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35 and Older Accountability Group

Discussion in 'Events & Challenges' started by artifact, Nov 24, 2018.

  1. You have been added to the waiting list. It will probably be a couple of months before we have an opening for you in our member ranking. I will tag you in a comment when we do. Watch your alerts.
     
    discovery and JJ_Kino like this.
  2. GottaBFree

    GottaBFree Fapstronaut

    Checking in with a reset

    Dumb

    I’m going to journal in my personal thing soon and spend time reminding myself what “rules” I need to follow and why I need to do this. Not thinking about this regularly leads to me failing.

    Hopefully I can get rededicated and get going on a long term good streak.

    It’s very important to me that I start the new streak strong and that I can look in a mirror and say I’m fighting to make sure I never fall again. I’ve learned some things, but I’m not happy with the current dedication I am showing.

    Tomorrow is a new day. I’m focused on making it 8 hours and getting the day started right tomorrow.
     
    discovery, persona2903 and JJ_Kino like this.
  3. rinpoche-

    rinpoche- Fapstronaut

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    Any interest in doing a 1-1 accountability system? I'm looking to make a shift in my usage for sure.
     
    discovery and JJ_Kino like this.
  4. Son of Midgaard

    Son of Midgaard Fapstronaut

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    Yeah, I will consider it! Waiting a couple of months just to get in makes it easy to degress and fall into old sins again if you rely upon outside support (with lack of in regular life)
     
    discovery likes this.
  5. discovery

    discovery Fapstronaut

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    Waiting a couple of months just to get in is only about being added to the member ranking (of 20) on the first post. Otherwise, you are free to check the board and post and be an active member of this group. Meanwhile, you can check the member ranking and 'be the 21st' by seeing where you would fit in with the others. It really isn't a huge difference at the end of the day. If you look at the groups page, there are some groups that have over 3,000 members. There's no reason to wait to be officially admitted to feel like you belong here. Welcome.
     
    Espi1971, artifact and GottaBFree like this.
  6. Son of Midgaard

    Son of Midgaard Fapstronaut

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  7. discovery

    discovery Fapstronaut

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    Two weeks complete!
    I'm finally feeling like I'm back on track.
    Yesterday I had a moment that could have gone the wrong way. Earlier, I had dug up a little ceramic statue of a mama wolf with two cubs that I had buried somewhere and put it in an obvious place near my bed. I thought to myself in this moment... is this what Wolf2019 is doing right now? (He has the same day count as me). The answer was no. And if on the off chance that he is.. will he give in? The answer was.. most likely not. I also thought about another guy on the site named Bobske who also has the same day count as us. I asked myself the same questions, with the same answers. I snapped out of it and went and did something else. Sure enough, both of those guys are at 14 days. So they WERE doing something else at that moment! I think it's helpful to find someone else on the site who has the same day count as you, and keep them front and center in your mind so that you will try harder to keep up with them. Happy Tuesday everyone.
     
  8. EcoMunchies

    EcoMunchies Fapstronaut

    Day 19, can see how easy it is to fall back to old ways, one small trigger can have you on the edge of a fall so quickly. BUT, resistance remains strong... onwards to 3 weeks complete in a couple of days!!
     
  9. SarahStrong

    SarahStrong Fapstronaut

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    Checking in on Tuesday!!! I am yet holding on!
    I almost thought about it last night. Why? I don't know why. The thought just came across my mind.
    It is very easy to want to go back and fall, but I refused to go back to something that don't fulfilled me or leave me empty at the end. I know one day it is going to get better!!!
     
    artifact and discovery like this.
  10. SarahStrong

    SarahStrong Fapstronaut

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    Never say never!!! The urges will be there, but you must find a way to push pass those urges!!! I received and read great advices from this group. Focus your mind on something productive; workout; think positive; etc. Whatever works for you to keep you on this streak strong and true, do it!!!! You can make it!!! I believe in you! We believe in you! We all need each other to make it through this phase of our lives!
     
    discovery and artifact like this.
  11. SarahStrong

    SarahStrong Fapstronaut

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    Whew!!! Self-acceptance!!! That is a hard pill to swallow because I never looked at myself like that before. This was never my desire in the first place when I was young. Self-acceptance!!! I hate the fact I allow myself to be caught up in something I never desire in my youth life. This desire crept up on me in my adult years and I never thought this will happen to me. I guess I have to learn to look at myself and accept myself in this phase of my life. Love myself no matter how ugly the truth is in my life.
     
  12. Timber

    Timber Fapstronaut

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    Push? I honestly don’t think it’s possible, although I’m sure you can distract yourself for a bit with effort...

    I think the answer is to “not act”. I am learning to simply not respond... the urges wash over me and go away. Let them rage around me. My actions let them rule me. So I don’t act. I think this is what “grace” means, I.e. finding a different sort of strength when I stop pushing.
     
    Last edited: Oct 23, 2019
  13. persona2903

    persona2903 Fapstronaut

    Congrats on your 2 weeks @discovery ! Let's move on, without hurry but without pause.
    Have a good day!
     
    GottaBFree, Timber and discovery like this.
  14. Wolf2019

    Wolf2019 Fapstronaut

    Wow this is powerfully helpful to me this morning. Thank you. Last night I really went through the wringer with temptation but managed to stay standing. Your post is timely to keep me on track today.
     
  15. discovery

    discovery Fapstronaut

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    Thanks persona! Without hurry but without pause. I love it.
    That is awesome to hear Wolf! I'm glad we're helping each other in this way. Keep up the good work. As persona said.. Without hurry but without.. in your case.. paws o_O
     
    persona2903 and Wolf2019 like this.
  16. Circleinthesquare

    Circleinthesquare Fapstronaut

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    Check in Wednesday. Day 1 says it all.
     
    discovery and GottaBFree like this.
  17. I think "practice" is a good way to think about it to. Abstaining from PMO or PM is a mental skill that, like many skills, becomes easy eventually but you have to work hard to get there.
     
  18. 2pres90

    2pres90 Fapstronaut

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    Day 10. Love when I hit the double digits.
     
  19. Timber

    Timber Fapstronaut

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    Yes! Good job! You can do it! 20 days is just around the corner
     
  20. zugish

    zugish Fapstronaut

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    Hey guys,
    haven't been on here for a month or two. Last time I was having trouble abstaining for any real amount of time... I think I was really only half heartedly trying at that point. But now I have about 2 weeks .... maybe a little more? I can't remember exactly when this streak started. I just updated my counter but I estimated.
    I had a pretty significant arm injury and had to have surgery at the end of september... no it wasn't from over-aggressive PM...it was at the gym. But i was kinda pathetic when I was recovering from my surgery... my dominant arm was in a sling and I wasn't supposed to be using it so I was PM with non-dominant and contorting to keep my injured arm elevated and avoiding over-extension. It was a bit ridiculous and though i continued the madness for another week or so, somehow I spontaneously stopped a couple weeks ago and have been doing well since then. I previously had accumulated probably almost 4-5 months once before and relapsed then so I know I have to be careful. I cannot start looking at instagram or other sites that are triggers to go deeper. I even have to be careful with twitter and even linked in cause I always tend to navigate toward triggering images of women. I have tried having sex with my wife twice over the last 2 weeks and the first time I wasn't able to finish. Sometimes in the past having sex without O led me to porn or sometimes led me to be overly critical of my wife and to get into fights with her but somehow I managed to be good this time. Then we did it again about a week later and it was easy for me to finish.
    Anyway, the posts on this thread have been helpful to me and wanted to thank you all for posting. I will try to keep an eye on here and hopefully keep this streak going.
     
    Espi1971, 2pres90, Wolf2019 and 2 others like this.

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