream of being in the position that i am today, even though the struggles

    Stay Strong, nothing good in life comes easy.
    Good thing are waiting for you ahead.

    I would be happy if anyone could give me advices of what to do next and how to improve in life and avoid craving as much as possible.
    If anyone has a question i would be happy to answer :)

     
  2. keepitreal-88

    keepitreal-88 Fapstronaut

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    Congratulations on doing so well, Over 1 year no porn is a huge achievement. How has your life changed since you stopped watching porn, physically? are you stronger, have more energy, do you exercise any more than you used to? Emotionally? do you feel any happier, do you have a brighter outlook, do you get along better with people, are people more interested in being around you, do you have more friends and better relationships, have you considered how you come across and think about where you can create value in an interaction? Mentally? Is your mind clearer, do you engage in new interests, do you like learning, do you know what the next step is to improve an area of your life and are you taking it?

    There are swarms of people on here that expect their whole life to be transformed simply by stopping PMO and changing absolutely nothing else in their life, it's almost like a plague, most of the people that stumble onto nofap catch it, I get the sense that you're realising or have realised that no porn and fap isn't a fix by itself. Change and improvement comes from what you are doing differently, ditching PMO is a huge and crucial first step, but only when you have new things that your focusing on will the cravings shrink.
     
  3. BreakingBenjamin

    BreakingBenjamin Fapstronaut

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    One month after beginning my rehab from PMO i signed up to my local gym, lifted heavy and got 10 kilos in the following year. I also started an engineering degree in a good college at that time. In the beginning i was afraid of all these sudden and radical changes of my lifestyle, but i`m actually getting good grades and feel great after excercising.
    I am still single (and virgin) though, and i have some good friends that i can trust, but i`m dont think that stopping PMO has improved my social skills drastically. But one thing certain, i know that if something bad happens to me during the day, my ability to accept the reality and failure and yet not falling down and giving up because to that, has improved. And i am more positive in general.
    If i experience a hard day, sometimes i think about "fapping it out" to become happier, but i reject these thought because i learned that resisting the urge builds a stronger personality and it will help in the future
     
  4. keepitreal-88

    keepitreal-88 Fapstronaut

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    Well done man, great to see you're progressing on other things and don't let bad things keep you down. Us humans are crap at predicting what is going to make us feel good, the thought of P and M might get our heart racing but it almost never feels good when the act is over and done with and we're contemplating it afterwards.

    It might be worth studying and working on charisma and social skills if you want to improve in that area, charisma on command on youtube seems like a good place to start.
     
  5. Keep busy is the best way to keep your mind free, and limit PC time.
     
  6. BreakingBenjamin

    BreakingBenjamin Fapstronaut

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    In the beginning i think that one major reason for me to M was the false thinking that it will make me feel better.. its not true.
    And yes, i think what i seek the most is to expand the circle of people i hang with and make better connection with people around me..

    You are right, when i`m not studying i like to exercise or play drums and sometimes i go out with friends.. staying busy helps in the process of NoFap, especially in the beginning.
     
    Buddhabro likes this.
  7. BreakingBenjamin

    BreakingBenjamin Fapstronaut

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    I also have an intresting change in the pattern of my wet dreams.
    In the first half year without porn i used to have a wet dream once in a month about the porn scenes that i used to watch
    Lately, when i have wet dreams, i dream that i`m watching the scene, but i tell myself in the dream that i`ve come too far (even when i`m asleep im aware of my NoFap goals) and i stop myself from "watching" the scene..
    When i wake up of these kind of dreams i feel like maybe something might be really changing in my brain after all this time of abstaining from porn and masturbation !
     
    Buddhabro likes this.
  8. BreakingBenjamin

    BreakingBenjamin Fapstronaut

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    I made it to 90 days today for the first time ! :D
     
    testwarz, Vitoriosa and rand0m like this.
  9. LavaMe

    LavaMe Fapstronaut

    Congratulations! I’ve found the last days before 90 (this is my first time getting even closer) to be tough as well. It seems like you have a great attitude.

    I struggle getting scenes out of my mind too. It may be we never are able to fully get rid of them. That may be the price to pay. That may be the price all the people promoting and allowing porn deceitfully cover up. This may be the scar we bear. But we can bear it proudly if we overcome PMO.
     
  10. BreakingBenjamin

    BreakingBenjamin Fapstronaut

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    Hi, Thanks alot.. there are good and bad days but i remind myself to stay positive. And yes, Even after passing 90 days there is still a struggle and little porn cravings.
    The question on whether porn scars our mind or not has no certain answer, because we are the first generation to be affected by it, since our parents didn`t have internet back in the day so they weren`t exposed to 10+ years of addiction like us.
    In my opinion the porn craving it will slowly fade away over the years (if you dont relapse ofcourse).
     
    testwarz and LavaMe like this.
  11. Asgardian36

    Asgardian36 Fapstronaut

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    Dude!!! Fuck! Thats awesome man! I havent even got to 60+ days once yet this aril I was 160 days and then i relapsed We think it is IMPOSSIBLE until it happens!!!
     
  12. montebeta

    montebeta Fapstronaut

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    Can you tell me how you was able to do it , my longest streak was 12 days after 12 days i can't stop myself from watching porn some strange thing start to happen in my body if I abstain myself from watching porn for long term , can you please guide me.
     
  13. montebeta

    montebeta Fapstronaut

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    Can you guide how you are able to stretch so many, I can't last even for 1 week
     
  14. BreakingBenjamin

    BreakingBenjamin Fapstronaut

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    Thanks! 160 days is a respectable achievemnt too :)
    and yes, if someone told the younger me that i could live without porn for more than 30 days i would not believe him LOL.

    You can always stop yourself, its called self control and discipline. Yes, its not easy but its possible.

    There is no easy way out, or a magic solution. When i get urges to watch porn i stop myself. what helps me the most is:
    tapping on my hands and chest to distract the mind from the genetials area
    studying / going to the gym / playing an instrument
    going to the living room or any other place so i wont be isolated
    thinking about something else.. e.g what i`m going to do tomorrow..
     

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