[90-CHALLENGE] THE NINETY DAYS CHALLENGE !

day 3

 

Day 62/90
I have only went past 90 days once since I've been on this forums, which is around 2014 I believe so in 9 years...only one streak of 90+ days! I'm 30 now and I just cannot afford to roll down the same evil path. I hope I make it to 90 days and beyond!
Godspeed to us all!

 

Day 8 of 90 no p
Day 8 of 90 no alcohol

 

Day 6 of 90

 

Day 11/90.

 

Day 4

 

Day 7

 

Still day 0 but I want to share my thoughts since I relapsed yesterday.

First of all I thought If I could make 20 days why I can't make 90 days. I just have to repeat the process over and over.
But:

• I notice that I need another way to release my sexual energy. So I thought about getting a girlfriend or maybe just have fun.
• And the other point is that I will focus even more now and social contacts, which let me grow and from which I can learn.

 

Today will be Day 5

Aah... ookay. I know it's a Long Post . Here we go again.
This may help you really think next time you feel like wasting your precious life-force:

Did you all know that it takes a tremendous amount of energy for a man to produce one load of semen?
A mans semen is the highest and most precious substance in his entire body. You body takes the best of you and turn it into semen. A substance than are capable of creating a new life, a new human being. It's loaded with your genetics, parts of you and it also has a spiritual essence to it. It's sad how it's being wasted on something as useless as Porn.
"It takes 80-100 drops of blood to produce one drop of semen." I think that is very true.
Every man knows that feeling of a deep loss after every ejaculation. We all know that emptiness, that void, that numbness, the exhaustion, and a feeling of being drained. That's because you have lost a part of you. You can even see it in your own eyes. That glossy lifeless stare with whites that are red.

But you can build yourself up by learning how to not waste it anymore.

This loss of energy creates brainfog, and a slow, lazy mind. A lazy mind makes lazy choices, and lazy choices are bad choices. That lazy mind makes it more difficult for you to rebuild your energy because suddenly you are completely out of balance so thinking straight or seeing the bigger picture becomes almost impossible (or, it feels like it). High IQ and Semen Retention is fundamentally connected. That's why when you're on day 60 or 90 you find it much easier to make it to another 14 days, etc. Compared to when you started your streak, making it to day 8 was difficult enough.
When you're on a longer streak your mind is clearer, your mind is quicker, more intelligent, so decision-making is a quicker process and you make much better choices.

"Out of chyle comes blood, Out of blood comes flesh, Out of flesh comes fat, Out of fat Comes bone, Out of bone comes marrow, Out of marrow comes semen."

Interesting, because I can feel how weak I feel in my bones after an ejaculation. But on NF day 90 I literally feel the energy flow inside my bones. And according to 5000-ish years old wisdom of Taoism, sexual energy is connected to the Kidneys, and the meridian to the kidneys goes behind your legs, or in the backside of your thigh. And you can stretch this part to secure there's no leakage of this energy, and to literally also avoid wet dreams. Also according to Tao; kidney-energy are connected to the bones. Interesting...

Women do not have the benefit of producing semen. A substance (life-energy) that can be absorbed and recycled when not ejaculated for a certain time. It can build up a mans energy to much higher levels. See Buddhist monks, Yogis, etc. But at the same time it's too easy for a man to ejaculate and it takes lots of time for him to figure out that:
1. It's problematic and destructive to waste this energy,
2. How to discipline himself to not waste this energy. And..
3. How to transmute this energy into something good.

Women can however still build up their sexual energy according to Taoism. I don't know that much but according to what I've read women lose energy through their periods. They can do exercises that stop their periods (or something like that) and, in a similar way to men, they absorb their life-energy instead of wasting it. If there's a way for men to do this, there's a way for women too. But I don't know much at all.

But as I said, it's even more devastating for a man to ejaculate. (But that doesn't mean it isn't for women.)
It's not only a physical loss of a precious substance that takes time for the body to produce. But also a loss of mental energy and a loss of energy to the nervous system, and everything that goes along with it.

I read somewhere that a complete load of semen takes about 72+ days to produce, I don't know how accuerate that is. Semen consists of multiple fluids but maybe they were talking about the sperms alone. I need to tripple check that sometime. But I wouldn't be surprised if it was true because men often ejaculate weak loads when their bodies desperatley tries to replace the lost energy by rebuilding it. This damages the body, and the mind. This quicken the aging process. And it can create a sh*tload of mental problems or nervous system problems like tremors/shakings, depressions, tics/tic-movements, emotional imbalances and the list is probably never ending.

But that's not strange at all when we are talking about a loss of the most precious substance that the human body are capable of producing.

As long as your semen is inside of your body you will be okay.

Yes the substance it's in your balls, first, but from there the body starts to absorb it. I think maybe around day 90 the body starts to absorb the semen. But it's different if you live a healthy lifestyle. Then you will recover much faster.

In order to abosrb your semen you need to find ways to stop ejaculations during your sleep.
Doing kegel won't hurt if you avoid over-doing it. And stretching the backside of your thigh by standing tall, and trying to touch the floor in front of your feet, with your palms, will really help. You need to feel that uncomfortable stretching on the backside for it to work properly, and you need to do it every day before bedtime.

I know what to do, I just need to rebuild enough mental energy to even start doing it. One thing at the time. Or "One Brick per Day" and over time you've built a solid temple within yourself.

You see, these memories and insights comes back to me along with my energy coming back. The exercises (lifting weights) really helps the body to recover much faster compared to people who do NF by sitting down on their butts.

Recovery is: 30% Diet / Knowledge, and 70% is maintenance.

Even thinking about Porn or having Sexual Thoughts is a loss of energy. There's a mental energy-loss but also something mysterious, like an non-visible essence that we lose. We can only succeed with Nofap if we make a choice from Day 0 to not do it, and a deep will to preserve our sexual (life force-) energy. That's how I made it to day 124.

If you have a lazy mind you may have a subtle thought of maybe going back to porn again someday in the future.
You may think, "I will try this for a while and then I'll go back to watch that video, or look for that type of P".

A way to get around this background "automatic" thinking has been tricky to me. But I think that when you lift weights, you can see the results in the mirror over time. When you KNOW that by: preserving your semen (or seuxal energy in general, if you're a woman), then you will see much better results in the mirror, and much quicker. We want to see results, and to feel results to keep doing something.
That's how we function. Lifting Weights (and cycling, etc.) will speed up the recovery process and transmute that stored sexual energy into something that strengthens you. Then, there's a Reason for doing this. Then It's a Healing Spiral, not a Vicious Circle anymore.
That's how I see this.

If you're in a relationship and not a single "monk" like me. There's something called sexual intercourse without ejaculation. It can be incredibly healing for a man. Because it builds up his sexual energy without wasting it. But it may take some time and pracice to learn how to do it. It's not like edging to Porn, it's something else. You can probably look it up in the internet. There's probably also books if your're interested.

I hope this gives you mental clarity in some way to keep going with NF, and to refuse PMO.
With all the stress and mindfog caused by life in general and along with PMO, thinking straight becomes an impossible task.
When I get climpses of insights I write them down as a reminder to follow this path.
Like a lantern in the dark.

 

Day 45 -- halfway through!

 

Day 64

 

Day 3

 

13/90

 

Day 2/90. Urges coming through.

 

Good video. Very logical. It makes a lot of sense.

I quite recently came to my own conclusion that how men and women seek each other has a lot to do with what kind of world they are living in. Not only in terms of location but also their state of mind. One example is let say a very materialistic woman living in a densely populated city somewhere in the world. She doesn't question the purpose of life and she doesn't have any deeper thoughts about spirituality (However you personally want to define that word). This type of woman would more likely be very demanding on a mans looks, bank account, and his social status within that world.

The opposite example to that would be a woman that lives on the countryside or a small but nice town. She may ask a lot of questions about life. She may be religious or have her own spiritual point of view, or just a thinker. This type of woman are in comparison way more capable of seeing beyond "the matrix" world that city people are living in. Maybe she's a little bit of an "hippie" or have a similar lifestyle. That can of course go two ways. Some can lack "grounding" and be a littlebit "out there" or "crazy". But now I'm talking about the good side of this. I think this type of woman could be more authentic as a human being. Capable of empathy. She may have a deeper understanding of things and money doesn't impress her. Maybe she's into hunting. Maybe she knows how to get shit done and survive by herself. In contrast, the city girls could have trouble walking normally in boots because they have been physically deformed by their high heels. In other words: Physically deformed by their environment and- by their own perception of themselves, within that world, their world.

I'm just trying to explain that certain places in the world and certain lifestyles, attracts certain people with a certain level of awareness.
Or a certain level of being. World wide there's this phenomenon where people describe city people as cold and distant. And country side people are described as warm and more likable. I feel sorry for men who are involved with dating sites or dating apps. These are the worst
places in the world to look for a good woman. Their list is long but what they themselves bring to the table is next to nothing.

The scary thing is that women's behaviours and attitudes (and men's) on the internet are becoming more and more similar. They are copycats. Or in other terms. Monkey see - Monkey do. This creates a certain mentalily and behaviours amongst women that is only destructive to themselves and it repulses men and lead men to not wanting anything to do with women anymore.

In best cases men either walk their own way in life as singles or monks which can be totally fine. Or they are smart enough to look for women outside of the internet in a different world. A world where people's minds are above their typical biological/ societal programming or survival instincts. Where people see others as human beings and not as natural resources that need to be harvested by their own egos.

In modern times having a mind of your own is a rare thing. It's a precious thing. Stay strong in yourself and don't buy anything that people say to 100%. But instead, do your own research, come to your own conclusions and seek like-minded people to build strong connections with. That is part of my plan and my philosophy in life.

 

Day 59/90

 

Day 60/90

 

Day 5

 

Day 0

 

I haven't posted here in a bit...

Got back to my workout today, but I'm way weaker. I was doing 50 push-ups a day and this morning completely failed. Trying to learn better form so that's probably part of it. This last period has been a blur... Brainfog is real. I am going to have to accept that this last binge has taken a lot out of me. I'm not eating as well, not sleeping as well, stopped working out. My OCD brain is trying to tell me things like: "You can't start a new streak until you accomplish 'x' task" and that I have to do things in different orders and stuff. I am more prone to obsessing over stuff like this when I'm not doing well. Right now I just want to feel freedom from this again. I know that I have to start today, and will have to accept that I'm a lot weaker right now and will have to make the challenges I give myself more manageable. I've seen the difference between how I preform with PMO and without it for an extended period and the difference is pretty big.

I did take a huge step in deleting my porn collection. It was like... about 13k files and I'm pretty sure it was reduced before. Most of it was just stuff I looked at for like a second and just felt the need to horde...