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Double Standard for Male Victims of Molestation

Discussion in 'Off-topic Discussion' started by Deleted Account, Feb 11, 2020.

  1. Such a great video, and an issue I've been passionate about for a long time.

    People. Please, PLEASE STOP perpetuating the idea that male victims of sexual abuse from older females should feel "lucky." Stop with the BS jokes of "where was she when I was in high school, har har." If you are perpetuating this belief, you are hurting these young boys who are going to experience a lot of trauma. You're making it harder for them to speak out and get help for what they went through, because like so many things in life, young boys are taught that they need to just suck it up and deal with it on their own. Or in this case, they're taught that they should feel happy about it, and if they don't then there's something wrong with them.

    This crap is disgusting. Just please stop. And watch this great video.

     
  2. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    Incels envy those guys.
     
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  3. No, they don't. People don't envy rape victims. Not if they actually knew the crap they went through and how it will effect them for years to come.

    This is exactly the kind of comment I'm talking about. Rape is nothing to be envious of.
     
  4. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    My point is that there are people who will never see rape as what it is. They see it as just another way of having sex.
     
    fg4795 likes this.
  5. Yeah, I get what you're saying.
     
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  6. Jackb97

    Jackb97 Fapstronaut

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    Ngl I wish my RE teacher mollested me when I was in highschool.
    I remeber hoping it would happen in detentions.
    Obviosly I knew it was unlikely that a hot 30 year old teacher was gonna bang a 13 year old me.
     
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  7. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    I've been there. But we failed to realize at the moment that "Molestation" means we don't like it.
     
    fg4795 likes this.
  8. Cool, so in the very thread where I'm urging men to stop perpetuating this horrible, harmful idea, people are already doing exactly that.

    This world makes me sad sometimes. Some people will just never learn.
     
  9. gordie

    gordie Fapstronaut

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    What age group are we talking about for "rape" or "molestation" for young boys? Also, men respond differently to sex at younger ages and it simply isn't the same. I honestly don't think a teacher having sex with a 15 year old boy is that bad, honestly older women have been some of the greatest sexual and relationship mentors I've ever had. I don't think it's a double standard to say an older man having sex with a 15 year old female student is creepier than the same scenario with genders flipped. The seduction, interaction, purpose, and act are all completely different.
     
  10. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    I think it is less about age and more about being not confortable/be forced.
     
  11. It literally doesn't matter. Rape is rape. But legally, in my state, people under the age of 18 are not capable of consent, as per the law. It's statutory rape for an older woman to have sex with a 17 year old boy, or younger. Most of the victims mentioned in this video were younger than that.

    Well, you're flat out wrong. Did you even watch the video? Boys who have been abused by older women have major issues later in life because of that. Even the ones who thought it was cool and fine at the time. You're just speaking out of complete ignorance here. I'm sorry, but your opinion goes against actual facts. Actual victims have spoken out, time and time again, about how that ruined their lives, even when they were all for it at the time. All you have to do is listen to male victims to know you are wrong.

    That's just... so so completely wrong. It's not different at all. It's just as creepy. You are deluded.
     
    fg4795 likes this.
  12. https://1in6.org/get-information/myths/

    Myth #6:
    The myth that if a female used or abused a boy, he was “lucky,” and if he doesn’t feel that way there’s something wrong with him.

    "premature, coerced or otherwise abusive or exploitive sexual experiences are never positive – whether they are imposed by an older sister, sister of a friend, baby sitter, neighbor, aunt, mother, or any other female in a position of power over a boy. At a minimum, they cause confusion and insecurity. They almost always harm boys’ and men’s capacities for trust and intimacy."

    "Being sexually used or abused, whether by males or females, can cause a variety of other emotional and psychological problems. However, boys and men often don’t recognize the connections between what happened and their later problems. To be used as a sexual object by a more powerful person, male or female, is never a good thing, and can cause lasting harm."
     
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  13. gordie

    gordie Fapstronaut

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    I mean, you're on some kind of crusade on these forums about equalizing male/ female abuse. I think there are points to be made but I think these interactions are far more nuanced. Female psychological abuse is horrendous but is not nearly as life-threatening as male physical abuse. Women, in seduction, prey on different male instincts than males play on female instincts. I just don't believe you can look at male/female interactions as singular things, but you seem to be raging all over the place about right and wrong in these scenarios.
     
    kropo82 likes this.
  14. Geez louise, for the first time in months I post a couple threads, and now I'm "on a crusade"? Stop being a drama queen.

    I never claimed psychological abuse was as life-threatening as physical abuse.

    This is so ridiculous. Feminists rage 24/7 about women's rights. I post two threads about men's rights, and suddenly I'm "raging all over the place"? Again, stop being a drama queen.

    Sorry if you think I'm wrong somehow for caring about male victims and wanting justice for them, and wanting their abuse to be taken seriously. I'm not gonna apologize for it. It's serious stuff and it needs to be talked about more. If you don't give a crap about it, fine. But don't expect me to shut up about something that I find important just because you don't like me "raging" (talking) about it "all over the place" (in three threads).
     
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  15. Actually, you know what, I'm not even gonna take this as a negative thing. I hardly think two threads is a crusade, but if I am on a crusade about equalizing male and female abuse, good. Sounds great to me. They should be treated equally.
     
  16. I really didn't want to answer because I prefer not to engage in too many discussions but you know this is a bullshit too big to be ignored.
    1) 15 years old, how in the world it can be a good things?
    2)She was his teacher. Even if they were both of legal age it would be wrong, if you're the teacher you can't have sex with students. period. It is forbidden also in the university where they are 20+ years. You just can't.
    But most important:
    3) They didn't have sex. She molested him. Do you get the difference? Everybody had a crush on some teacher. I would be lying if I said I didn't. But it was a crush.Did I wanted to have sex with her.? Of course but, me, willing. Her, willing. Here, her, molesting. Him, life ruined. If you can't get the difference it is sad but it is real this:
     
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  17. Ruttigan

    Ruttigan Fapstronaut

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    Having personally experienced this when I was a kid I can say first hand it was traumatic. It wasn't a woman though, it was a grown man who was baby sitting me. Regardless though it messed up my sexuality royally.
     
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  18. I'm so sorry that happened to you :( I hope you're finding the healing and support you need.
     
  19. Ruttigan

    Ruttigan Fapstronaut

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    :) Thanks for the sympathy Castielle. I guess it doesn't bother me much any more. It wasn't my fault, and probably not the guy's fault either (any one who has a compulsion to diddle seven year old boys' ding-dongs probably doesn't have control over their actions). I'm not bitter about it or anything. I'm not holding any grudges. Shit happens, everyone's got some shit to deal with, this is my own personal ladle of shit.

    That being said, I can't ignore that it deeply influenced my life. It turned on my sex drive at a very early age and started my obsessive thinking about girls and sex which I still struggle with today. I'm hoping that being here and going through a reboot will help me deal with these issues.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  20. Oh yeah, for sure. I've heard similar things from other people with those experiences. It's definitely not the way things are meant to happen. I'm glad you have a good spirit about it, though. Good luck with your reboot <3
     

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