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Greater overall sense of happiness and joy

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Wallfacer, May 5, 2022.

  1. Wallfacer

    Wallfacer Fapstronaut

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    I've decided to talk to more people when I'm not at home, and so far, it has been great. I think combined with nofap this has boosted my overall happiness, as nowadays I wake up looking forward to the day ahead. This has been a huge change for me, because last year, I hated my acquaintances circle and feel no much connection with it. This year, I've become better friends with many acquaintances and man they are fun to talk to!

    I do think this is partially helped by NoFap, because whenever I relapse, I feel like shit and just generally dislike myself. When I'm on NoFap, I wake up with a smile and feel an ever present sense of joy and happiness. I am more passionate about the project I'm working on, and I always enjoy myself when socializing.

    I have installed several blockers on my computer, added openDNS family shield on my router(and changed the password for my routerLogin), put SelfControl app on 1 week and locked away sites like instagram, youtube, and reddit, so that I know that I can work using my computer without worrying about looking up dirty stuff. For my phone, it is harder to do these things, so I made a rule in which I am not allowed to use it in bed, and when I get urges I must put my phone away and not use it till next hour.

    And I am aware of the potential relapse. A good analogy would be running against a moving stair- I have to keep going forward to not be pushed backward. There will be no shortcuts. some of my daily plans are
    1, workout 45 min
    2, sleep before 9:30
    3, read nofap related content for 30 min,
    4, set up a plan for the day and focus on it, no distraction until i reach a planned rest(I think this is important, because I've realized I actually get more tired when I'm distracted. When I throw myself at a plan, I feel a general higher sense of happiness and purpose and feels more energetic and creative)
    5, meditate 10 min a day
    In my past, I have setted up these plans before, but I sometimes fail to execute them. In fact, I have not once experience a situation where I achieved all 5 of these plans and still relapse. Of course, just like you can only grow muscle if you give an exercise all that you've got, this will only work if I am disciplined in its execution. For the past few days I have not been very disciplined in its execution, but after experiencing the great benefit of an early sleep yesterday, I am going start sleeping early and execute the plan- because I know even if I just slack off on one of the clauses, my chance of relapsing will increase, and I cannot let that happen because I don't want porn to take away my current sense of joy. My sense of happiness, interest, creativity, and passion has dramatically increased and I love my life.
     
    OliverJoseph and Assyrian like this.
  2. Very motivating and you are doing very good work, keep it up.
     
    Wallfacer likes this.
  3. Wallfacer

    Wallfacer Fapstronaut

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    thanks man!
     
  4. Wallfacer

    Wallfacer Fapstronaut

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    yesterday i slacked off mostly because of lack of a plan. The problem is that I'm not really tired despite telling myself so, and it really needs a strict time plan to do something despite feeling tired.
    didn't workout, sleep early, nor meditate, so I feel a bit tired this morning.
     
    lunarlanding91 likes this.
  5. WalktheLine

    WalktheLine Fapstronaut

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    Thanks so much for this...
    It is stupid to think I can kind of just use antidotes without an overall plan of discipline and actually I kind of like discipline that's what I need my life works better with discipline Gentle consistent discipline
     
  6. Wallfacer

    Wallfacer Fapstronaut

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    yeah, no problem! I've noticed that the pattern for relapse for me is this: no concrete time-plan -> rationalizing not focusing and efficiently working -> boredom -> urges -> relapse or flatline
    Last weekend I've been staying up to work on my project, and did not feel urges at all. Yesterday, however, because I told myself to just "relax", I actually felt a lot of boredom, desperation, stress, and urges to relieve those by relapsing. Good thing I did not listen to those urge(watched a bunch of nofap videos, mostly by Pinnacle of Man, he has very good argument on redefining nofap and how nofap alone is destined to fail since that means you are not using the energy on somewhere else/did pushups/ also thanks to multiple layer of porn blocking on my computer- covenantEyes, selfControl app, familyShield DNS router blocking). I think it is very important for me to have a time- schedule related to my purpose, and I just list down very specific things to do and throw myself at them in chunks of intense focus time. This way, I often work long hours while forgetting about time and distraction, and the nagging voice of "youve done enough, go take a break" wont be there because i know that I have not yet completed the schedule and that break is schedule for later. This reduces a lot of boredom and is very effective for me personally since boredom accounts for probably more than half of my relapses.
     
    Last edited: May 11, 2022
  7. newbikeman

    newbikeman Fapstronaut

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    I am motivated! Thanks Wallfacer! Day 2.
     
    Wallfacer likes this.
  8. OliverJoseph

    OliverJoseph Fapstronaut

    This motivates me too. Read NoFap Content for 30 Minutes a day is great. „Energy flows where attention goes“. I will start with at least 15 Minutes a day, too :)
     
    Wallfacer likes this.

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