Effect of starting porn at a young age

I am realizing that even though we have the same pmo issues, our cases can be very different and the same solutions may not work for everyone. I had not thought of this, but some people started pmo at a very young age and perhaps never even had normal sex lives with women. I have been wondering why it may be very difficult for some people to stop than others, but this could definitely be one of the situations.



In my case, introduced to porn at 12. Didn't have much access if thought I looked. Got full access and privacy when I went to uni at about 20 and had pied by 21/22. Was hooked for nearly 8 years using ed pills etc. Then did clean 90 day reboot and fixed pied etc.

So this is just a reminder for everyone to stay strong! Whatever you do, just stop pmo, don't peek, don't fantasize, don't touch etc. Fight as hard as you can.

 

I get you. I also saw one porn pic at around 12, and even though I did not have access to p I started m with bikini pictures, movie sex scenes etc. So definitely experiences in childhood/teenage hood can quickly cause pmo use. But take heart, work to kick the habit. Thanks for sharing.

 

In my experience I did the full 90 days without any sex, so I cannot comment on if the healing can occur faster from that streak. Mind you my streak was very clean i.e. I did not peek, stopped sexual thoughts (and by day 40 I could easily ignore them) and no touching at all. I was failing uni and was final year, so I did nofap which improved my focus and I had more time. I was too panicked about uni to be thinking of other things.

On day 91 I visited an escort (I didn't care if I failed with an escort) and I was completely fine. I was still very anxious and kept thinking I would fail but it just stayed, even through the panic.

However, I have seen posts here about pied being healed faster. I think this depends on circumstances e.g. duration of pmo use, how bad the addiction had escalated etc. I was almost 8 years with pied so I didn't event expect to be healed by day 90 based on the posts I had seen here(That's why I decided to do a very clean no pmo, and it worked by day 90). In my current streak, I relapsed but it has not been bad as before, I have had sex from day 38 two weekends in a row now with the girl I am seeing. So I would say pied healing duration depends on your situation, but if it's your first time doing a streak to fix pied I'd recommend that 90 days. If you have an understanding partner then start trying it out after day 30.

 

Thank you for sharing. I got anxiety and depression (clinically diagnosed on meds and seeing a therapist for a few months). Anxiety was the first symptom I think as feelings of shame, and constantly wanting to get back to your closed off space subconsciously make you feel and get worse. You soon start getting worse at social interactions because of these and that messes things up further.

My depression was because pmo and pied, and anxiety started affecting my focus and performance in uni, my gf then realised and that the relationship got bad, financial issues because my progress had slowed etc. I slowly got depressed.

So I believe that other than anxiety that can be directly caused by getting worse at social interactions etc, my mental health issues stemmed from my overall worsening life conditions under pmo. I think most of us here are stagnated in life, don't have a meaningful career or job, social anxiety, can't approach women and no intimate relationships etc. All those things will slowly mess you up. And if you complete nofap while not trying to fix these parts of life we slowly get back to pmo.

 

I have to agree with this comment. See a doctor and get professional help. But the most you get from a pmo addiction is anxiety especially with pied and losing confidence around people. Depression may results if pmo use is long term and our lives begin to suffer e.g. poor performance, no relationships/sex, no social life, poor grades/ career etc. We can sloly get into depression with years of this. Otherwise, I don't think pmo will cause anything else.

 

Glad the post helped in some way. I didn't consider pied too for ages, just started using pills which of course didn't end well. But after 8 years of pills etc pied went away after 90 days (I must add that the streak was very clean though). So yes, pied is a thing and I especially hate the anxiety it causes when it comes to sex.

 

I agree, willpower does play a role but I think we are here mainly because we do not have that. I don't think willpower is the word, maybe discipline to stick to a plan that keeps pmo impossible to do. And I believe your approach is correct, "we don't want to be someone who is trying not to PMO, we want to be someone who doesn't PMO". And many healthy adults don't even PMO.

In summary, I think I succeeded because of two things: 1.) I was living with family in a house with no privacy for months. So I just had to keep myself in view of people. 2.) I had messed up my life and was on the brink of failing uni too, if that was not reason enough to quit I don't what would. Here's a bit more detail to those two points.

I got lucky in a way, first time I tried nofap was during the pandemic and I had gone back to live with family. And there was virtually no privacy in the house unless I stayed up late or tried to sneak in the bedroom. (Bedrooms were shared, all doors were always open etc.) I used that to my advantage and slept by 10pm each day and woke up when someone was already up. Then I stopped watching anything remotely sexual e.g music videos, social media. If I inadvertently found myself watching a sex scene in a movie I'd walk away asap. So I don't think I had strong willpower, I think I just forced myself to be with people all the time. We will always lack the willpower to stop ourselves from pmo in private, but we improve our willpower to keep ourselves in places/ situations where we simply cannot pmo.

It's important that you mention that; I think most people are never honest that they are still peeking, touching (in whatever capacity), or having sexual thoughts and fantasies. I believe there is 'quality in nofap', and these things make quiting much more difficult. Someone who allows this also still has not made up their mind to quit. It's like compromised to only do a small part of PMO, but this does not work with an addiction. I was very strict with myself and I didn't do any of that; I remember seeing a marked difference in stopping sexual thoughts. I would count to 5 repeatedly if I had any sexual thoughts or urges and go for a walk or just change what I was doing. I'd go to the gym if urges were strong and I couldn't concentrate on work. The first 3 weeks it felt like I was constantly fighting myself from having sexual thoughts, like I was crazy or something. By day 30 it was getting easier as if my head was getting clearer. I also started to gradually forget p scenes and even p star names. I remember I used to fantasize before bed and that stopped too, I'd just read or watch something, get tired and fall asleep. I was almost always tired by evening because of gym and work anyway.

 

I think you are spot on, and that anecdote describes the pmo addiction well. Only thing I would add is that msot of us in pmo have issues in life too e.g. don't have relationships/friends, social anxiety, stagnated in jobs/ academics, no proper goals we are trying to work on each day etc. These things bring meaning and drive in life. We can quit pmo for a year ut if we still have no social circles, or feel like we are struggling in life the stress (whether conscious or subconscious) will get us back to pmo. When you are serious about goals (career/academic), have friends/family, and your own healthy activities like gym etc. You don't even have time for anything else, heck you don't have time for all these in a week. So we need to fix our issues too, not just pmo.