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Wished today never existed

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Lilbase, Dec 22, 2020.

  1. Lilbase

    Lilbase Fapstronaut

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    So after 87 days of pm mode I relapsed... I wont give up though the war as just begin I will fight till my last breath, porn sucks....
    I have been having sex but today when I relapsed and orgasm to p in my head I felt so bad I feel thousands of nerves reuniting in my head.. Lost appetite so depressed and shaking.... The struggle continues tomorrow no going back
     
    xXsinnerXx, dharana and AKUNT_5891 like this.
  2. FoundTheFreedom

    FoundTheFreedom Fapstronaut

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    87 days! Impressive. Don't beat yourself up because you relapse. Try to figure out what compelled you to relapse. You can have a longer streak once you know why you relapsed and put in place a strategy for avoiding that trigger. It's not a failure. It's a lesson we need to learn. Over time, we'll learn our triggers and learn how to avoid those triggers. I honestly thought if you get to like 90 days, you are free from this but now after reading your post, I'm just not sure. As I said, don't get hung up on beating yourself up. Learn all you can about this relapse so you'll determine something else you need to avoid. I look forward to more posts from you. Happy Holidays!!!
     
    blacklabel92 likes this.
  3. AKUNT_5891

    AKUNT_5891 Fapstronaut

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    You are amazing Lilbase I hav not had a streak longer than 48 days. Good luck!
     
    blacklabel92 likes this.
  4. Lilbase

    Lilbase Fapstronaut

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    Initially I defeated the addiction after the struggle began June I got booted September 21st I went on hard mode and relapsed 7times to porn btw June&July August I got to realise porn was the issue so I went PM from August- September relapsed twice to masturbation, I got booted September 21st I got to realize despite my relapses my streak was counting, on 21st September when I got booted I was so happy when I saw my friends I felt omg this is the kind of freedom my friends have been enjoying... As foolish as I'm I thought I free I should just join my friends and have some alcoholic drinks immediately that drink entered my mouth and begin to digest I felt nerves reuniting in my head I begin to get urge like I want to have sex I just knew I was in trouble so I resisted the urge that day that same night I have a wet dream I waited 3days so I decided to have sex, then I started my journey from there till I relapsed to masturbation ystrdy it's 87days and it's been August since I watched porn...


    Lessons learnt

    1. Taking alcohol or any dopamine increasing substance is a relapse as worst as masturbating to porn

    2. Sex have no addiction, despite having sex during my streak it didn't interrupted my booting process

    3. Masturbation is a reset not a relapsed excessive masturbation is a relapse i.e masturbation slows booting process

    Despite reset or relapse your initial days u went pmo free still counts don't give up
     
    blacklabel92 likes this.
  5. Lilbase

    Lilbase Fapstronaut

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    I relapsed because I was depressed and idol. I will surely get booted I'm going I have defeated the addiction before but relapsed to alcohol because of my stupidity and carelessness I will defeat it again, the last time I watched porn is August.. I relapsed because of alcohol on 25th of September then I started another streak pm mode NW I will go fully hard mode....... But don't misquote me sex didn't interrupted my booting I just feel like going on hard mode
     
    blacklabel92 likes this.
  6. Lilbase

    Lilbase Fapstronaut

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    PM mode though, PM mode is good try it, its has effective as hard mode
     
    blacklabel92 likes this.
  7. AKUNT_5891

    AKUNT_5891 Fapstronaut

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    What is it PM mode?
     
    blacklabel92 likes this.

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