The Lord of the Rings Challenge

Day 7. Feeling really good . God bless you all

 

Day 3 complete!

Keeping myself busy for the past couple days really did wonders. I needed a little something to provide a distraction, if you will, that allowed me to get past the worst part of the chaser. Now I will reinforce my strategy, all the tips and tricks I've learned (cold shower, exercise, prayer, spending time on NoFap) so that I can get back to business! Being an orc is better than not fighting at all, but even being an Uruk-Hai will be better XD

 

Day 366

 

Day 12 I just read a post by listenpaul and he is actually very right, I realize am not always sticking to the plan schedule of my day and it make me fall into the urge.

Keeping to my word is even more important, I have been falling in keeping my word and I need to change.

Another thing, I need to get rid of every form explicit viewing, I mean all forms of nudity that would trigger all the desire in me

One major thing is the aspect of emotion, I have noticed that when am emotionally down, (angry, depressed, frustrated, sad, broken)-( which is a normal thing if you are on earth, you cant be happy all the time?- can you?) the next reaction is to view p to make me feel better, its like a drug for an high when am low... Do you get it? Please if you have a solution to this, help me... You might be my only lifeline

Still my Day 12, pmo would not be master over me, I would get the last word

 

7 days. 2 x 30 min walks + push-ups + sit-ups.

I'm starting to feel the sexual energy building up again, my body feels more restless and my mind wants to wonder away. I do a good job trying to be aware of my thoughts, whenever the forces of temptation arise.

This night I had a sex dream, and it felt like I orgasmed. However, not a single crumb of semen could be found, not even precum. I felt myself resisting the orgasm, I even saw myself resist it in the dream. But I still felt the orgasmic feeling and I woke up from it, quite anxious. I had a similar experience on my last streak, where I pretty much have an orgasm while sleeping without ejaculation. Has anyone here experienced this?

 

I'm on day 1 again, got to about 40 days, but had a relapse yesterday. A very small one but it still counts as a relapse so day 1 here we go

 

Hi everyone.

Long time no posting. Had a wild time, ended up not getting any of the three job interviews I was doing. I did pretty good on my own for a time, made it to urok hi by myself. But there nothing else I can say except I crashed and burned really badly yesterday.

I’m going to therapy and I’ve talk to my therapist about what I feel that happened, basically I tried to win against my body and mind by force. And it worked for a day and a half. But now I’m empty and vary humble… so I’m starting over from the bottom.

 

Day 106 no PMO. Woke up super early today. Have prayed several times already and it feels like it’s going to be a good day.

 

Well I don't think it's sexual energy that builds up, it's rather overall energetic state of your body that keeps growing. Better compare it to the phone with the battery nearly always at the emergency and with limited functions available. So that when power takes you up from emergency threshold and your dormant functions start becoming active you sort of freak out and your brain is trying to convince you that it's sexual energy that is growing together with certain solutions on how to use it to keep the status quo for if it will keep growing ramifications can be life altering. And we as people usually afraid of changes due to mostly negative thinking and expectations (I think it would be true to state that most of us were brought up with attitude of looking at life whilst simultaneously trying to find and see everything that might go wrong, that might cause harm and take some action out of fear of the imaginary problems instead of see what positive changes it could bring...

Yes, I had experienced that. Did you feel a slight chaser effect afterwards? Basically speaking it's our, still ingrained, attitude towards women that plays out in these dreams. Take a note on how you think and feel about women when you go about your everyday business for it will reflect itself in your dreams.

 

What makes you angry,depressed, etc.? Make a list...if you trace the causes hard enough you will probably be able to track them down to your Ego-Pride and the solution you use is in hope to get a peace of mind and balance but it instead pushes you further down into all the hard feelings caused either by your own deeds and thoughts about them or by your reaction to the other people thoughts and actions towards you. Learn to distinct thoughts, feelings and actions that keep pushing you off balance and those that keep you balanced and peaceful. Then make a choice -which of them do you want to entertain in your life....and try to get off Ego-Pride by taking sincere care of people around you and their well-being! Hope this will help!

 

Thank you for your input, I very much appreciate it. You might be right, maybe I'm basically just starting to feel better, but my brain doesn't like these changes.

As of yet, I haven't experienced any significant chaser effect afterwards, but maybe it will come. Regarding my attitude towards women, there's no doubt I sexualise them a lot in my mind. I'm working on this, by not looking at their bodies when I pass them on the street, trying to not think sexual thoughts about them, etc. Do you have any practical tips on this issue, i.e. on how to improve ones attitude toward women?

 

You just said it like it's, thank you.... I need to find how to let go of pride

 

Checking in. Hard day yesterday but appreciating the value of good friends. Just moved into my new place following my separation with my wife. Realized this is the first time I will have ever lived alone, in 40 years. I'm looking forward to it, honestly, as I think I have a lot to learn about myself in this part of my journey, but damn it hurts. Mind is a minefield right now, and I was up at 3:30 with no chance of returning to sleep. Thankfully no urges to speak of but I'm aware that I'm now in the danger zone with little sleep and an emotionally charged experience, so I'll be careful about my internet usage and be coming here frequently. It's a beautiful day, and I intend to enjoy it. Be well everyone.

 

For that you would need to adopt a spiritual attitude:'God lives in every living beings heart', which is probably somewhat akin to the holographic universe theory stating that every part of the whole contains whole in it. So that every time you see somebody in your world, especially what you perceive as sexy and appealing to you, just say God and imagine the spirit of God is in her heart as well as in your heart ,as well as in everybody's heart. You got to see yourself as a spirit, as an immortal consciousness in this temporary body and you, she , everyone have their very important part to play in God's plan. This way you can look at women,seeing God in their heart and there won't be a place for the dirty-lustful thoughts in you. Well that's what I try to do brother!Hope this will help !

 

329 days dwarf king
404 days no PMO, semen retention

 

Relax
Just relax, that is the key. The nofap journey is all about being relax. You don't need anything more. One simple word relax. Don't focus on results, attracting girls, money, success, failure, flatlines, feelings.
You need to go beyond mind and body to achieve something that is a basic human need as it is the desire of procreation. Only a relax man can achieve the unachievable.

Don’t recall. Let go of what has passed.
Don’t imagine. Let go of what may come.
Don’t think. Let go of what is happening now.
Don’t examine. Don’t try to figure anything out.
Don’t control. Don’t try to make anything happen.
Rest. Relax, right now, and rest.

Conclusion: relax

 

It's a hard task you are after. You see, Pride is a self esteem based on multitude of our possessions and the range is huge from very material to very subtle. And even those who become monks are struggling with it. It may stem from the nice clothes you have, from the strong body all the way to being truthful and just,celibate...
And the the more subtle possession it stems from the more dangerous it is all for the one reason- it makes our love to the possession to exceed the love to God ...for example if your pride stems from truthfulness and justice you are ready to kill all liars, cheats and unfair folks in the world turning a blind eye to them being your brothers and sisters in One God, having God in their heart the same way you do and that they have part in His plan and Will ,thus forsaking love to God in favor of love to truthfulness...that's when it turns into hell. It's from love to possessions stems the desire to compare yourself to others with envy,despise, injustice, stealing and taking advantage of others springing from this can of worms...Awareness of it is the first step and humility before God is the medicine.
2 Corinth 6: 16 And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? For ye are the temple of the living God. As God hath said: “I will dwell in them and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be My people.”
...and it is for this reason Jesus said(matthew 5:3): “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven.” For with the great possessions of spiritual gifts often comes strong attachment to them(obsession) and worshiping them.

 

Thank you, friend!

 

Checking in fellowship friends!

I hope you're all having a great day!

Officially 210 days( 7 months) free from porn! I had 1 MO relapse on day 72 which and I now stand MO free 138 days.

Lot's of ups and downs in this journey and I expect there to be more as I ride out this PAWS/flatline period. There has been a lot of learning in this as well.

Stay strong !

 

This is to remind us how our thoughts, words and emotions affect our body and our behavior: