The Lord of the Rings Challenge

Day 1

I had a massive epiphany today, before when I had those days where I was just like "I had urges but I just ignored them" and the streaks where I was getting to a week with ease were the streaks where I was the most engaged in other activities. For example I reached 8 days during the time when this new game was out on Open Beta and so me and a group of friends were playing it everyday until the beta ended. And the time when I was able to just ignore my urges and not care about them was when I had a really exciting new project for work and so I was heavily invested into that so I just wasn't paying attention to my urge. I didn't realise until now just how massive of a role my routine plays in all of this, don't get me wrong I obviously knew it was important but I didn't realise how important. This has made me realise more than ever that I need to figure out how to handle my procrastination because if I can always have something to do, maintain a smooth routine flow and minimise idle time, I believe that I will improve significantly.

 

Day 7 sorry been kinda hectic around here I will get better at checking in.

 

I understand my friend, my response was not intended as criticism. It was intended as advice, I am not telling you to write down only the uplifting moments in your journey either, as I have not. The entire reason we are on this path is to be capable of facing our bad days, without masking them behind any form of addiction.

It's okay, I first began nofap years ago. I never took it seriously up until last year, when things were horrible in my life. It's my last month and a few days in my 20's, so you are ahead of me. I am a bad student in that sphere, it took physical and mental ramifications for me to stop and face the music of my problems. And you are correct, a 90 day reboot sounds nice but it is far from the truth for those who have watched it for a decade or more.

You have good and virtuous goals. I still would urge you not to overthink, as nothing good will come of that. You will only tire your mind and only succeed in splitting hairs. Perhaps, reaching out to a therapist (if you haven't already) to assist in your PMO sobriety and also to provide you a different assortment of tools.

You can do this and I also have no doubt that you will.

 

Checking in Fellowship Friends!

Day 331 free of porn and day 259 free of MO.

This week was more of a recovery week, I took it fairly easy as I was suffering with minor levels of that post flu fatigue, I was just working. I'm excited to exercise again tomorrow though. I had 1 urge this week, nothing too strong but it was still trying to grab my attention.

I will leave you on this for today, when you are going on the internet, go with intention and goal beforehand. Don't just waddle about.When we waddle, this is where certain temptations and urges will arise. Whether this is due to boredom or avoidance, the auto pilot mode will sneak up on you easily. I'm sure many of you have simply gone on youtube and ended up wasting quite a few hours, wondering why you are even watching what you spent your time watching. The remedy for this is to know what you will be doing online, do what you set out to do and check out.

I remember reading this on the nofap forum, I don't recall who posted it. What he said was something along these lines : " The internet is like a bad neighbourhood, stay too long and you're bound to get mugged." This has stuck with me since February of this year.

Stay strong my friends.

 

444 days

 

Day 22

Long day, busy day, no time for details now. All is well, basically. I'll be more detailed with my progress again tomorrow.

 

Brothers, temptation have been strong!

I feel that I'm entering my second dangerous zone. Differently from the first (from day 7 to 14), I haven't passed through it before. I don't know what awaits me, if it will be harder, easier, or even the same. But one thing I'm sure: the tension is building up and I'm much more sensitive to any stimuli. And here comes an exemple of how life knows how to make things harder: I have a friend of my familiy passing some days with us. She's pretty cute, but waaaay older the me, so I've never thought anything dirty about her. BUT, in a moment that we were taking a photo, I raised my hand to sign to the camara and I accidentaly bumped pretty strongly into her ass. I got instantly aroused AND embarrassed at the same time. I apologized, and she understood that it was just an accident, but my mind just can't stop replaying the moment and enjoying the feeling. I have no ideia how to deal with that, but I hope I figure it out soon, cuz the tension is REALLY getting me crazy.

Any advice? I'm already planning to take a cold shower right after I wake up tomorrow and to meditate before going to sleep today.

Hope I pass through this and don't need to report a relapse.

 

Day 234

 

"let us be rid of it once and for all, come on, I cant carry it for you, but I can carry you!"
That part always gets to me.
Resist! spend the time you get the urge here, you can also meditate or read a book, you can do it, remember how shitty it feels the second after you are done.
By the way, you use youtube for that? thats wierd.

 

11 days

 

Day 487

 

This is yesterday’s report. Some urges here and there, but keeping myself very busy (maybe too busy) from the moment I wake up until the moment I go to bed. Hope that next week will be a bit more relaxing

Spoiler: Daily tasks

1. physical exercise. (Done, went for a run in the morning)
2. Meditation. (Average, did a short session while in bed)
3. Study about reboot. (Done)
4. Eating in moderation. (Done)

 

A night without worries, no urges or anything.

Day 4 - Orc.

 

Day 0

 

76 days have passed since I started the journey. I have had a lot of anxiety about a big life move I feel I have to make, but don't have the confidence to know that I can I guess? I gotta come up with a proper plan I guess.

My stress levels have been high for a long time now. I'm surprised I'm making it here, but I am. I know that if I can hold my streak during tough times I can do it during good times easily.

 

Last night was a good one, though I heard that the PMO forces were lurking in the area I didn't see any.

(25 days)

 

The urges are alright, yet another karma clearing period awaits. It always arrives before things get better from what I've read. Resistance is required!

 

Day 227 no PMO. Day 1 of hotel by myself went fine. One more night. See you guys tomorrow!

 

Day 11 completed

 

Day 83