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P.A.W.S. - what are they, cure, duration

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Fenix Rising, May 12, 2019.

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  1. Ezpz

    Ezpz Fapstronaut

    Hello guys, i have been lurking around on this forum again of late. Some of you may remember me from a while ago as i use to be very active on this forum looking for answers, like you. It has been a 5 or 6 year journey so far, who knows as ive lost track or how long its been at this point.

    PAWS is something that still plagues my existence. My relapse after 16 months of no pmo broke me into pieces. The thought of starting again, i could not do take. Ive spent the last year and a half struggling to try and get some sort of streak going. I am on 7 days now, i have not relapsed this year and of course i do not plan to.

    Its nice to come back to this forum and see that i am not alone in my struggles. I will continue my struggles for as long as it takes, because there is nothing else to be done. My hope is that i can get back to my previous efforts of 16 months and beyond.

    I will probably start being more active on these forums now as some form of hope. I would also like to say that im on ssris to try and cope with the withdrawals. I can probably elaborate on that another time.

    Hope all continues to stay pmo free
     
  2. Just an update:-

    I am 262 days free from PM( & any O due to PM) without any relapse.Whatever ejaculations I had during this are either due to wetdreams and try to rewire with wife.I am feeling much better than from where I started.I have better energy ,more time, slightly better concentration and patience.Recently I have started to feel normal but that last only for 5-10 minutes and fade away. I feel self motivated to do better in this life changing journey.

    Having said all above ,I must admit that withdrawals are still potent and alive. like pain in lower legs,back,left knee,mood swings,brain fog and I'm in exhaustion and fatigue state most of times.My stomach still feels bloated even if I take really good diet without anything from processed industry.Withdrawals are real and this is the worst of all I think.i don't had any other addiction ,so I'm not aware what withdraws are .I was just going through like that thinking why I feel like this.For first 2 months when I started this streak I felt really good.may be those times I was regular at yoga & exercise but then I became irregular.Except those 2 months ,all these 8 1/2 months I felt horrible.That worst these withdraws are.Mainly after a wet dream or ejaculation it becomes worst and haunt me for 3-4 days then things get a bit better.Specially ejaculations whenever I try to rewire with wife effects more than any wet dreams.

    Second ,my sleep quality is still a big issue.i daily take 7-8 hours sleep but still don't feel rested and refreshed.

    Thirdly my PIED ,PE & ED still persistent with almost zero libido.Most of times I'm in fatigue and exhaustive stage.I tried almost everything to recover PE but later realised that I have ED and that must be improved first to do anything.Intresting thing is that when I was addicted we used to have sex.I was not very hard and had ED & PE issues but still we had sex but strangely after quitting PMO I'm unable to have sex at all.I ejaculate within seconds without any piv and it's persistent.Its very strange.So I reduced the frequency only once a month but I want to rewire myself to normal sex with a real person.Lets see how it goes.i want to cure it desperately.

    I'm still going through withdraws and I'm committed to cross the line this time and prepared for whatever time it takes.Overall I feel better now and I'm motivated.I have no other issues like anxiety , depression or anything except to those I listed above and I believe all are only because of this prolonged PMO addiction for 19-20 years.I started M at 17 then P at 24 and hight speed P at 30.I am 36 now. Means all these years I Oed numerous times doing all this shit.And it's not easy to recover and unwire a long addicted brain like this.I am aware of it.I am taking that atleast it'll take 20-24 months for me to get normal considering prolonged addiction.And I'm nowhere near recovery ,I have walked only 1/3 path probably as on day.

    This thread and mostly long time recoverors have really helped me to understand what's going on and how it all goes even though we all have different durations and conditions.lets see when I'll cross the line for which I'm determined.

    Thanks to all.
     
    Freeddom_Taker and Dave G 123 like this.
  3. KaliYugaWarrior

    KaliYugaWarrior Fapstronaut

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    Brothers, do not take that poison (vax) unless you have strong immunity... I've been suffering really badly since I took it. I already had tons of issues and with no muscle, the psoriasis that has happened because of that shit is burning me. I can't sleep at all. It has spread to my arms and thigh. My entire back is covered with it. I've tried every alternative treatment but a lot of them are time consuming and I'm so bloody tired of finding a cure now for this with least side effects. I wish that shit would have just killed me instead.

    Anyway, Ijust wanted to inform you lads, choice is yours.

    Until next time.
     
    clapas and TBOTE like this.
  4. TBOTE

    TBOTE Fapstronaut

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    Everyone here should take this as a warning. The media would say this such case is rare, but it's not whatsoever. Speaking of rare, everyone here should check out @theysayitsrare on Twitter. It's an account that reposts thousands of testimonies from those who have taken it, reporting issues just like this one. Anastaci91 is an amazing group chat on Telegram which also holds plenty of video/photo testimony.


    Reminder that all of these vaccine companies are corrupt. The information is easily obtainable. The funniest of them all is Pfizer, which is I would say the most taken shot in the world possibly, had to pay a $2.3 billion dollar settlement because they lost a case on health care fraud.

    https://www.justice.gov/opa/pr/just...gest-health-care-fraud-settlement-its-history

    (This is literally the Department of Justice website).

    If you look into it, every single vaccine/pharma company has real issues, not just Pfizer. It kills me to see that when this issue is confronted, it becomes a political matter and people will automatically attack you to defend it, considering their political side supports it. This shouldn't be such thing whatsoever.
     
    clapas and KaliYugaWarrior like this.
  5. Dave G 123

    Dave G 123 Fapstronaut

    Can we leave our politics at the door and keep this thread on topic?
     
    humbleone, HiLoNeo, Ezpz and 3 others like this.
  6. UWSDave

    UWSDave Fapstronaut

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    The media and our leaders also want you to believe that Long Covid, a horrifying disease that can be much worse than PAWS, is rare too. I know people that have been left with permanent neurological problems as a result of Covid (and in fact I always wonder if I had a weird case of Covid at one point too and that's what explains some of the problems I attribute to PAWS).

    I'm not saying some people don't have side effects from the vaccines (as they do from any vaccine), but it's all about risks and benefits. Heck, you can look back at my post history and see that I was initially apprehensive about it too. But I'd much rather take my chances with a vaccine than with Covid itself. If a vaccine can mess me up given my fragile state, then I'm sure the actual disease would do much worse.

    And yes, big pharma is bad, but I'm not so much worried about their vaccines being actual poison than I am about the fact that they make sure only rich countries can afford them, and people in the rest of the world are on their own.
     
  7. Dave G 123

    Dave G 123 Fapstronaut

    There are very few places to talk about the long term effects of excessive PMO - in fact barely anywhere at all. Many people come to this thread looking for answers about why they are dealing with life-changing problems that they barely understand, and for which no-one outside of Nofap has answers; they already have to wade through an absolute ton of text in this thread alone, to find the parts that are relevant. Posts like these are simply diluting the useful, helpful stuff with stuff that isn't.

    Accuse me of living under a rock if you want, but I want to protect this thread, and prevent it from being hi-jacked by something that has little relevance to PAWS. There are many other places to talk about vaccines, COVID, and pretty much anything else. So, in the spirit of giving a damn about people who are suffering serious long term health problems caused by the porn-industrial complex (like me), can we keep it on topic?
     
  8. Bright Man-02

    Bright Man-02 Fapstronaut

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    Guys! who is taking supplements during PAWS for energy and focus? like vitamin b-12, and how is it helping with energy???

    I am exhausted to the bone and don't know what to do, I am extremely down right now and have hard time even writing this paragraph.

    Is every PAWS sufferer disabled like me or mine is tougher?????????

    Sorry for the such a negative vibe, but could anyone help???
     
    Dave G 123 likes this.
  9. Monkeyboyab2c

    Monkeyboyab2c Fapstronaut

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    All I know is every time someone posts something about the vaccine one way or the other this forum goes dead for a couple of weeks.
     
    Dave G 123 likes this.
  10. Monkeyboyab2c

    Monkeyboyab2c Fapstronaut

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    Hey Bro I’m sorry you are going through this. I don’t supplement with anything really. I drink Kombucha every day which I say is for gut health but mostly I just like it. I do deal with crippling exhaustion from time to time. It’s a lot better than it was but in the beginning it was pretty awful.
    I know you don’t feel like doing much at all but I know for me walking helped a lot. It helped me clear my head and gave me something physical to do that wasn't too much for my system to handle. The goal of going further every day or making it up this hill or that hill for the first time felt like real progress in a recovery that seems unending.
    I totally understand if you are not there yet. I’m just letting you know what helped me.
     
    Dave G 123 likes this.
  11. humbleone

    humbleone Fapstronaut

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    Yeah agreed.

    Im still here nearly 3 years on lol, this is the craziest journey of my entire life, I couldnt have imagined 5 years ago that this was even a possibility.

    Im stuck in perpetual PAWS - its wayyyyy better than in the beginning, but mostly because its humbled me and brought me to my knees, and Ive built lots of coping mechanisms, I feel truly sorry for anyone who had to do this journey whilst having to hold down a job etc

    I just cant seem to build up another streak, its almost becuase I know if I go 90 or 180 days Ill still feel like shit, theres no motivation

    I keep doing 30 day streaks; relapse to one night stands and sex.
     
    Freeddom_Taker likes this.
  12. Ezpz

    Ezpz Fapstronaut

    Been there. I spent most of last year struggling to come to terms with my relapse after 16 months pmo free and knowing that it will take longer than that to recover.

    For me the shitty withdrawal symptoms cause all of my relapses. So it becomes a cycle of constantly seeking relief of pain. I started this journey 5 years ago, never thought id still be struggling with these symptoms.

    Not much we can do really but continue to push forward.
     
    Dave G 123 and Freeddom_Taker like this.
  13.  
  14. At least you can have sex...
     
  15. Eternal Struggler

    Eternal Struggler Fapstronaut

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    I dont think MO/ Sex relapses (without porn of course) slow down recovery tbh, atleast they didnt with me.

    Still, they definitely can make your symptoms worse. Back when I would spend 4 hours a day browsing benzobuddies looking for success stories, I remember seeing many people talking about sex flaring up their paws / protracted symptoms, even thought their addiction had nothing to do with pmo.

    http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=192319.0

    So TL;DR: dont do it, but If you have to do It (like for saving your marriage or smth) It probably wont do shit other than make your feel bad for a while.
     
    Redemptionisrequired likes this.
  16. Eternal Struggler

    Eternal Struggler Fapstronaut

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    You are 100% right. I'd much rather die from the so called side effects of the vaccine than to go through anything remotely similar to paws again like long covid
     
    UWSDave and Dave G 123 like this.
  17. mentorr

    mentorr Fapstronaut

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    Hi guys, a quick update from me:

    This weekend marked 2.5 years recovery from a 16+ year addiction. After waiting for so long I decided to go ahead and initiate sex with someone. We went for drinks and then went back to hers. I managed to pull together a pretty poor erection (40-50%) and came almost instantly. Usually I would be super embarrassed and ashamed but after 2.5 years of recovering I honestly did not care. We shrugged it off and laughed and I told her ‘it’s been a while’.

    Usually after sex I drop back into a flatline and life turns bad. While right now I don’t feel perfect, things are definitely not as bad as they were a year ago. The main symptoms I am experiencing at the moment are:

    Fatigue! Upon waking in the morning I am now exhausted. It’s that feeling of sleeping 7-8 hours and not wanting to get out of bed in the morning.

    My libido has definitely dropped. However it is nowhere near as low as when I relapsed before. There is still a light hum to my libido, but that raw craving for intimacy 24/7 is gone.

    I have a very very light feeling of anxiety/depression. It is safe to say that the depression/anxiety is just a symptom of low energy. I have recently started seeing a psychotherapist and the advice provided for handling a flatline (anxiety/depression) is to face the feelings head on. When I wake up in the morning and feel depressed or anxious do you know what I do? I welcome it. I sit in the feeling for a few minutes knowing that I am simply experiencing a chemical imbalance and that I will ‘level out’ emotionally soon. I know my PIED is improving and that if I continue being patient I will be back to normal soon.

    To summarise, it sucks that I couldn’t have amazing sex and that I still need more time to to recover fully, but I think I am done with sitting around and waiting to be better. I think for me it’s time to ‘get back on the horse’ and kick start my life.

    Do not get me wrong, I do not experience solid morning wood every day, and in someways I still feel emotionally numb a lot of the time. But I think the idea of waking up one day and everything being ‘back to normal’ is unlikely to happen for a lot of us here.

    Despite not being 100% I have decided to commit to building an even better life than the one I had before, whether my dick currently works or not.
     
  18. Eternal Struggler

    Eternal Struggler Fapstronaut

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    Thats not true. Many people do recover overnight.

    I remember one extreme case from benzobuddies (ik its not the same as porn paws but still) where some guy woke up completely healed after suffering from extreme protracted benzo withdrawal after 5 YEARS.

    And although I didnt heal overnight, my experience was quite similar. I did improve a lot during the first 20 months, but I was still not there at all, and anhedonia / lack of concentration had barely improved. Things only got back to what they were before porn when I started getting waves between months 20-24, out of nowhere I started having 80-90% normal days for a week, that would be followed by a week of feeling worse than month 1. I kept having that cycle of feeling good and them feeling bad for 4 months until I was definitely back to my pre-abuse baseline again.

    What is interesting is that this cycle was the same thing I had experienced back when I had been thrown into PAWS 3 years ago. I woke up feeling awful one day, only to feel completely normal in the next. Until I started having only bad days for 1 year and 8 months.

    Basically, my theory is that paws begins and ends with waves, and thats why people who go through short paws report having waves since the begining.
     
    zander13 and UWSDave like this.
  19. mentorr

    mentorr Fapstronaut

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    I think the point here is that this is your experience. While many people recover overnight my statement is that most people won’t. Not that people don’t.

    The first example you gave refers to someone recovering from benzos and not PMO. Is benzo recovery the same as PMO recovery would be my question.

    I am not saying that people won’t recover overnight, some most certainly will. But if we look at some of the veterans of this forum who have recovered before us, Don Quixote, Big Lebowski, Grateful Retainer etc the majority had a gradual recovery.

    I was previously experiencing waves but towards the end of this year I seemed to stop experiencing them. I think it’s a topic that is worth looking deeper into, but based on the stories in (and outside) of this forum I have noticed that some recover gradually and overs recover overnight. It’s a topic worth looking into.
     
  20. Monkeyboyab2c

    Monkeyboyab2c Fapstronaut

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    I can’t tell you guys how good it is to see everyone active again. I get so freaking lonely going through this. On a bit of a triumphant note this Friday marks 2 years I will be Porn and Masturbation free. There are a lot of things I credit that to but one of the biggest ones is this thread. I can’t tell you how many times my mind has gone to some pretty scary places and I’ve come back here to read everyone’s experience to bring me back to sanity. It really does help. Sometimes it’s the only thing that helps in the moment. Thanks a lot guys!
     
    Dave G 123 and UWSDave like this.

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