How to check whether you're cured from death grip and PIED?

I'm curious though, if you're in a relationship and you're 30+ days out, with a girlfriend whom you don't want to know you have these issues, and don't want to do anything with her until you know it's fixed... what have you been telling her for 30+ days?

From here I would say you probably risk much more by doing stuff with a prostitute than by telling your girlfriend what's up. Also you don't have to tell her everything, or even that it's about porn. Tell her you have had this medical issue and you're working through it, so at least she knows what's going on with you. In my opinion if you feel bad about doing stuff with a prostitute in her back and you do it, it'll haunt your relationship forever. You'll be putting yourself in a position to have to lie to your gf forever. Don't do that.

As for knowing if it's fixed, I can't help you. I believe there is no magic number and it probably won't be a black/white thing. For PIED, as for any addiction, I believe you have to accept that porn is over for you. I know very little of PIED in particular, but I've known many people with addiction problems and in general, you can't truly cure an addiction so long as you're thinking of it in terms of regaining "control" over it, as in, I'll deprive myself of it for some time, and then I'll be able to use it in a more reasonable fashion. You can't. The path engraved too deep in your brain. As soon as you get that pattern going, it'll engulf you again in no time and you'll have to start over. This vulnerability will always exist in you. Don't wait out hoping for the moment you can finally re-use responsibly.

As for the death grip, I think it's mostly about being diligent about not doing it. What you want to do is condition yourself to like other things. From my own experience, not with death grip but with other stimuli, I believe it can happen rather quickly, you just need to allow it to happen. In particular, you need to build the belief that some stimuli other than that grip can allow you to finish. As time goes without a fap, you'll probably get more and more sensitive. Forget the death grip, just let your girl play with it or whatever. Focus on the sensation she's giving you rather than wandering into other fantasies. Communicate with her, tell her what feels good and what doesn't. Accept that you might not cum some of the times so as to shed the pressure of doing it. Don't be angry or disappointed about it, just try to see it as part of your process. Eventually it will happen and just knowing that some sensation can lead to it will make it happen more and more easily. At least that's been my experience with similar issues.

 

You shouldn't need to test, in my experience it all just came back one day without doing anything. I would get rock hard just from looking at the wall. Think back to when you were a teenager, you didn't need to do something to feel horny, you just were. That's how it will feel when your libido and sensitivity comes back. For me it took 60 days but if I were you I would just accept the situation and carry on with what you're doing now at least until day 90.

 

I would stay away from the fleshlight too. It may be close to the real thing but it still isn't the real thing. I would stay on track if I were you and put all sex out of your mind unless it is with a partner. PMO does not exist from here on out. Do or die!