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A direct and better way of transforming the impulses

Discussion in 'Abstinence, Retention, and Sexual Transmutation' started by Stichting, Oct 17, 2020.

  1. Stichting

    Stichting Fapstronaut

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    A direct and better way of transforming the impulses

    Usually when you see images of women/men or in real life, it could turn you on or makes you wish you were in a relationship with them. That can be really distracting and time consuming as you probably have noticed. In some instances it involves much rethinking or even addiction.

    Next time when this occurs, when you see an attractive person in real or not real life, implement a better reaction to the first impulses that come from when you see the person(s).

    Every time there are some kind of more simple initial impulses when you see an attractive person. We are biological used to transform those first impulses into certain next thoughts/feelings related to getting more in touch with him/her for eventually procreation. That's also what I meant with the different layers in my previous post. First one is the more simple impulses, next layer is the following processing you do with it.

    The key with this is that you can train to very rapidly transform those first impulses into something else that isn’t problematic for you. It is all the same neuro-energy in different pathways in the brain.

    For example next time you see someone on screen or IRL, try to simply feel happy from those first impulses you get, or see that impulse as some creative thought coming to you, or maybe something funny. Or feel like you discovered something new scientifically important.

    This transforming is a short simple thing to do, no difficult long thinking step in between of what you’re going to do with it. Then it wouldn’t be practical. In many ways it can be converted, you just have to try several times and see for yourself what works best. It's not something that came to me after thinking how to do it, more that it was invented during those situations. Therefore it’s difficult to explain.
     
    hadenuf likes this.
  2. Brahmacharya_UK

    Brahmacharya_UK Fapstronaut

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    Hi @Stichting NóFáp,

    Although you are a veteran of this site, and I relatively early on in my recovery, I can still relate to a lot of what you've written here.

    I am 60 days currently, and although I do not seek out P, or M and am aiming my best for Retention (Good so far). However I have difficulties with triggering situations and content, so my first reaction will be to either Look away, or shield/close my eyes. This arises from a fear that I will not be able to cope with, or process these triggers and they may lead to a relapse. Because the last relapse completely battered me, I do everything I can (Short of living in the monastery) to avoid falling into these traps again.

    That's what should happen, the problem that my P-Addled cortex jumps straight into fantasy mode and my mind will run away with me. I practice meditation with a view to being able to control my mind when it happens and divert my attention elsewhere.

    I guess this is similar to having a "Muse". Similar perspectives come from the ideas of "Think and Grow Rich" and "Divine Inspiration" books. A passage in the latter:

    “Whenever you come across a beautiful woman, try to visualize Ma Jagadamba (the „Divine Mother") in her and contemplate, „She must be a manifestation of Ma Jagadamba, that is why she is so beautiful. She is the Divine Mother blessing me with Her darshana." By entertaining such a Bhava, mentally bow to Her with reverence. This will keep your passion subdued.”

    I imagine this will be achieved with practice - I am early on in recovery but still I will be able to practice these advanced techniques.

    Thank you for sharing about it.
     
  3. Stichting

    Stichting Fapstronaut

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    That's an option, but not what I meant with it. That's more like a way of viewing, this is more direct what I mean. It's difficult to explain what's going on in my head with this phenomenon because it happens so fast, but I will try my best to lay it out, also in future posts. After the first event that occurs when you see a woman, it is manifested in something else. A kind of emotion or thought process.
     

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