INCREASED URGES TO PMO SINCE BECOMING SEXUALLY ACTIVE

Hello Guys

Looking for some advice. I just reset my counter this morning. PMOed after just over six months of staying clean.

I have become sexually active in the last few months and have found since getting back in the game so to speak that I struggling now more than ever with urges. When I was going full hard mode it was like I had no urges what so ever. Now it is very different.

When I reflect I notice the same pattern from a previous relationship and streak. Basically I was good doing hard mode. Got a GF, became sexually active. Struggled with urges again. Started with PMO again. Then I fully relapsed after the relationship ended.

Any advice on managing this would be great!

Thank and best regards,

 

You are probably right, the reality is that we will have sexual urges, that is normal and is not something to cure. What we have to do is learn to save that sexual energy for our partners. We know we can get a quick fix from PMO but we also know that is not the healthy thing to do.

 

Lol! I do not think I could ever do that. Too many risk and then I would imagine sex with hooker would lack the intimacy of of sex with someone you care for. I suspect it would only fuel you sexual addiction. I say this because I find we can turn real sex into porn of sorts. It is like we can pornify sex. So instead of being in the moment and enjoy the touching and kissing and holding etc. I would have found myself just trying to watch the intercourse, so it is like I am watching myself penetrate a woman instead of being fully engaged in the experience. I think being with a hooker may encourage this.

I had to learn not to pornify sex.

 

It is really a balancing act, have you ever pornified sex like I mentioned above in my earlier post? How has masturbation affected the sex for you? I find it negatively impacts the experience for me. I felt a bit numb this weekend when I had sex. Maybe I was feeling guilty also.