Trying to become human (Journal)

Thank you so much friend, I'll never give up, I won't let anyone down this time.

 

@Roader to Freedom Thank u so much friend for giving me valuable advices, i really appreciate that and I wish all the success and willpower to you. I'll pray to god that you get whatever you want to achieve in life. More power to you.

 

Day 13
I helped my mom with food in the morning.
Then I spent time with my family.
Very mild urges were there.
Then the whole day went as usual, i didn't do anything productive. At night suddenly my mind start to visualise sexual pics but as soon as it happens I opened my eyes because i am afraid that my evil mind is tricking me and it's taking my patience test.

 

Day 14
I woke up at 9 am.
Then i took a bath and then went outside to sit in sun for sunlight.
Then I went to my college to ask for admission form submission date.
Then i came back at 2.
Then i sleep from 2 to 3 30.
After that everything went usual i didn't felt strong urges. The urges were mild and tolerable.

Today is 15th day in my nofap journey let's see what happens.
Hope for the best

 

Yes friend, I'll surely stay alert and aware of the urges. Actually I feel that I don't want to watch porn anymore at this point. My mind is also supporting me on this. Right now, I do not have the slightest urge to watch porn or to masturbate, I'll just go to sleep at 11 30 pm. I really feel peace and i can sleep with clear conscience. At this point I haven't include studying, workout, meditation and cold showers still I feel happy that atleast i am not contributing towards world's largest evil industry. I really want everyone to experience nofap. The time that they put in porn and masturbation can be used in the most productive way.

 

I feel if I can defeat this evil habit then i can conquer anything in life. It's success will be the biggest motivation for myself because the habit is almost 9 yrs long.

More power to fellow nofap warriors and i wish that they conquer their evil habits and find success in their life.

 

Day 15
I woke up late at 10am
Then I went outside in sunlight.
After that i had my lunch
Then passed my time with my family
At night I ate my dinner at 7pm
No urges were there around 11 pm
But I was not able to sleep and as the night progresses urges became strong but i knew that i can't give up so i resisted. Finally I slept around 3 am.

 

Unfortunately i don't have that phone friend, let alone that I don't have any feature phone with me right now. I have to resist my urges by keeping my smartphone with me. I want to fight those urges it gives a tremendous amount of motivation next day.

 

Night time is the most hard times, that's why It gives me motivation when I resist them. It's like your mind is screaming and giving you lame excuses to relapse but the warrior inside is strong enough to say no.

 

I am having a strong urge right now but i won't give in to this I have come a long way I have to beat my 18 days record then i want to achieve a month without porn and masturbation. I can't give up now

 

Day 16
Woke up at 9 am, after that i had some lunch and went outside in sunlight, then i studied for 30 mins. After that i spent time with my mother.
At night I ate my dinner and i went to sleep around 3 am. Had strong urges in mid night but i resisted them. Looking forward for day 17.

 

Yes friend, another successful day is completed now my streak is of 17 days and only 2 days left to beat my longest streak till now. I hope I will do it. More power to you friend.

 

Day 17
Woke up at 9 30 and the rest of the day went as usual. At night around 9 30 pm i was facing mild urges but fortunately I was really tired and sleepy so I went to sleep at 9 45pm. Today is the 18 th day of my nofap journey. Let's see what's this day has for me.

 

Friend, I still haven't figure out what to do in my free time I don't follow my schedule untill now so that's the thing on which I need to work . But 95% of my urges came at night time and i just resist them it is very hard for me to resist but i somehow resist them by watching DBZ motivational videos or by trying to sleep or by getting up from the bed immediately after i experience urges.

 

Day 18
I woke up at 4 30 and went for a walk at 5 30 then i had my breakfast. I went to sleep again after waking up i had my lunch then i went outside for some walking the rest of the day was usual only i was getting strong urges but i managed to resist them by sleeping. Today is the 19th day of my streak and i looking forward. I'll try to make it the better by doing some work.