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No symptoms

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Rusty Gull, Apr 8, 2020.

  1. Rusty Gull

    Rusty Gull Fapstronaut

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    I'm on day 6 of hardmode, and I'm completely clean-no p/subs or anything. I've been trying rebooting for over an year now, but this time I have absolutely no symptoms. I'm confused, please help.
     
    Gmork likes this.
  2. Rusty Gull

    Rusty Gull Fapstronaut

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    All my previous reboots involved intense urges, headaches, or flatline by this point. This is one of the few times I've come this far without so much as a peek, but I've gone 3-4 months without MO before, and even then I had urges for P. I'm confused because I'm not experiencing any of the expected withdrawal symptoms. I have zero urges to watch P, except when I'm really bored, and even then, it's not really an urge; just a fleeting thought that it's a possibility to alleviate the boredom.
     
  3. Rusty Gull

    Rusty Gull Fapstronaut

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    But it makes me feel like I'm not making progress. It's kind of like how unless you feel sore after a workout, you don't feel like you've done anything
     
  4. Rusty Gull

    Rusty Gull Fapstronaut

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    Kind of, I'm prone to overthinking
     
    Gmork likes this.
  5. Rusty Gull

    Rusty Gull Fapstronaut

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  6. Rusty Gull

    Rusty Gull Fapstronaut

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    Ok, so I relapsed a couple of times, but I'm back to day 10. Similar to last time, there's not a lot of withdrawal symptoms. The only thing I can see is that I'm not feeling great, in general. Got a sort of constricting feeling in my chest, and I'm not very happy most of the time. The feeling is always there, except when I'm talking to someone over the phone, or I'm really engrossed in something. I occasionally feel like there's a lot of emotions bottled up inside me, and I don't know how to let them out. It feels like shit.
    I want to know that there is something good beyond all this suffering; not because I need a reason to continue, but because I really need reassurance that I'm not doing this in vain.
    P.S. Cold showers feel great, they help take my mind off the shitty feelings
     
    Last edited: Apr 24, 2020
    Gmork likes this.
  7. Rusty Gull

    Rusty Gull Fapstronaut

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    I want to know how long it will take for my dopamine receptors to reset. The last time it happened within 2 months, not sure of the exact number of days.
    I want to know that I'm not going to feel this shitty for the rest of my life. I feel useless, and incapable of accomplishing anything worthwhile.
    I want to know that I can change. I don't want to go through life with something to hide.
    I want to grow. I want to become a better person, who can deal with his issues.
     
    Gmork likes this.
  8. Nexes

    Nexes Fapstronaut

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    This is exactly your brain design as you keep on doing same thing again and again your brain get use to it like you fapping daily your plesure come done so many thing....as you keep on doing nofap your thresholds extending....same se happening with me bro
     
    Gmork likes this.
  9. Rusty Gull

    Rusty Gull Fapstronaut

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    It's been over 15 days, and I'm still feeling the same. I'm kind of proud of myself for not relapsing, but apart from that I don't feel great. I'm not in flatline either, I often have spontaneous erections, and even on the rare occasion I see something arousing, I get erect.
    If anyone else has experienced something similar, please help. I'm really confused and could use some reassurance
     
    Gmork likes this.
  10. Rusty Gull

    Rusty Gull Fapstronaut

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    Relapsed.. Started with reading manga which eventually led to almost 2 hours of p-subs, leading to P and then MO a few hours later. Felt worse after than I did before. But I like the idea of starting a new streak at the start of a new month, so I'm resetting my counter. Hopefully this was the last time.
     
    Gmork likes this.
  11. Rusty Gull

    Rusty Gull Fapstronaut

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    So I lost it again on the 3rd, but I'm back on track now.
     
    Gmork likes this.
  12. Rusty Gull

    Rusty Gull Fapstronaut

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    I was fantasizing about what it would feel like to get a bj, this morning. It felt really good, but I stopped after a bit. I'm tired of having to start all over again. I know that eventually I need to get over this addiction, and I'll have to go through these shitty feelings at some point. I hate that I keep sabotaging my progress, and I don't want to have anything to hide.
    That's the reason I'm doing this, I want to be able to live life without having anything to hide. I want to be perfectly honest about myself, and this habit is not letting me do it.
     

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