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Relapsing after 84 days of NoFap

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by HanifA, Feb 9, 2021.

  1. HanifA

    HanifA Fapstronaut

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    Hi nofappers,

    I made a long streak of 84 days of nofap. After relapsing I now relapse almost every 3-4 days. I feel I am back to my old binging times and it scary me. I am now 26 years old and I need get back up and stop watching p*rn. I need some motivation. Please help me
     
    sam30, tmsx and Innervision like this.
  2. Jo-trying

    Jo-trying Fapstronaut

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    Hi,
    This addiction is tough to get over! I've been addicted for 25 years and tried so many times to quit and relapsed. Here's the motivational part (I hope), it is getting easier and easier to abstain for longer periods as my brain starts rewiring itself to a "normal" setting. I've started getting enjoyment from hobbies and activities that didn't do anything for me while pmo'ing regularly.
    IMO, I think it takes longer to quit and move on than most of us expect or are prepared for - just don't give up on yourself. So you broke your streak - try to remember how you felt and what you learnt during those 84 days, analyze, internalize and use that insight to be better prepared for your next attempt!
    It will get easier to abstain and rewire your circuits, just give it your best efforts and, most importantly, time.
    You got this!
     
    Keli, dandausa and Innervision like this.
  3. Innervision

    Innervision Fapstronaut

    During my journey, I've had all sorts of streaks: short ones (a few days), long ones (weeks), very long ones (months). One thing you can be sure is that, for a long time, you'll have to learn how to deal with urges, temptations, weaknesses and vulnerabilities. Slowly, you can build a system to cope with these factors successfully and a lot of momentum starts to kick in and help stay on track (you already have done it, given your long streak). It's a non-linear path, and everything that happens can teach us the best way to improve ourselves and get rid of unhealthy patterns of behavior. all the best!
     
  4. same problem, i reach day 72 and then 80 and I relapse. every time i reach a long strike then i have these relapses every 4-5-6 days
     
  5. dandausa

    dandausa Fapstronaut

    Thanks for this advice. I wish that 5 years ago I hadn't given up after getting to a 90 day streak and falling. I wish I'd seen this more as a process rather than a one and done thing.
     
  6. 1ANDDONE

    1ANDDONE Fapstronaut

    At OP. The 84 days is helpful. The point of the reboot is to teach yourself that you are in control, and what you do is your choice. You can train your brain to accept it is not getting a dopamine high from porn on a regular basis, not to expect it, not to want it, not to miss it, from porn. You cannot train your brain to not want a dopamine high from naturally occurring stimulation. Be self aware. We are wired to like a dopamine high, love it even. Be aware that the ONLY reason we watch porn is to get that high. Instead of thinking "I am watching porn" try thinking "I am watching porn to get a dopamine high." It is important to think of porn as a tool; it is a means to an end. There is nothing wrong with you, it is just that humanity has figured out yet another way to artificially trigger brain reward event. You have recognized that is a problem for you. Keep pushing through and you will fix it. Peace.
     
  7. HanifA

    HanifA Fapstronaut

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    Thanks all of you for your answers
     
    tmsx likes this.
  8. runner0424

    runner0424 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for sharing. I had 18 years or so of struggle with porn. Here is what I have learned

    I relapsed twice after 6 months Or so being porn free. I’m currently a year or so free from that relapse. Although in this year, I had 2 near relapses and straddled the line and looked and tempted myself more than I should have of barely clothed or see through.

    I have learned a lot in my struggle with porn. One, is what triggers me. A lot on the internet and tv triggered me(seeing beautiful women). I believe my last relapse was super bowl halftime show, I didn’t relapse that night, but like a week or two after it, but those images stayed with me and I kept wanting more, even after 6 months. The relapse before was seeing on ESPN website the athletes body magazine and got curious which athletes made it and had beautiful woman. Had zero intention of doing porn, but those were triggers.

    I also researched And watched videos of the science behind it all and it releases dopamine In your brain and scary how the addiction can become when I thought I could control it.

    the ways I feel like I have conquered it for good was that I had my wife put in an adult filter password that I don’t know what it is(it could be a friend if not married). It’s my backup plan when having a bad day and can’t see the adult sites. I also don’t watch shows that could trigger me and try to turn my head if I think a scene is coming. More importantly though, I have really grown in my faith with God. I have listened to so many sermons on temptations and that has helped me tremendously. Rick Warren and Greg Laurie are 2 of my favorites and have helped me a ton!! I learned about all the garbage I was putting in my mind. The analogy was how we have to watch what we eat, we can’t eat McDonald’s fried food every meal without bad consequences, the same thing applies with what you consistently put in your mind. We are trying to undo years and years of bad addictions and it takes time to undo that.
    “Above Inspiration” YouTube videos are great too. Give them a listen, it’s usually 10-20 min long.

    Hopefully this helps and try and learn as much as possible and avoid whatever gets you tempted and triggered. M make it a lifestyle change and don’t beat yourself up if you have a relapse. Just learn from it and keep trying to do better. Porn free radio podcast by Matt Dobschuetz
    I also told myself , I would help as many people possible struggling with this as I could once when I got it under control.

    Learn as much as you can and it is beatable. I’m glad you guys are seeing a therapist and work on what you put into your mind. Put great things in your mind. I hope this helps and keeps us updated.
     
  9. KarenWilson

    KarenWilson New Fapstronaut

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    If you passed more than 50 days, it will be times easier to control.
     
    tmsx likes this.
  10. runner0424

    runner0424 Fapstronaut

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    It gets easier, but it’s still can be a struggle on bad days or with too much time to kill.
     
    tmsx likes this.
  11. tmsx

    tmsx Fapstronaut

    Congrats on reaching one year
     
  12. runner0424

    runner0424 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks!! Hopefully some of these tools can help. I spent many years not thinking it was a problem or addiction and had no clue about what was going on and had to figure it out.
     
    tmsx likes this.
  13. Jo-trying

    Jo-trying Fapstronaut

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    You're welcome bud - we're all here for each other.
     
    tmsx likes this.

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