HOCD morphed into TOCD.

So I kinda have the same problem with hocd. Right now I’m having these thought constantly but you must stay away from pmo so you can start establishing your self identity in who you really are. Things are still very raw and going though the motions is very challenging. Pm coulds your thinking and suppresses your feeling. Message me if you want to talk.

 

HOCD is a made-up condition. For some reason, conservatives in the United States have a difficult time admitting that being gay normal.

Therefore, the conservatives have created a fake condition they refer to as HOCD. The most important part of the bigots that created this anacronym is the "D". So, it's not just being normal and being gay, it's a "D" - a Disorder.

I'm straight, have always been straight. I have family members who are gay and they do not have a Disorder.

Please, do not buy into the United States conservative marketing ploy that is homophobic and bigoted.

If you are straight, you are straight. No amount of watching any sort of P can make you gay.

The constant gay-bashing on NoFap is evil and needs to stop. The first place it needs to stop is making sure everyone knows that HOCD is a made-up term and that it was made up to give homophobia and gay-bashing a pseudo-scientific cover that homophobia does not deserve.

 

The only thing that is ignorant is the belief that being gay is a Disorder. Yes, OCD is real. But adding an H to the front of OCD and attempting to hide your bigoted and homophobic beliefs behind it doesn't make it real.

Putting the label of HOCD on a normal gay person is harmful and leads people to hate themselves.

Link: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-truth-about-exercise-addiction/201710/why-are-suicide-rates-higher-among-lgbtq-youth

The bashing of gay people - including teens - by homophobic bigots contributes to that increase in teen suicide.

NoFap needs to stop allowing its site to be used to gay bash.

The NoFap mission statement says: : "NoFap® is a comprehensive sexual health platform. We’re here to help you quit porn, improve your relationships, and reach your sexual health goals. Science-based, secular, and sex-positive."

Calling being gay HOCD is a direct contradiction to that mission statement. There is nothing Science-based, secular nor sex-positive about hiding homophobia behind the term HOCD.

If anyone reading this is straight and has viewed gay P, it doesn't make you gay. If you are straight, you are straight. Don't let bigots on the site sway you into a belief of HOCD because HOCD is made up.

 

A few years back, I was constantly feeling down, had mood swings, felt like shit. I did some research and became convinced I suffered from a mental illness, be it bipolar disorder, some form of personality disorder, depression, or even autism. It actually turned out I was just type 1 diabetic and my negative feelings were caused by blood sugar fluctuations. I got treatment and started to feel better within less than a month. Eight or nine months on I basically feel fine.

I bring this up because while its obviously a different context, you are doing the same thing I did; misinterpreting the information you have and unwittingly going down the wrong path because you are being influenced. Meanwhile the answer is so obvious that your brain wont let you see it. The answer is, you have a fetish. Thats it, thats literally it. You consumed a fuck load of porn that has warped your brain and made it dependent on a certain type of porn, and its led you to think something so ridiculous as being trans. Except, you dont actually think that, you even basically say so when you say you are happy as a man, you are answering your own questions without realising it and the porn induced hysteria and despair is making you doubt yourself. I dont say this to be harsh, but its like you say in your own profile message, you need to take a step back and realise how stupid this whole thing is.

 

Regardless of your identity. Your life should depend on pmo to make such decisions in your life. Suppress your addiction to allow you to find you identity. Stop focusing on your ocd and start focusing on the addiction.

Often times. The addiction messes with your brain to compensate for the p you’re avoiding giving you the ocd. That’s what’s happening to me.

 

I feel like I need to address this because a lot of what you have said is wrong.

This is absolute nonsense. OCD is a legitimate mental disorder and HOCD is a subset of that. Someone with OCD traits can fixate on literally anything, it doesnt have to be sexual, doesnt even have to make logical sense, its just the way the disorder operates. To claim the existence of a mental disorder is due to conservatism is laughable.

The "Disorder" part of "Homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder" relates to the obsessive compulsion being a disorder, it doesnt mean that being homosexual is a disorder.

OP is from the UK, those dastardly conservatives must sure have a good PR team if they are managing to work their magic across an entire ocean! Nah but seriously, where in the post was OP homophobic or bigoted?

OP never said that he wasn't straight, he said he was suffering with HOCD. Excessive porn consumption and fetishism has led to this.

I ask once again, where in his original post was OP "gay bashing" or being bigoted in any serious way? I'll answer that for you as I'm clearly being rhetorical, he wasn't at all. I'm not sure how anything you even posted is supposed to help him considering his post was about autogynephilia, which is a completely different ballpark entirely.

 

100% Agree with everything you both said. I can't understand if the guy is just ignorat asf or just a troll.
That nonsence is the last thing that HOCD sufferers need to see.

There's nothing Homophobic in HOCD. It's the extreme fear and endless 24/7 thoughts of being something you just deeply inside know you're not.
I suffered from HOCD as well. It's terrible and it's a living hell. seeing posts here about saying that it's not real is just painful to watch. Many here are suffering from this terrible thing and posts like this might make their anxiety much worse.
I have nothing against gays, My brother is gay and I support the LGBTQ community.

1 year ago we encountered the same nonesence in this post:
https://forum.nofap.com/index.php?threads/having-hocd-read-this.234156/
Basically the thread opener had the same ideology as @DrabToLight
I suggest you and every Hocd sufferer out there to read the wonderful comments by @AtomicTango @Pexton
@Avenger21 @ivanhoe and @Invincible Under The Sun.

 

If you feel regret from cumming then it's sexual masochism which isn't the same as being trans. I have a method that might work for this. Please PM me.

 

Well I don't know much about Autogynephilia, maybe you could have Gender Dysphoria, which is a serious problem, these people have so much hate towards their gender that they hate their coarse voice, they hate the hair growing in the arms and legs, they pretty much hate everything about their gender, that they are in a constant dilemma to transition which might even lead to suicides But,
There could also be a chance that this could be another paraphilic disorder like the one you mentioned Autogynephilia. For instance if you read my story, you can get the idea that I watch the porn mainly bdsm, but I imagine myself in their position like being subjected to whatever those women are going through. Even when I get these urges, usually every guy would touch their penis, but my hand first goes to my nipples. Many times even I used to be in a constant thought process like- I am comfortable with dressing up as male, but I do hate my penis, maybe I could get a surgery and get it cut off and live as a male (as I don't like cross dressing), as such thoughts have come up at some point, but I was so much obsessed with bdsm lifestyle that I forgot that I used to have these thoughts.

Well what I want to say is, the thing you mentioned earlier:

Quit porn, let your mind think rationally, things shown in Porn is wrong and they make you delusional. If it is a paraphilia, then like I mentioned in my other post; https://forum.nofap.com/index.php?t...-one-year-of-nofap.272778/page-2#post-2495998 ; It would take around 5 years or even more like someone mentioned.

Well since you mentioned that these feelings were somewhat recent ones, so I guess they might be porn induced, so they would come under paraphilia like you mentioned, which is curable and you need not be obsessed with the thoughts about ruining you family at 40's.

P.s: I am giving trigger warning ahead itself but incase you want to check out my story: https://forum.nofap.com/index.php?t...by-trying-to-make-a-fantasy-a-reality.271925/

Edit: It seems it takes about 2 months to get rid of the idea, but I'm sure you would get thoughts arising at some point of time later, but if you are able to stay out of it for 5 years, then it means you are will be free from it.

 

You're confusing this with the dsm remission rate for paraphilic disorders. It takes about 2 months at the most to get rid of fetish. With my method it should only take a couple of weeks.

 

Oh ok, yeah at the end of the day, I want to say is, it is curable and shouldn't be feared that this would affect in later stage of life.

 

I want to put it down to ignorance and not malice but regardless I get annoyed when I read posts like this because of how potentially harmful they are. I dont normally get so openly combative or at least try not to, but I mean, OP is here asking for help, from a position of desperation and anxiety, and the second answer he gets is someone just telling him to "stop using bigoted terms" and not really addressing what he asked? I take issue with that.

This is the crux of it right here; HOCD is just another form of OCD, and people only take issue with the "H" part of it because it is still a politicised aspect of our society. In that regard I kinda understand why people might think HOCD is made up, but its all too easy to do the research yourself and realise its not, and that it is just one of many sexuality related obsessive compulsive disorders. No-one but the most ignorant of people would say normal OCD isnt real, and OCD can apply to anything, ergo HOCD is real. Simple as.

I remember that thread, hard to believe it was nearly a full year ago. I said the same thing then I'm saying now.

To be fair to the OP of that thread, I dont think he was trolling or saying HOCD wasnt real, I explained that a lot of people misuse the terminology and he agreed saying that is probably what he did. It was one of the guys underneath the OP that came across as being ignorant.

 

Catastrophic thinking patterns are a clear sign of someone with a mental health issue, its good that you acknowledge you have them. Remember this when you get urges in future that it is literally your brain trying to pressure you into accepting its own irrationality.

Allow me to let you in a little secret.

The people on those sites and sub-reddits get off, literally get off sexually, on the idea of feminising men. Its sick and disgusting and immoral but they do. There was a story a year or so back about a Discord server that took in men with a crossdressing fetish, manipulated them into sending pictures of themselves in female clothing, and then blackmailed them into taking HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy) pills otherwise they would send the pictures to their friends and family. The owner of that Discord openly spoke about capturing a man and keeping them as a sex slave they would slowly force to "enjoy" what was happening to them. Like I say its absolutely awful but its true. There are also instances of these people pressuring and practically bullying some YouTubers I know of into thinking they were trans simply because they were gay and were somewhat effeminate. No matter how many times the YouTubers would say "I'm not trans, I dont think I'm a girl, I'm just a gay guy who likes to dress up as characters from games I like, its not sexual, leave me alone" these people would not have it. They have an agenda to push and they dont care whos lives they ruin.

Not saying you directly interacted with someone like that, 99.9% chance you didn't but I tell the story regardless because thats the mindset of some of these people. A lot of people claim to have gender dysphoria or claim others have it when in reality they just get a thrill out of the idea of being a woman. Newsflash to these people; actual women arent aroused by their own breasts, just like I'm not turned on by the sight of my own penis.

Your brain is addicted to novelty, thats all it is. I guarantee you that if you were to go a good length of time without watching any porn or actively engaging in any fantasy, you would return to a place of relative normalcy and be attracted to normal women again. I know it because I did it. I've slipped up a lot recently, just look at my counter the last month or so lol, but we are all in this together. HOCD or not, we are all in this together.

 

Look up "sexual masochism disorder" fool.

 

See, from the reply you gave me, you already have you answer. You used to love your masculinity more but it slowly changed with porn abuse. Well I know this is hard and would take some time, but if you stop watching porn and do nofap, I'm sure your brain would return to being normal just like how it was before. They say brain has neuroplastic nature which means when you repeated try to brainwash it, it becomes something else, but you can again bring it back to original state.

All you need is to try. There is a saying, test things hold onto good. I am not saying transition is a bad thing, but it is a pain in ass, when you don't even have gender disphoria. I mean think about this way, once you change you gender your whole environment changes, the way people act towards you change (I mean people might not treat you badly, but they would treat you in different way, you would think that it doesn't matter but deep down it would hurt), I don't know much about your country, but here in my country, trans people aren't allowed in all jobs (again discrimination), you don't even know if you would get a life partner

And finally the most important point, what if you regret your decision, generally paraphilic people have a distress after indulging in activity. What if you feel bad about everything, you didn't want it that way, and there seems like no turning back cos people might laugh at taking a decision which you don't even know if it is right for you. With all these thoughts, like every depressed guy, you end up doing stuff which is irreversible.

When, you can get your life back in control by doing nofap for just few months, why think unnecessarily about something you don't even know might happen 40 years later.

Take a deep breath, leave all the things you are doing, when there is a happy way of life ahead of you with Nofap, don't try the difficult path my friend....

Good luck, stay strong. Peace