The Lord of the Rings Challenge

270 days

 

Day 12.

 

Day 18 check-in (Attempt 4) - Bucklebury ferry.

 

Day 4

Spent a day in the office which obviously prevents me from using PMO, but after everyone else left for the day the temptation resurfaced. Thankfully I stopped my train of thought and more or less said to myself - ‘really?? In the office? Fool of a Took!’

This served as a reminder to physically distance myself from sources and environments of temptation - e.g. don’t spend too much time alone in my flat, instead go for a walk/run (or soon after lockdown in the UK lifts, go to the pub)! I hope to resume my old exercise habits soon, now that the mornings are bright and fresh it’s the perfect weather to start running - but will likely purchase some weights to use at home over the summer.

It’s been great to catch up on how you’re all doing with your reboots - congratulations to you @jaberwaki !! Such a fantastic achievement, stand strong during the rest of your journey!

 

Day 4 complete!

I spent a couple hours tonight studying for a biology test I have tomorrow. As one might expect, my brain got a little bored partway through and tried to distract me with urges. I wanted to avoid a reset so badly. I knew it would make me do poorly on my test tomorrow, so I went and took a cold shower. It was in fact quite cold, not pleasant at all, but it killed the urges and gave me such a sense of relief. I realized it's been a while since I truly had the grit, the desperation even, to fight off the urges. I would coast for a few days, perhaps a full week, and then slide passively off the deep end again. We can't be like that. This is a FIGHT! So get out there and fight. Do it! Be STRONG!

 

Day 5
Check in

 

Day 4 I've started reading the Silmarillion over Easter and it is better than I ever thought possible. I definitely recommend it

 

Daily checking.

I love the Silmarillion too. It´s as great as unkown. Now I´m reading Beren and Luthien, next book will be The fall of Gondolin.

St. George, pray for us!

 

Checking in on Day 131.

 

Been 11 days. I am catching myself be surprised when I walk up to my bathroom mirror. I look different. I like what I see. Awesomeness. Must keep this up. Looking less orc and Uruk-Hai all the time. Almost hobbit like. LOL.

 

275 days the stairs of Cirith Ungol
350 days no PMO, semen retention

 

Day 129. Feeling very mellow today. A solid week is coming to a close and looking forward to a nice relaxing weekend after having been sick last weekend. I feel that the path is actually getting easier lately. I am still keeping my eye out for danger and my wits about me.

 

Day 232. Checking in

 

Not a check in. Just wanted to share what I am going through today. Listening to Your Brain on Porn audio book. Went through a part last night where he quoted people who have gone through porn addiction. One really hit me. The person found pmo when 15. Older than I was. He talked about how he lost all motivation, became painfully shy, marks went down and some other things that mysteriously happened to me around the same time I found pmo. My marks is school went down. I lost interestin things I used to love doing. Had no motivation. I am coming to terms with what happened to me. I am feeling peace. I am feeling a sadness. It did steal my life. I am wondering where I might be if I had not found it. It’s ok though. Maybe I would be where I am headed. To be a music teacher. Maybe I would have figured this out at 18 rather than 40. It’s ok. At least I am getting there. I firmly believe God can make good out of bad situations. Finding porn at 10 years old and having it steal ones life is terrible. It’s ok. God will make good out of it. That makes me happy. Thanks for reading. Bless you.

 

day 60

 

Checking in. Gorgeous day today. My son ride a pedal bike for the first time this morning so I’m full of positive dad vibes. Now gonna get out for a mountain bike ride of my own with a good buddy. Lovin life!

 

Check in day 3

I feel like I am regaining control but it is still early days. Need to watch out as I approach days 5-8. One of the most dangerous periods in any attempt to stay porn free.

Stay strong brothers!

 

Day 354.

 

Day 7,

Taking it day by day, but hey! One week PMO free so YAY!

Here is to a safe weekend Fellowship.