The START 2021 STRONGER Challenge [CLOSED]

Jefe Rojo · Oct 13, 2020

Steppingintotheunkown said: ↑

Iv relapsed again. Chatrooms. Another strike please @BrohkenCompass
Iv finally got my child friendly phone up and running with restrictions that another person can control. The first phone I got the other day was faulty, so this meant I had to keep my phone with no restrictions on for emergencies. I spent hours in chatrooms. The other night I was in chatrooms till 6am. I'm not blaming the broken phone, I'm not blaming the people who sold me the phone, I'm not blaming anything outside myself. I accept 100% responsibility for my relapse. My unrestricted phone has gone, Iv smashed it up in pure rage. A peice of metal and glass can bring me so much pain.
Knowing someone else now has a passcode so I can't go into these chatrooms makes me feel calm.

Now I just want to move on and make this past week history. It's been awful. Chatrooms suck the life out of me.
Click to expand...

I once took the internet modem card out of my computer and snapped it in half because I was so disgusted in myself. You’re making important changes right now. Overcoming P takes an extraordinary amount of effort and sometimes our most drastic efforts are the things that end up freeing us. Keep up the good work!

Ian Of Freelandia · Oct 13, 2020

Experiencing strongest urges by far that I have yet this streak.
Definitely feel foggy headed, almost like I'm in a dream.
It's alright.
Glad to be in this group. Reminds me to be a good team member and leader.

The task is simple. Stay away from porn and masturbation.
Really, everything else is okay.
I will stay clean.

Day 21.

Jefe Rojo · Oct 13, 2020

Ian Of Freelandia said: ↑

Experiencing strongest urges by far that I have yet this streak.
Definitely feel foggy headed, almost like I'm in a dream.
It's alright.
Glad to be in this group. Reminds me to be a good team member and leader.

The task is simple. Stay away from porn and masturbation.
Really, everything else is okay.
I will stay clean.

Day 21.
Click to expand...

You’ve got this. You’ll be so glad that you stayed strong.

Teutão · Oct 13, 2020

Day 20.

My Best self · Oct 13, 2020

Day 18

Schia · Oct 14, 2020

Ian Of Freelandia said: ↑

The task is simple. Stay away from porn and masturbation.
Really, everything else is okay.
I will stay clean.
Click to expand...

Just because it is simple, doesn’t mean it is easy. Especially at the stage you are at right now. You’re doing great!

Meanwhile, I’m on day 47, and I’m too busy for PMO. Which is a dangerous situation, because of the stress, but I’m also thinking I’m in the process of resetting, which is nice. But it will only happen if I keep on top of it. Always be ready to keep the PMO wolves from the door.

Steppingintotheunkown · Oct 14, 2020

Jefe Rojo said: ↑

I once took the internet modem card out of my computer and snapped it in half because I was so disgusted in myself. You’re making important changes right now. Overcoming P takes an extraordinary amount of effort and sometimes our most drastic efforts are the things that end up freeing us. Keep up the good work!
Click to expand...

Thanks @Jefe Rojo, yes I have similar feelings of disgusted. It brings me so much pain it needs to be destroyed. There is no putting away in a box, or keep it downstairs away from my room. That wouldn't work for me. I feel free today

Deleted Account · Oct 14, 2020

Day 4 Check in!

Deleted Account · Oct 14, 2020

Steppingintotheunkown said: ↑

Now I just want to move on and make this past week history. It's been awful. Chatrooms suck the life out of me.
Click to expand...

I feel you man. Spent a whole day jerking off to porn all because something I saw kept nagging at my addict to get that x rated version and take a hit... feel the rush.

The next day, my balls ached, I was so angry and irritated by everything and everyone. Just a monster of a person. I could see myself though....aware of the difference from acting out and peacefully abiding by my own intentions.

Go back to living by your intentions.

Deleted Account · Oct 14, 2020

BrohkenCompass said: ↑

I feel you man. Spent a whole day jerking off to porn all because something I saw kept nagging at my addict to get that x rated version and take a hit... feel the rush.

The next day, my balls ached, I was so angry and irritated by everything and everyone. Just a monster of a person. I could see myself though....aware of the difference from acting out and peacefully abiding by my own intentions.

Go back to living by your intentions.
Click to expand...

Please remove my name from the competition thank you.

Deleted Account · Oct 14, 2020

I relapsed yesterday I'm out from this challenge
But thanks for letting me join this. I've learned a lot from this. BTW Can You please make a no tier because I'm getting better at this due to the challenge. This will help me a lot

Deleted Account · Oct 14, 2020

Day 19. I try to keep myself as busy as possible, not stay at home unless i have something particular to do.Since I started coming to this forum, I have completed some important tasks that i have been putting off for a long time.
I now firmly believe that having support mechanisms (this forum) will create a difference in my battle against this addiction. I am so thankful to all of you for being here for me.

Ian Of Freelandia · Oct 14, 2020

Sifo-Dyas said: ↑

Urges will never be completely gone. You just have to get better at anticipating an minimizing them when they occur.
Click to expand...

Jefe Rojo said: ↑

You’ve got this. You’ll be so glad that you stayed strong.
Click to expand...

Schia said: ↑

Just because it is simple, doesn’t mean it is easy. Especially at the stage you are at right now. You’re doing great!

Meanwhile, I’m on day 47, and I’m too busy for PMO. Which is a dangerous situation, because of the stress, but I’m also thinking I’m in the process of resetting, which is nice. But it will only happen if I keep on top of it. Always be ready to keep the PMO wolves from the door.
Click to expand...

Thanks guys.
I did make it through. And am very glad I did.

Stay in there.

Day 22

tonyk1982 · Oct 14, 2020

Deleted Account said: ↑

I have been asked to repost the following in its own thread. At this moment of writing I am 499 days without PMO and the follow is a list of some things I did/do to keep on the straight and narrow:

It's true that PMO is 'all in the head', and it would be great if there was just a way to change one's mind and leave it all behind - BUT it is hard-wired in the form of neural pathways that have to break down [and remain broken down] if PMO is to become a thing of the past.

[1] The first step, after deciding that you really want to quit PMO, is to give yourself a reason to quit beyond 'feeling bad'. You might try imaging life in five years time: five with PMO and five without. In the five years with PMO scenario you might imagine yourself having changed nothing, gained nothing, and regretting not having done anything. In the five years without PMO you might imagine yourself as a better, healthier person, happy to be five years PMO free.
This positive image of your future self is important.

[2] The second step is optional - but I think it is good. It is optional because it may only work if you have some sort of religious background, and it involves discussion/confession with a cleric from your church/synagogue/temple etc. Essentially, admitting your error to such a person, stating that you are now on the way to recovery, and seeking advice in confidence, is [a] partly why those people took that job and they will be happy to help and , it puts your recovery on a serious level. I think a lot of NoFap attempts fail because people [I was one] say NO MORE - but only to themselves. A PMO-free life is to improve REAL LIFE, and telling a real life person that you have quit and want guidance is a good thing to do. It also has the effect of making the decision to quit REAL and not a whim after some shabby PMO episode. An accountability partner could also help - or an accountability group. Just be careful that people with the same issue don't start making excuses for one another - nor you for them.

[3] DELETE IT ALL. Every single movie, gif, jpeg - the lot - ALL of it. It goes. DELETE DELETE DELETE. Seriously, recovering alcoholics do not keep vodka in the house. There are two reasons for this - that was the first one. The second is that you will NEVER look at it again anyway. That is your attitude to it. 'I won't be needing this again'. BOOM! Trashed - all of it. Do it in one massive burn-out, a napalming of your P reserves. It all goes, and it will NEVER be replaced. You might not need step [2] above - but you need this step 100%

[4] BLOCK PMO sites. I used K9 with the password deliberately lost to prevent unlocking it. I also have an adblocker and a program that limits time on a website. Should I have missed anything with K9, I can add them to the time-limiter and set the time limit to its lowest [a few seconds], then the site is blocked for the next 24 hours. When blocking sites, use keywords to block potential problem sites. On my PC, no newspaper article discussing P is accessible if the address contains the word P. Same with a lot of other 'trigger' words. Once done, parts of the internet your addiction draws you too will be closed. And adult sites includes chat, dating, craigslist, ANYTHING COMPROMISING.

[5] Another option, but a good one: Ditch the smartphone. Really. Step back in time with a flip-phone that is only good for calls and texts. If anyone asks, point to certain celebrities who have already done this in order to get away from the 'noise' of the internet. You are opting for less tech in your life - you are ahead of the curve. That's all they need to know, and your mental health is more important than their fashion sense. Your unused smartphone can be traded in or sealed away in a box/envelope as an emergency phone when travelling etc. But cut it out of your life.

[6] Get an education. PMO is the product of an abusive industry and your involvement in it helps keep it going. There are many good books written by good journalists out there about P and how it ruins lives. You don't need to be an expert, but you do need to wise up to the effects of what is seen by some as acceptable. It isn't, and not just for moral reasons - it damages esteem, mental health, and lives, and not only of the users. There are TED talks on this, some by authors of good books.

[7] Fill up your time with something positive - PMO wastes time. What are you going to do now with all that time? Take up any of the following: exercise, an art, a language, an instrument, go out more - you can go out in order to pursue a hobby: language meet-ups, music classes, gyms or bootcamps. But DO SOMETHING.

[8] Have an emergency plan. PMO urges can strike anywhere. Have some quick easy thing to do when they strike. This can be as easy as going for a walk, to calling a friend to arrange going out for a pint or a gig, doing some shopping, cooking a meal from scratch - or even just making tea/coffee, or some impromtu cabin exercises. But KNOW THE URGE and TAKE ACTION. E.g. if you feel the urge in bed, recognise it and GET OUT OF BED. You'll be surprised how quick an urge goes when circumstances change.

[9] Don't be too tough on yourself. There are lots of guys here called 'Fight-Wolf' or 'Thor-Warrior' or 'strong-whatever' and while it is good to have a positive image of yourself, that image should not be a cartoon. You need a realistic vision of yourself as a functioning human being. This site also has women struggling with PMO and it is notable how they do not invent superhero images for themselves, but simply want to be better versions of themselves. If you're a guy, be red-blodded, but that comes with a LOT of self-respect, and consideration for yourself. ALWAYS REMEMBER: you are becoming better by leaving the burden of PMO behind. The world can be blessed with that better version of you if you keep on the path of no-PMO.

[10] Treat PMO and its ilk with UTTER CONTEMPT. Stop thinking of it as a temptation and start seeing it as pathetic garbage. Hate it. Find the many good reasons to hate it. Ruin any chance there might be of 'befriending ' it again. Set yourself high above it as you take you proper place as a decent, skilled, confident person. See PMO for what it is - someone else's bullshit - but not yours. Not any more. You are free, and free for a reason.

I wish whoever reads this very good luck. PMO is no fun and breaking the cycle can be tough, so you have to be strict. The addiction is literally fused into the neural pathways in your brain, so leaving P is vital to allow these pathways to become stale and wither from lack of use. There is a lot of info out there on how this pathway operates.
But fundamentally, whoever you are, and wherever you are from, you were not born to wind up in the clutches of PMO. This is your one, unlikely chance of life - don't risk losing out by giving yourself to PMO. You know you want to quit, so why not? Say to yourself: I AM NOT THE KIND OF PERSON WHO PMOs - and that is the truth.
As of now, you are PMO free - just keep it that way.
Click to expand...

I saw this elsewhere on this site and thought it was really good so re-posted here.

Teutão · Oct 14, 2020

Day 21, three weeks:

In Flanders Fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark or place; and in the sky
The larks still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt daw, saw sunset glow
Loved and were loved, and now we lie,
In Flanders fields

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The Torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppoies grow
In Flanders fields.

-John McCrae (1915, Europe)

Jefe Rojo · Oct 14, 2020

Teutão said: ↑

Day 21, three weeks:

In Flanders Fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark or place; and in the sky
The larks still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt daw, saw sunset glow
Loved and were loved, and now we lie,
In Flanders fields

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The Torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppoies grow
In Flanders fields.

-John McCrae (1915, Europe)
Click to expand...

GRADATIM

Heaven is not reached at a single bound;
But we build the ladder by which we rise
From the lowly earth, to the vaulted skies,
And we mount to its summit round by round.

I count this thing to be grandly true:
That a noble deed is a step toward God,
Lifting the soul from the common clod
To a purer air and a broader view.

We rise by the things that are under feet;
By what we have mastered of good and gain;
By the pride deposed and the passion slain,
And the vanquished ills that we hourly meet.

We hope, we aspire, we resolve, we trust,
When the morning calls us to life and light,
But our hearts grow weary, and, ere the night,
Our lives are trailing the sordid dust.

We hope, we resolve, we aspire, we pray,
And we think that we mount the air on wings
Beyond the recall of sensual things,
While our feet still cling to the heavy clay.

Wings for the angels, but feet for men!
We may borrow the wings to find the way —
We may hope, and resolve, and aspire, and pray;
But our feet must rise, or we fall again.

Only in dreams is a ladder thrown
From the weary earth to the sapphire walls;
But the dreams depart, and the vision falls,
And the sleeper wakes on his pillow of stone.

Heaven is not reached at a single bound;
But we build the ladder by which we rise
From the lowly earth, to the vaulted skies,
And we mount to its summit, round by round.

Josiah Gilbert Holland

My Best self · Oct 14, 2020

Day 19

MountainSea · Oct 15, 2020

Congratulations to everyone finding success right now.

To everyone still struggling (myself included) let's take a moment to refocus on why we are here. Did you know that 80% of New Year's resolutions fail?

Newton's law explains why: "An object at rest stays at rest and an object in motion stays in motion"

We're here to propel ourselves into 2021 so we don't have to make a resolution instead we are making a continuation.

Deleted Account · Oct 15, 2020

Relapsed again yesterday! This weekly relapse cycle is really starting to get to me. I'm rather worried that I'll never be rid of this addiction. However, I'm back on my feet, trying again!

Jefe Rojo · Oct 15, 2020

Sifo-Dyas said: ↑

Relapsed again yesterday! This weekly relapse cycle is really starting to get to me. I'm rather worried that I'll never be rid of this addiction. However, I'm back on my feet, trying again!
Click to expand...

Where do you think you went wrong this last time? What behaviors could you avoid to keep yourself from succumbing again?

Log in

The START 2021 STRONGER Challenge [CLOSED]

Jefe Rojo Moderator Assistant Staff Member Moderator Assistant

Ian Of Freelandia Fapstronaut

Jefe Rojo Moderator Assistant Staff Member Moderator Assistant

Teutão Fapstronaut

My Best self Fapstronaut

NoFap Defender

Schia Fapstronaut

Steppingintotheunkown Fapstronaut

Deleted Account Guest

Deleted Account Guest

Deleted Account Guest

Deleted Account Guest

Deleted Account Guest

Ian Of Freelandia Fapstronaut

tonyk1982 Fapstronaut

Teutão Fapstronaut

Jefe Rojo Moderator Assistant Staff Member Moderator Assistant

My Best self Fapstronaut

NoFap Defender

MountainSea Fapstronaut

Deleted Account Guest

Jefe Rojo Moderator Assistant Staff Member Moderator Assistant

Share This Page

Log in

The START 2021 STRONGER Challenge [CLOSED]

Jefe Rojo Moderator Assistant Staff Member Moderator Assistant

Ian Of Freelandia Fapstronaut

Jefe Rojo Moderator Assistant Staff Member Moderator Assistant

Teutão Fapstronaut

My Best self Fapstronaut NoFap Defender

Schia Fapstronaut

Steppingintotheunkown Fapstronaut

Deleted Account Guest

Deleted Account Guest

Deleted Account Guest

Deleted Account Guest

Deleted Account Guest

Ian Of Freelandia Fapstronaut

tonyk1982 Fapstronaut

Teutão Fapstronaut

Jefe Rojo Moderator Assistant Staff Member Moderator Assistant

My Best self Fapstronaut NoFap Defender

MountainSea Fapstronaut

Deleted Account Guest

Jefe Rojo Moderator Assistant Staff Member Moderator Assistant

Share This Page

My Best self Fapstronaut

NoFap Defender

My Best self Fapstronaut

NoFap Defender