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The Lord of the Rings Challenge

Discussion in 'Events & Challenges' started by RiseToGreatness, Sep 22, 2019.

Should the Thread Title be extended?

Poll closed Jun 21, 2020.
  1. No, leave like that: "The Lord of the Rings Challenge"

    18 vote(s)
    54.5%
  2. Yes. "The Lord of the Rings Challenge: The Fellowship of Nofap"

    15 vote(s)
    45.5%
  3. Yes. "The Lord of the Rings Challenge: Rising Fellowship of Eärendil"

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  4. Yes. "The Lord of the Rings Challenge: The Journey to Mount Doom"

    5 vote(s)
    15.2%
  5. Yes. "The Lord of the Rings Challenge: The Quest of the Ring-bearer"

    6 vote(s)
    18.2%
Multiple votes are allowed.
  1. RiseToGreatness

    RiseToGreatness Fapstronaut

    5,927
    34,114
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    Checking in Fellowship :)

    Good day today as i resume my goals and dreams work. i was feeling a bit drained these last days, and much more vulnerable to urges and porn thoughts. and today i started fishing, just a couple of seconds, but that´s was enough to ring an alarm in me. i was like "again? what the fuck is going on with me?" so i remember a video from JK that i love very much, i watched it again and it shined a light on my present situation. basically i was totally uninspired and life have a become a drag these past days. some good days, yes, but no real fullfilment, just feeling time going by. so i gonna resume my goals and dreams work, that i have neglect these past months due to heavy withdrawal sympthoms.

    Let´s welcome our new member @uman37 and our returned brother @FellowCompanion ;)

    The following brothers have upgraded and reach places in Middle Earth. Congratulations!! :)

    @MyGodandMyAll27 - Hobbit / Hobbiton (Let´s do this my brother!! :) )
    bilbo 3.gif

    @Rubzi @Baby Yoda - Pass of Caradhras / Misty Mountains
    dia 40 - pass of caradhras.gif

    @crazyhorse11 - Morgul Road / Morgul Vale
    dia 170 - morgul road.jpg

    @Johnthesavage vs Witch-king of Angmar / Mordor
    day 375 3.gif


    Checking out brave Fellowship!!! Here´s the video that i was talking about. Thanks JK, you saved my day ;).

    Have a great day brave companions!!! :)

     
    Last edited: May 8, 2021
  2. Revanthegrey

    Revanthegrey Fapstronaut

    1,626
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    Day 82
    What is P- sub? fellowship
    [​IMG]
    Oh I got it, okay, I was looking for womens but nothing about P, I saw a difference in myself this time, in my PMO days after this activity, what follow was looking for P and M, but now I don't want to do nothing of that.
    I can't see P because they hurt people and doing M doesn't make any sense for to me now.

    Edit: What i saying again is a trick of my mind again, this is too dangerous!. I will avoid it if is possible
    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: May 8, 2021
  3. rotten_tomato

    rotten_tomato Fapstronaut

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  4. Slider8

    Slider8 Fapstronaut

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    Another weird day, most of which I spent at home and...made myself a fingerboard.Got so absorbed in this project that I missed breakfast and lunch, later on done some pull ups and hangs. Watched movie'Super me' on netflix it's quite good one for my taste.8 minutes of evening meditation were not of the same quality as morning ones :).
     
  5. crazyhorse11

    crazyhorse11 Fapstronaut

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    Dear friends, I come here humbly to ask for your prayers and to confess that I did MO last night for the first time since mid Nov last year. I did not P, but, despite all my posts on fishing, I fished again last night and felt I had to M to prevent the fishing from escalating into P, which was had become imminent due to a series of bad choices I made over the last 4 weeks. I have recycled a post on fishing that @RiseToGreatness (& JK Emezi) posted earlier in the year at the end of this post as I believe that it demonstrates clearly where the gaps in my understanding of fishing (substituting/ objectifying) lie. I feel so embarrassed that I presumed to post on fishing but 2-3 days ago, only to fall straight in there again myself.

    So by the rules of this forum, I now move from King to Orc, which feels terrible. But I will keep counting the No P days, as I believe it is vitally important to keep up this No P streak, while I get back on the No MO wagon.

    Dissection of How & Why I MO'd last night:
    • At the start of this year I set a resolution checklist, which I followed religiously up to the end of March
    • The month of March I also upped the ante, going off suga, increased my exercise routine and lost weight
    • April was then an extremely busy month in work, which lead to late nights which in turn lead to late mornings, so my sleep pattern went out of kilter
    • This coincided with going back on the sugar, and so during this busy period I started stress eating with sugar again, biscuits, chocolates, etc...
    • Started getting stomach problems, and like most people, felt the COVID claustrophobia, coupled with loneliness, more intensely than ever before
    • Tolerance for problems dropped, leading to bitching a moaning, leading to pushing people away and feeling socially ashamed of being such a complainer
    • Started fighting with friends - increasing my sense of isolation
    • People start telling me I need to chill out and calm down. I could feel I was super-charged and not in a good way.
    • Found I had no time to scratch: simple tasks like doing the dishes got pushed out on the long finger. Ended each day so tired that all I could do was watch a movie
    • So moved about in a haze from stressful workdays, to stoned like movie watching, to sleeping late
    • De-prioritised posting in this forum. Went from posting thrice weekly in March, to once every 10 days in April. Also parked the Freedom Fight course for April.
    • De-prioritised mindful and BRACE breathing
    • As colleagues in work were also under pressure, the tone of conversation dropped rapidly (lead mostly by the female colleagues). So almost daily innuendo, puns and flirtatious jokes at work
    • Although I was very vigilant on my movie selection regarding triggers, there were still obviously Beautiful women acting - and these awoke the dopamine receptors who had been crying out for relief from the stress I was putting my mind and body under
    • Started looking up the actresses afterwards reading about them etc.... (substituting/ fishing)
    • Got caught out by serious triggers on one movie, that shares a name with another movie that was rated as not having any triggers on commonsense media - as I was on an exercise bike at the time I couldn't switch it off in time and the deltafosB highways light up
    • watched an innocent comedy one night and thought that laughter could be the substitute I needed, so watched another comedy with the same actor the next night, which commonsense media called out as having triggers, but I gauged that the laughter I would get would outweigh the dangers of any triggers which I planned on skipping through (bad mistake as this movie was full of very bad triggers) - part of me knew this was a bad idea but I silenced this part of me
    • Now at this stage the urges are screaming at me - and the Gollum inside is gleaming with excitement
    • Had nocturnal emissions on Thursday night for first time in over 2 months, maybe 3
    • I commit to stop fishing but as soon as this week ended, along with one of the busiest periods of the year, I crashed last night and with the chase from the Nocturnal Emissions found myself looking for new movies but this time not really caring if I saw trigger scenes or not, telling myself I could handle them (big mistake & hypocritical in the extreme)
    • Urges were at fever pitch and I was inches away from P, fantasies were raging in me and I flirted with ideas that I had not had in over a year and continued to fish
    • Decided to MO to end the escalation before the fishing became P, which was very close - this is not an excuse but it is the path my mind took to making the decision (the wrong path)
    How to fix this?

    I realise now I am going to have to fight with the chase for all day tomorrow, Monday and maybe Tuesday when the endorphins drop and I will fall into a rage. All of which I will need to surf.

    I dug out this link from Freedom Fight which I have sent to several people who have relapsed in the past, and which I need for myself now:
    I will take these pointers from this video to heart
    • Response to relapse needs to be repentance and not just regret
    • Repentance = allow myself to feel my brokeness + confess (to God & to you here) + commit to not do this again
    • Freedom is near when we are living in Reality
    • Living in reality = complete honesty = do not deny, minimise, rationalise (make excuses)
    • Not Relapsing is not the only goal, the ultimate goal is Freedom, and Freedom only happens by living in reality
    • We want to celebrate an immediate and complete confession after relapse
    • Relapse is a Short Lapse In Progress - S.L.I.P - if you learn from it, repent and grow in understanding as a result of it, you are not back at square one - genuine progress has been made - do not let this defeat you
    • A relapse does not stop the healing process but does have consequences (chaser effect, lit delta fosb highways, fished images in the mind, stronger urges)
    • Learn from the relapse
    I commit to posting here minimum twice a week, or every 3 days

    I commit to BRACE/ Mindful breathing daily

    I will resurrect the resolution checklist and start back into it from tomorrow

    Post by @RiseToGreatness of JK Emezi

    Hey brothers,

    I have managed to stay away from masturbation for a long time, thanks to the program. I've also stayed away from pornography for the most part, except for some slips which were not picked up by my pornography filters.

    However, I've had a hard time getting rid of what you would call substitutes. Like whenever I see an attractive actress in a movie, a beautiful musician, or a stunning girl in real life, I want to check her out online.

    Also, I have a hard time sometimes stopping myself from checking out bikini or lingerie pictures. I've added most online shopping sites that are an issue for me to my filter. But it always seems as if pictures are slipping through still.

    I've also blocked Instagram and Twitter, which used to be triggers. I still have Facebook because of necessity, both for work and for the program, so it works okay for me most of the time.

    Any ideas on how I could deal with this issue?

    Let me break down my answer for you.

    There Are No Substitutes

    The first thing to do when you find yourself in this situation is you've got to examine your beliefs. In this case, that starts with the idea of the word “substitutes”. Do you see these things as substitutes?

    When you're serious about your reboots, there are no substitutes.

    Everything mentioned comes under the umbrella of pornography for this brother. This is probably the case for you, too. If you’re looking up pictures of actresses online, or even women you’ve seen in real life, it’s a slip. If you masturbate to models wearing lingerie or bikinis, that counts as a slip.

    If you become aroused by viewing these images, you should treat it the same way you treat any other pornographic content. It doesn’t matter whether other people see them as “lesser of two evils”. Once you slip it’s going to feel the same way. Whether you slip on a porn site or a shopping site, all slips lead to identical feelings of shame.

    Dissect Your Behavior
    Once you accept that substitutes are no longer acceptable, now you need to look at your behavior. The best way to do this is by writing it down in your journal as an exercise. You want to really dissect what it is that you’re doing when acting out this way.

    Ask yourself, “Why am I looking up an actress, musician, or woman in real life online?”

    Why do you do this? What is the purpose of that behavior? It doesn’t matter whether you saw her on the big screen, the small screen, or in real life. Why do you automatically feel the need to search for them on Instagram?

    Have you ever even paused to ask yourself this?

    If you’re like most of us, probably not. You’re likely stuck in a thinking loop that you’ve never bothered to question. Once you dissect the behavior, though, you realize it doesn’t serve any logical purpose at all. There’s no good reason to look her up online that isn’t connected to your addiction or out-of-control behavior.

    Porn Substitutes Stem From Objectification
    Here’s the root of the problem: when you look this woman up online, you’re objectifying her. Your urge to look her up online implies that what you’ve seen of her already is not enough. It isn’t enough for you until you can find more images of her and judge her from a sexual standpoint. Until you can objectify this woman, it’s not enough for you.

    Now you need to ask yourself, “What does this say about me?”

    When you have a habit of objectifying women it will ruin your relationships with them for as long as the behavior continues. You cannot truly love a woman because you value her only for her looks, not for her as a person.

    You likely don’t realize these things you view as porn substitutes only make the problem worse. You’re looking at these women as objects, not as another human being with attributes for you to appreciate. She has value outside of her looks but you’re incapable of seeing them when you’re valuing her only on her appearance.

    The problem persists even after you’ve cut pornography and other out-of-control behaviors from your life. You’re not going to progress in your reboot until you address this core internal issue. You must work through your objectification of women if you want to overcome the desire to look at these substitutes.

    Strengthening Boundaries Takes Practice
    Your Porn Reboot won’t be successful all at once. It takes practice to build these internal boundaries. Pornography is a clear issue for every man who comes to the program, but many neglect to consider why these substitutes are a problem, too.

    Part of a serious reboot is examining each of these boundaries as they come up. Unpack your behavior.
    Why are you doing the things you do?
    What do you hope to achieve by taking a certain action?
    The more you dissect your behavior, the more you understand yourself. The more you understand yourself, the stronger your boundaries become.

    Each time you find that your inner addict is searching for something and find it, it’s time to sit down and examine it. Rebooting takes time but you’ll make progress as long as you’re committed to the process. It doesn’t happen overnight but you’ll continue progressing as long as you stick with the system.
     
    Last edited: May 8, 2021
  6. eagle rising

    eagle rising Fapstronaut

    Your thorough analyses are very eye-opening and extremely relevant to anyone who takes the time to read through. Thank you are sharing this! There is a clear progression from March up until now. The course could have been corrected numerous times. Perhaps this is where an AP would come in handy. I don't know if you have one, however.

    I think you made a good choice in keeping a no-P counter going! This will help you out mentally and psychologically.

    The words from Emezi were definitely worth bringing back up. Thanks for doing that.

    I would like to add a couple more words about objectifying women... Who is the person who is objectifying women? That person who only sees women for the object of pleasure is focused entirely on his human identity, and his identity as a male. This huge alignment with our respective genders nowadays is one of the causes of this P-addicted society.

    The life that operates within a person is very minute when they are focused on how someone looks. When that life is minute it will be especially difficult to see the life in the woman. However, when your life essence, the soul, the spirit is vibrating within you will be more likely to see that soul and spirit that lies within those women.

    In order to stop the objectification of women one must minimize his identity as the flesh and as a male. Does that mean you start dressing up in dresses and whatnot? No. Does that mean that you can't go and build muscle? No. Does that mean you have to be soft? No. It is deeper than that. You enhance your life energy and you won't need your body's sexual mechanism to get a high from other women. That is the other part, the desire. When you are highly identified with having a penis you will naturally look for women to match that identity.

    So I believe if one focuses on being a life, they will be able to see life in everything, rather than the superficiality of such a life.


    You have what it takes Crazyhorse11! All the best!
     
  7. Cartographer

    Cartographer Fapstronaut

    460
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    Day 2,

    Holding strong, happy to have some relief and safety in my P blocker.

    Best to you all Fellowship!
     
  8. HE^MAN

    HE^MAN Distinguished Fapstronaut

  9. bob200

    bob200 Fapstronaut

    242
    2,053
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    Day 3

    The weekend really moved fast because I was not home at all. Went on a trip with my girlfriend and ended up having great sex (we have been in a real dry strike) so my mood was really lifted from the intimacy.

    I’m shit scared, right now, but today I’m finally starting to send out CV’s to try and find a job as a developer after I’ve been unemployed since the covid shitstorm had started. Wish me luck.
     
  10. TITLE - ORC
    Day 2/500
    Longest streak - 18
    Last streak - 1
    Total PMO - 290
    Total hours remaining - 11952
    Days remaining - 498
    Promise- 1 Jan 2020, 1 Jan 2021,1 April 2021
    Challenges completed - 1
    1 DAYS - (18th Feb 2021)(26th Mar 2021)(1st Apr 2021)(8th May 2021)✓
    3 DAYS -(31st Jan 2021)(21th Feb 2021)
    7 DAYS -
    14 DAYS -
    21 DAYS -
    30 DAYS -
    45 DAYS -
    60 DAYS -
    90 DAYS -
    365 DAYS -
    500 DAYS -
     
  11. Rubzi

    Rubzi Fapstronaut

    681
    4,271
    123
    Day 41 check-in (Attempt 4) - The pass of Caradhras
     
  12. FellowCompanion

    FellowCompanion Fapstronaut

  13. Diderik

    Diderik Fapstronaut
    NoFap Defender

    913
    3,961
    123
    I have gone six months without pulling up any pornography, as of 5 May!

    My counter correctly indicates my time away from masturbating.

    I have been journaling less lately than I did at first. I will get back on this, because when I do not, I relapse.

    Good Luck To All,
    ~Alex
     
  14. ksie

    ksie Fapstronaut

    85
    817
    83
  15. Shadowfacts

    Shadowfacts Fapstronaut

    31
    106
    33
  16. modern milarepa

    modern milarepa Fapstronaut

    298 days the stairs of Cirith Ungol
    373 days no PMO, semen retention
     
  17. Revanthegrey

    Revanthegrey Fapstronaut

    1,626
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    The brain fog about fishing leads me to stimulated a little.
    [​IMG]
    Reset to day 0 , i will put too the counter in no porn , to see how i advance in that part.
     
    Last edited: May 9, 2021
  18. Slider8

    Slider8 Fapstronaut

    2,955
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    Those were my thoughts before the last relapse. It takes quite some time to set yourself in this way, meanwhile for shorter periods when you are able to concentrate on this thought you can see things for what they are and especially for what porn is-pixels on the screen.
    The problem is when your concentration on the new way of thinking lapses you tend to return to your old reactions to the stimuli.
    [​IMG]
     

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