My Success Journal (511+ days!)

You go man! sorry for the late response!

 

hey, sorry if I didn't answer! trying to catch up on my journal, like, it's mine, lol.
Anyway, for some period I did complete cold showers with extreme cold.
Now I enjoy my hot showers, like not really that hot and, in the end, I go for 30 second extreme cold.
and it works, it gives me all the benefits of cold showers and keeps me waken up for the day.

 

let's start again! 47 days, 24/05/2021

feeling really great, mental clarity at its highest.
I can really talk for an hour (I did it today with my psychologist) and never miss a word or a sentence.
I got every word clear before I even say it, I can use words as I want and create complicated reasonings in seconds.
Brain fog is literally gone.

Right now I am trying to better myself every single day, spiritually and physically.
I read a lot of books, sometimes in English (I am Italian) and some others in my native language, and can finish them in days, if the subject really motivates me (I read Your Brain On Porn in like two days).
Currently working out 4 times a week, eating super healthy and never skipping a meal.

A week ago I would have said: "I am doing it for the girls, to be appreciated by them" and stuff like that.

But now I am really doing it for myself, and only myself.
Gaining that confidence and Independence I wanted, we'll see how it goes.

 

thanks, my friend! missed your support!

 

48 days, 25/05/2020

from time to time I just think about girls.
I think about the last girl I kissed and how beautiful it was.

But my feelings for my virginity changed a lot.
I no longer feel ashamed for that, I no longer feel it as a race with myself.
I am enjoying the process, conscious of the fact that the sea is full of fish and I will get the same experience or something better even next summer.
as I said, I am managing to stop thinking about girls in a bad way.
I no longer train for them, eat well for them, take care of myself for them, but only for myself.

Girls are just a surplus, and I only recently understood it.
Women come after yourself. You should focus on yourself and only yourself.
And if your life is full of experiences, hobbies, well-spent quality time, just know that girls will be a surplus, something extra.

I no longer concentrate my whole existence on getting girls and trying to chase them and getting liked by them.
I am feeling more masculine and independent than ever, and maybe that's because of working out and NoFap.

Today the sun is shining and a little summer breeze is in the air.
And so is my soul and mind, at peace and focused on myself.

I wish you a good day!

 

Day 49, 26/05/2021

some spicy news for you all!
today could have been a pretty basic day, unless from what happened in the subway today:
I was coming back from my dad's office, and a girl of my age entered the subway.
She was really my type, pretty short, slim, with bob hair.

The chemistry between us was like wow.
I felt her energy and maybe she felt mine.
We were subtly flirting with looks.
For three seconds we hold eye contact and it was electrifying. Like for real.
I felt a breeze in my body and I knew there was something between us.

I really wanted and thought about going to her and chat a little, maybe get her insta and stuff.
But I didn't, still too gentle and afraid to go cold approaching girls.
Maybe it could work between us but I didn't have the guts to do it.

Anyway, it was a fantastic experience, today I remembered there are girls in this world (of covid) and there's still the same old energy inside me.

I don't really know if NoFap attraction was there, but I really felt alive, along with the vibe she gave me and that I have been able to perceive.

Good things happening after all really hyped for this spring and summer, love is in the air.

Peace.

 

thanks for the warning brother, but I already know it.

I'm not scared of the "mighty harmful bad women".
I can get away from them in a sec.

I decide who to give my attention and energy to, not going to waste those things for girls who don't deserve it.

 

I read the book "No More Mr Nice Guy" and I can't really agree with you.
Finding a girl attractive and going to approach her is just manhood. Being able to show what you want, to show her it was your choice, not hers.

Being a Nice Guy is literally making girls decide, not having the guts to express your desires and living a succubus life.

I would say when you wait for girls to approach you for the entire life in order to not "lose power" or to "show dominance", you will get the exact opposite: diminishing all possible encounters and living a lonely life waiting for that courageous girl who will approach you out of nowhere.

Anyway, even if I was a Nice Guy, after reading that book I corrected many of my behaviours.

This reasoning you explained seems a red pill one, like the basic man who thinks woman are bad, they have the power to manipulate you and they and only they have the right to decide their lover, the power of choice and not choosing "less alpha" ones.

I got rid of these thoughts. I am not saying you are a red piller, but these are red piller thoughts.

Talking about power, losing energy, bad girls, toxic girls is pretty talking like an incel, watch out.

Anyway, thanks for the warning and for telling me your experience, but I don't think this is the way of living a serene life with your sexuality and with girls.

 

Thanks, @Mr. 94 feet, now I really understood what you are trying to say.

I absolutely agree with the fact that if you are really valuable, women will just come at the right moment.
As it happened to me last summer.
So yeah, if we wanted to see it from that perspective, a great man shouldn't really waste his energy on approaching.
And maybe the street wasn't the right place, seeing last news nowadays.

But I still firmly think that you create your future and there's nothing wrong with approaching earlier results.

We both see this in the way of improving ourselves and getting that manhood every man want.
And yes, we will get there, but there are so many different possible roads to take, which bring to the same exact place, becoming a great man with great values as ancient and war ones were.

We will get there.

 

Day 52, 28/05/2021

no big news from last time, I am keeping working out, and next week I will go to a real gym, after months of training at home.

nothing to tell neither about NoFap, I am feeling the same old benefits I am feeling from the beginning of this adventure.

you start to notice most of the benefits when you can really use them.
like you notice your strength when you lift weights, I notice what NoFap made me become when I interact with people or girls.

Like the self-confidence I gained, I notice it only when I use it for good.

Anyway, trying every day to change my environment and going out of the comfort zone I was in for months (home).
I am writing from my dad's office, I am trying to study in different places and I got three options to choose from everyday.

I am only scared about a thing.
My current wifi connection, which we installed two months ago has a web filter connected to it.
Every device connected to that wifi is 100% free from porn.

The fact is that lately, we found out we did a mistake with the contract and we are paying for calls so unless they change it, we will be forced to change the wifi, along with the web filter.

I don't really know how will I behave after the loss of the best filter I've ever found.

I must be aware of every device in the home, including Fire Tv's (which I will be forced to remove, cause they have a web browser inside) and other laptops of my family.

We will see what it will happen. I am going to keep you updated.

Peace.

 

Day 63, 8/06/2021

Everything's good so far, lately, it has been really smooth.
Life is pretty monotone, I simply started going to the gym and booked an exam for late June.

How are you doing, guys?

 

I will make a list:

Your Brain On Porn
No More Mr Nice Guy!
Rich dad poor dad
How to win friends and influence people
How to be stoic
Digital Minimalism
Think and Grow Rich
The monk who sold his Ferrari
Sapiens

(Only suggesting books I personally read in the past)

 

Day 64, 9/06/2021

Feeling sore from the vaccine.
Got a big headache and can't really concentrate that much.
I hope this feeling goes away pretty fast so that I can go to the gym, but I think I'll go anyway.

Yesterday I finished watching and taking notes from my lectures.
I need to complete the exam book and do a lot of exercises for my exam.

I have time till 23/06, I need to ace it, no excuses.

Today I am a little bit nostalgic, thinking about last summer and what will come this summer.
But I am forcing myself every day to have tunnel vision.
I can't be distracted by girl thoughts or anything else.
I have my goals to achieve, my dream body to get and loneliness to deal with.

I am trying to get used to loneliness, someday we will be alone and I need to embrace it now.

I got to understand that I don't need people to make my life better.
I can make my life better alone and with my forces: people, friends and girls are only a surplus.

I shouldn't concentrate all my life and thoughts on a girl, I can't do that.
It's a waste of time, in this life there's also me, I can only trust in myself.

Trying to achieve day by day the independence I always wanted.
Tunnel vision is the key: I need to focus on myself and get my shit together.
People will follow me then, I can't follow anyone.
And if people won't do it, if I'll be forever alone for the choices I make, I'll be perfect about it, cause I only need myself, no one else.