The Lord of the Rings Challenge

Checking in, done 2x cold showers + Win Hof breathing, also done a solid workout and went to the restaurant with my wife.

I think Win Hof breathing helps me with the stress already.

Also I've watched this video



Have a nice weekend

 

Really struggling today. I am having huge urges. Could not figure out why. I just figured it out. Last time I had a long streak I relapsed the day after talking to my dad. I had not talked to him this whole streak. Last night I talked to him and I have been pounded with incredible urges all day. I have lots of trauma from my dad. I need to be careful after taking to him. I have not given in to the urges. Thank God. Hopefully soon they will be gone.

 

Glad to hear that brother!

 

Day 114
Yesterday I couldn't write .. After doing a lot of work , I fell to the bed as a tree .. Good weekend brothers!. @hardcore_detox I did wimhof breathing according to your post's instructions , before writing my ideas... Now my mind is very clear
@Paul S. Brother, I hope all is well with you...I didn't see you about 4 days..

Nice to hear that brother!

 

Day 3 complete!

@RiseToGreatness I'm very happy to hear that things are improving with your wife! Since you are a man and woman joined in marriage, the two of you are no longer two, but you have become one flesh. She is as close to you as your own body, and vice versa. As long as PMO remains, everything that you do to yourself hurts her, and all the ways you hurt her come back to hurt you. Keep up the good work! Never let anything come between you.

@Anew2019 It's a good sign of progress that you were able to recognize the source of your urges and to be aware of how you can handle them. I'm sorry to hear about your relationship with your father. Please remember that no matter what things look like here on earth, you have a good Father in heaven who always looks upon you with joy and affection. I once heard a very cool explanation stemming from God's relationship with time. Whenever we see something very beautiful for the first time, we are filled with a sense of awe and delight. God, since He is outside of time, sees all of it at once. It's like every moment that passes is something He is seeing for the first time, including us. The sight of us always fills God with awe and delight. He delights in us!

St. Thomas Aquinas, pray for us!

 

Day 8
Got to hang out with a close friend who's been gone for a couple months and it was a great time. Saw a movie that thankfully only had one sexual scene that I was able to avoid. Overall a great day

 

25

 

Check in day 21

 

@Gallade_Templar Oh my word that is one of the most beautiful things I have ever heard. How every moment we are new to God! That’s so amazing. Thank you!

 

Day 19 - Bree sends aid! Bill, a strong and kind pony, joins your quest by carrying rations and items.
Quest Aid – Bill, the pony

Today alright but I felt better yesterday. I'm not too bad.

I might hit the gym after I write this or read up some more information here in the forums or do something else.

Yesterday, there was a new good looking lady including the body. Not sure about the face but it was ok. I didn't get a good look because I was looking away since it can be triggering. Same attractive woman with her friend & boyfriend from Day 7. I guess there they will be there every so often. Maybe even more. Damn she is attractive to look at it.

Apparently, I heard there was another woman but she is married that started showing up. I never saw her for awhile but I heard from the front desk guy telling she is showing up as well. Hmm for some reason I am not attracted to her when I look at her. I don't know why. Her body is pretty nice and somewhat slim but I am not attracted to her.

I have been wondering something about women, do women became less attractive when they MO or have sex? If anyone can answer this. Because I heard one man's point of view, you become less attractive when you release your semen through masturbation & watch porn or during sex. Basically, if a man practice PMO then they become less attractive.

Maybe that is why I might not be attracted to her because her and everyone is releasing their energy (orgasm).

I think I am slowly becoming attractive because of this no PMO journey. I think people especially woman might sense it a little more. But I still need to go on longer to see the effects though.

Seeing SR/NoFap videos on Youtube for inspiration and it is helping me.

Urges, not many with the exception in the end. Upon waking up, I had a dream about woman that I know of. I think it would have became a sexual dream if it went further because I saw myself touching her. Hmm maybe would have been a wet dream. Ironically, no pornographic images in my mind.

Before heading to bed, I came across woman online then suddenly I started to get hard. I became hard for her and I think I would have relapsed if I let it. It might have been enough to do the deed. I think it was due to water in my system. If you notice, if you have enough water in your system you can get horny from that condition. But I went to the bathroom and my hard on subsided but I still want to have sex. I believe it came back though and I went to bed with a hard on.

Nope, I resisted. This is still worth the effort.

I can talk more about this in another time but this is relative in other aspects in life. Not easy and you earn this.

All I have to say is fight! Just my advice when urges come. I will repeat over and over again. I am embracing it when it does happen for me.

Bill comes along the ride with the fellowship. Nice Pony. Keep on Fellowship!

 

43 days

 

Day 15!

 

Checking in Fellowship Friends!

39 Days Free of PMO.

Took it easy yesterday for half of the day, it was nice. Well rested today, ready to tackle another instance of workout/meditation/exposure and reading. Also a few chores to do. I will practice mindfulness in what I undertake.

Have a great weekend !

Stay strong!



@RiseToGreatness Love to see your progress brother, keep at it.

 

Day 34 no PMO.

 

Brother, your stories are very interesting but brother You are in a danger zone . According to your stories , there are lot of women in your local Gym . Please be careful brother...

 

115 day in. Fixing my issues. Not giving up. You know, the usual.

 

Thank you brother, there is nothing you can do. There will always be attractive women in the gym. For me, just at least one attractive woman is present every single time I check in to workout in the none busy hours when barely people are around! That is what I have to deal with now. Only danger is if they start hitting on me if I retain longer. Then this will be difficult. I think I can overcame the temptations when it does happen.

 

day 21 check in - No O
day 3 check in - No P/M

 

Day 37

Making it through yesterday without acting out was nothing short of a miracle. I can not believe I made it through. I don’t know how many times I had hugely powerful images pop into my head. I wanted to pmo so badly 100s of times yesterday. But I did not. I think yesterday was the perfect storm. I was exhausted, I had talked to my abusive father the night before. He did not do anything abusive. But I have noticed being around him or talking to him leads to lots of temptations after. I don’t think I feel safe around him. I did some meditation on my past with him. I think some stuff healed. I don’t really have any positive memories of him as a child. Distance, felt like he did not care and that I was a burden to him. Thank you @Gallade_Templar for reminding me that God delights in me and telling me that story about how much, That really helped. I have also been avoiding doing my orientations for my new job starting mid next week. That is causing stress. I can’t be hard on myself. I worked 14 days straight 12 hour days with 45 minute bus ride each way in the middle of nowhere. A highly stressful job. Making it through yesterday was the hardest thing I ever did. I have done some very difficult things but that one took the cake. Praise God I made it through. I should give myself some credit too. I have worked very hard to get myself to this point, with the help of Gods grace to be able to get through such a trial.

I recently saw a meme about guardian angels cheering when we fight off temptations. I wish I could find it. Haha It was quite funny and I don’t remember it enough to explain it. At the end of the day I pictured all of heaven rooting and cheering for me to get through the temptations on my drive home from a friends place. I am sure God, my guardian angel, my favourite saints, all the angels and saints were cheering so loud when I made it through yesterday. Yesterday was one hell of a battle.

I am doing better this morning it seams. Feeling worn down. Going to go get a nice coffee to treat myself for getting through yesterday. Then I am going to get my stuff done for my new job. Then I am going to read. I think I will start Reading Lord of the Rings!