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Beware, this summer...

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Warrior4Freedom, May 11, 2022.

  1. Warrior4Freedom

    Warrior4Freedom Fapstronaut

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    This thread is for us who live in more northern lands where we get summer for a few months a year.

    We all know that, immediately, once warm weather arrives, girls immediately start wearing the shortest of dresses, shorts and skirts.

    My friends, let this thread be a reminder to resist, restrain and refuse watching. Retain your energy and essence. Sure, the weather is fine and they want to dress accordingly, but remember that much of this is SHOWING OFF what they've got, and most could NOT care less about reciprocating the energy and attention you give them when you ogling/staring/glancing/watching.

    Restraining and redirecting your energy makes you powerful. It brings it back into your system to gain drive, clarity, strength and confidence throughout the day.

    Remember this thread, guys. Don't be sapped this summer. Post your experiences if you like, as well, as the season progresses.
     
  2. @Warrior4Freedom

    1. I think that most of the guys prefer girls that don't show off and are decent.
    2. I also think that sex and showing off is mostly due to culture and society.
    3. In other words for financial benefit of the few: young generation is exposed to the dangers of porn and addiction.
    4. It can be taxed so politicians do support this enterprise.
    5. A lot of people get confused on what is attractive and what not.
    6. I think that Muslim countries have actually nailed it.
    7. They put family first. Westerners put money first generation after generation is paying the price.
    8. I am neither Arab nor Muslim but I am able to appreciate idea when I see a good one.
     
    Phoenix Beyond likes this.
  3. Raven King

    Raven King Fapstronaut

    I don’t think Muslim countries have nailed it. Quite the opposite. Putting a burka on a hot women is not solving men being pervs. Men solve the problem of men being pervs. The problem is not women or how they dress, the problem is a lack of restraint in men.
    It's natural to be attracted to pretty women. But it is A CHOICE to fantazise about women.

    We have to work on ourselves, and not put the blame on women for our lack of sexual restraint.
     
  4. JoeinUSA

    JoeinUSA Fapstronaut

    I don't think the emphasis is on Muslim/Arab vs. Western countries per se, but rather on Sociocentric Cultures (where family is prioritized before the individual, e.g, Middle East, Asian, Latino/Hispanic, Native cultures, etc.) vs. Egocentric Cultures (where the individual trumps over the family, e.g., European and North American).
     
    MoutainGoat likes this.
  5. Warrior4Freedom

    Warrior4Freedom Fapstronaut

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    1. Agree.
    2. Agree.
    3. Agree.
    4. Agree.
    5. Agree.
    6. I think they went too extreme. They actually are among the horniest demographics, precisely because they are so repressed. Many of them post here. You often hear about women getting harassed and assaulted in public transit in those countries. In Western countries, they go wild (unbeknownst to their communities).
    7. Again, they do it to the extreme. Very insular and exclusionary. A lot of suffering goes on in such families. Don't think they don't prioritize money, either. It's the reason many of them are in the West, and seem to love shopping malls despite what they say about Western haram.
    8. Too extreme, that idea. Women weren't meant to cover up themselves that much. It's extremely barbaric.
     
    Phoenix Beyond likes this.
  6. Warrior4Freedom

    Warrior4Freedom Fapstronaut

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    Well put. Accurate.
     
  7. CommonUser

    CommonUser Fapstronaut

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    Getting some eye candy every once in a while is not a bad thing as long you understand it starts and ends with that.
     
    wastewater likes this.
  8. OhWhenThe

    OhWhenThe Fapstronaut

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    I never feel better after looking, all it does is bring frustration and a little despair ... yet I still do it.

    I was out earlier and this girl with the absolute perfect figure started walking in front of me and my eyes were just glued to her, it's ridiculous really. I think a plane could have fallen out of the sky right next to me and I wouldn't have averted my attention. When I was PMO'ing I would still look but not to this degree, I think my objectification and infatuation of women is getting worse if anything lol.
     
  9. CommonUser

    CommonUser Fapstronaut

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    Dude, being attracted to what you are attracted is not objectification. Accepting that will actually improve your situation, as you will not see it as this tempting but forbidden thing but something more common, which will result and you doing it less.
     
    Warrior4Freedom likes this.
  10. Warrior4Freedom

    Warrior4Freedom Fapstronaut

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    Very true; this is what I was going to say to CommonUser's post above. You never feel better after looking, and it destabilizes your focus, peace and mental stability. Most of those females you look at are not available too. I can't tell you how many times I saw a woman, entertained the notion of going to talk to her but chose my Focus and Peace instead, then her bf/husband/significant other showed up. Can you imagine how awkward it would've been if I followed my urges? Yikes.

    The more is choose to Focus is the stronger I become. I become more mindful, alert and agile. More mentally clear and more detached when faced with tempting stimuli. You have to stick with it: don't look at tempting female forms, and it gets easier as more and more show up in your everyday life.
     
    Last edited: May 21, 2022
    KevinesKay likes this.
  11. Warrior4Freedom

    Warrior4Freedom Fapstronaut

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    You possibly do have a point here, but some of us are way too vulnerable and in the fog of lust and instability mentally to reach this point, as you can see from OhWhenThe's first answer.
     
    KevinesKay likes this.
  12. CommonUser

    CommonUser Fapstronaut

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    Well, that's something you need to work on dude. With your current view, you already feel bad even before looking, because you want to do something you believe is wrong, looking just confirms your fears.

    I am not someone who leaves his house a lot, and when I do, there are attractive women, and just like you, I try to not look at them, first of all because staring at people is rude, and second because I feel I am not good looking enough to like women (That's another issue), but the more you repeat "Don't do it", the more you will want to do it. It is better to live your life, and if you happen to look, just say "Cool" and move on.
     
    Just V likes this.
  13. Back to the topic: you're right man! I'm already feeling my veteran's "addict's sense" (like a "spider's sense"?) tingling. Danger, danger everywhere, but we can deal with that. Look away, at all times. Avoid crowded places, beaches, and other "places of a higher risk" as much as you can. Redirect your thoughts when unexpected glances happen. It's been helping me so far.
     
    Zapy97, Ebervg and Warrior4Freedom like this.
  14. dneys

    dneys Fapstronaut

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    I'm on day 2 of nofap and I feel that I already search for arousing images outside. I look at women quite agressively. I thought what triggered me the most was Instagram (that's why a while ago I put all the model accounts in an account of its own, so I only went there when I wanted to, and it's harder to access since I have to log out) but not only. I want to see if, as nofap progresses, it can get easier. I want to recover energy since I've been feeling very tired every day and I don't even work.
     
  15. OhWhenThe

    OhWhenThe Fapstronaut

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    Tbh it's not so much that I feel that looking at women is morally wrong or something, it's just that after I have, I realise that it was in no way beneficial to me and only serves to feed a desire that won't be met .. which then brings on feelings such as frustration and sadness. Hopefully I'll get to the point where I can see a hot girl and then quickly move on but I'm not there yet, it's better for me if I just try not to look in the first place.

    Today I did something I haven't done during this entire streak, I searched up something I shouldn't have. I didn't click on any of the links but I was teetering on the edge and had to enable my blocker for the first time in months to ensure I didn't do something I was going to regret. I believe that this was in large part due to me staring at that girl yesterday, had I not seen her or just looked away I probably wouldn't have felt urged to go "searching" for more.

    I know this is all down to me and not what women are wearing but I guess I'm just extremely sensitive to the female form so there's nothing good that can come from me looking at them.
     
    Last edited: May 22, 2022
  16. Same man i feel bad for looking at girls in public and after looking i just regret it instantantly because i get sexual thoughts and which then makes me almost want to view porn. But it's really all on me and i hope that in the future when i haven't viewed any porn in a long time i will just move on with my day and not get urges to look at porn.
     
    Warrior4Freedom likes this.
  17. Warrior4Freedom

    Warrior4Freedom Fapstronaut

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    I agree. Your post is exactly how I feel, and girls who dress that way do not care how you react to them. Which they shouldn't, but when they do it with the covert intention to imply sexual availability and to arouse the attention of vulnerable, masculinely-shamed men, you can tell it's a power-trip they're on with zero intention of reciprocating a man's attention. You're right - watching brings frustration and sadness because your energy and attention is not requited or reciprocated, not even with a hello or a friendly acknowledgment. They only look to see if you're looking to give them that ego boost. I've found I take my power back when I don't look, and will do so for as long as I need to.
     
    KevinesKay and malt3439 like this.
  18. Warrior4Freedom

    Warrior4Freedom Fapstronaut

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    Agree. Sometimes going to such lengths helps. Unfortunate, because who doesn't love the beach, but protecting one's peace is more important.
     
    malt3439 likes this.
  19. Warrior4Freedom

    Warrior4Freedom Fapstronaut

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    Case in point - as I was in my car today, a girl in front of me stood seductively, going on tippy toes to highlight her ass(ets) and watched me to see if I'd bite. She was with a friend. A few summers ago, a similar scenario. Young girls - they don't really have formed brains maturity-wise yet, so they use whatever else about them physically that's already formed. Their form. Physical form.

    Honestly, if I took in every single female form I saw today on a warm summer afternoon, I'd be a mere wisp of a man. Just blubber. Nothing left. You have no idea how sexy summers can destabilize you. Maybe it's just me - sometimes I wonder if I am a descendant of Genghis Khan who (as it's implied) went around boning every woman he came across. Except, these days, you cannot, and you should not. But girls DO NOT CARE if you're enticed and aroused by what they choose to tantalizingly wear throughout the day. They do not care if you end up pathetically PMO-ing at the end of a long day based on the stimuli they wore. They don't care about that energy-loss, or the depths of despair that leads you to; those dark nights of the soul. Remember that. Take your power back. Don't even "take it back". Keep it to Yourself.
     
    KevinesKay and Overforme like this.
  20. Giuseppe

    Giuseppe Fapstronaut

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    The problem with these types of responses is that they are partially true. It is true that it is every man and woman's duty to foster self-control and restraint. It is untrue in saying every man and woman does not have a duty to help foster such a society by moderating the way they speak, behave, and dress.

    A society which says "all people must control themselves" but then acts in a way which throws modesty and decorum into the wind as unnecessary to achieve that end is a society which says it wants one thing, while doing another.

    Where Muslim societies fail is not that they believe men and women should be helping each other by how they dress, but rather in the extreme application of that truth. The society which promotes the burka and the society which promotes the mini-skirt are two examples of opposite extremes.

    A healthy society is in the middle of these two.
     

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