35 and Older Accountability Group

Good stuff. Whatever gets the job done. 3 days wheels up!

 

Just wanted to share something I started in this past week that has been very helpful. I'm not Muslim, but I decided to incorporate and modify the Muslim tradition of praying 5 times a day. For me, it's not praying exactly, but more like taking a few minutes (or more) to talk to my spirit guides about whatever is on my mind. Doing it 5 times a day really helps keep you spirituality focused. If you don't believe in a spiritual power, you can still talk to forces that no one can deny exist- such as nature, love, peace, etc. They are all as real as gravity.

 

Checking in. I've had a real struggle as of late, but I've only given in a couple times the past two weeks. It's everything else. I've been agitated and just no motivation to praying and meditating and doing the the things that help my mind. I have been good with the gym going 6 days a week the past 3 weeks, which definitely helps, it's that other side that discovery talks about above that's missing. It is necessary for me: my problem isn't porn, it's my mind. Everything else, including porn, is just a symptom.

 

Reset today. Curse of the post sex chaser. Onwards and upwards!

 

I have read the rules and would like to join this group

 

Start again.

 

I have read the rules and would like to join this group.

 

Check in at 8 days.

I’m sticking to basics. 1/2 day at a time.

It’s worth the fight!

congrats on 100 @discovery!

 

Gracias amigo! And congrats to you as well, you've got the ball rolling on a new streak!

 

I am sensing a rant coming on!

I too had sex recently. I find that since I started to avoid PM, the pleasure from sexual experience became less pronounced. I feel it physiologically but I don’t get to giddy heights, not usually.

I think this is reasonable. Ultimately, pleasure is something elusive and not tied to a particular experience. It leaves you looking for more because it is so fleeting. The problem is, you can’t recreate it with the same experience... you have to search elsewhere every time. With PM, you can up the ante in search for more pleasure in ways that are more efficient than real life.

The solution has to be this: just don’t search for it. If it comes unbidden, welcome it. If it doesn’t, enjoy the closeness and fellowship of your partner.
That’s why @Bogo Biggins is on the money with his motto, “no pleasures are worth taking, they only have value when they are freely given”.

The truth of nofap is that there’s so much more to life!

 

Celebrating today. Since starting NoFap the longest streak I've had is 17 days. I hit 18 today. It feels good. It feels better and a longer-lasting sense of satisfaction than PMO, like the difference between eating a hearty meal with vegetables and steak instead of a handful of candy. I'd appreciate prayers or positive vibes or whatever to keep this going.

 

Yes! And hey, nothing wrong with candy - let’s not go crazy

 

Totally agree.

What is pleasure? Well, it isn't something we have a right too - that's for sure. We may earn it, yes, by genuinely loving another person. But can we just take real, meaningful pleasure (including sexual pleasure) - absolutely no way IMHO!

 

That's a feeling to remember and use it to motivate yourself . keep it up!

 

I think I’m adopting your motto with one tiny change “no pleasures are worth PURSUING”

 

Day one. 48 years old. Giving up drinking today too. Whoooo!!!!

 

Today is a difficult day , thoughts like ,"maybe i should just check what's new" or "i should relapse now so i start a new streak" were on my mind the last few hours.And generally i find it difficult to motivate myself to find something else to do.
What is so strange is that i didn't have such strong erges on my last 2 relpases.
The triggers were a few photoes on FB and a sexual energy coming out after my workout with weights today.I am almost sure, if i had some weed around the relapse would be almost inevitable.

I am typing this here just to make sure i am gonna keep myslef on track...

 

Tuesday check in....