35 and Older Accountability Group

@artifact
"However mean your life is, meet it and live it; do not shun it and call it hard names." - Henry David Thoreau
I like those quotes man, every time; so thanks!

 

Reset again lads.. stress days

 

I had sex again with my wife yesterday, and it was way waaaaay better than the last time. The last time I still had P images popping up in my mind and I had trouble focussing on the sex. Yesterday however it was just very natural and it felt amazing. This is how it should be. Sex should come unexpectedly and you should not have control over it. That's when it's at its best and healthy.

 

I've been there, and I 100% agree

 

Ooh I really like this approach. It could be very useful as a way to dig oneself out of a hole. When you are at rock bottom, being able to just focus on doing better than last time can seem achievable.

I liked this analogy too. I think the trick is to stop every now again and take a look around, to realise how far you have come. On that note, I'm happy with my 3 weeks and 2 days!

 

you, me and @x_Nocturnalis_x are on the same day.

 

I noticed that. Great to have some company on the journey! I has been over a year since I last made it to 30 days, feeling really positive this time around. I hope you both can make it too.

 

Up to this point I've been just trying to muscle it. I thought I had the will to just stop. I still do. Isn't that crazy? I'm definitely taking your advise and putting a blocker on my laptop. Thanks so much.

 

Day 24. Starting to feel the wave of urges/mindset to reset fading. Should be doable to reach 30 days at this point.

 

Day 0 again. Had a good streak going but I slipped up due lack of sleep, stress and a few beers - Same old story, sigh.

BUT I'm PMO'ing so much less than I used to years ago and I'm motivated to start again and overcome these urges. It's easy to get annoyed with yourself when you slip up, but I'm PMO'ing a few times a month/year compared to DAILY only a year or two back. I should be happy with that all things considering!

Keep up the good fight people

 

Day 25. Checking in.

Workout streak - day 19 (complete)

Felt stable yesterday. Had a few urges but my willpower overpowered the urges. I hope this happens today too.

What I want to write here tomorrow : Day 26.

 

get going again bro! You are a warrior who never accepts defeat.

 

check check day 1

busy with work

 

Amazing how even a "short streak" here is a huge streak compared to old habits or the average Joe.

 

Day 1 checking in. Woke up, meditated and going for a run now. Hopefully get a good streak going again!

 

I get the gist of the video you shared, but it just doesn't hit for me. I kinda feel like my struggles with P&M aren't as intense as some of the other guys in the group. Especially with porn, I never really felt that elated and nothing comparable to blazing blunts for breakfast. I concede I have an addictive personality, but every vice seemed disappointing (barring sleep). I think I finally fully understand that all my addictions are a result of my not addressing mental health issues that I have. This month I've been really good though. I haven't thought about death once. I've been running more consistently and that really helps. I need to dedicate more time to reading and trying to educate myself on organic chemistry and mechanic physics before I start those classes again next semester. I get distracted by this girl I like talking to. A very innocent sweet girl who hardly seems very interested in me, but will still humor my perverse mind from time to time and talk to me most days. I'm pretty sure it's pointless, but I digress.

When I jog I try to keep the same pace. I think of me as one with the universe, an embodiment of Newton's First Law of Motion. It's mental training, and I'm hoping I'll be able to apply to other aspects of my life beyond physical feats. David Goggins' new book is called Never Finished.

You are nearing thirty days, and at least in this space you will be under the sun. And if you can turn 30 into 60 into 90 into .... then you will be surrounded by suns. And with so much sunlight even the darkest tunnel cannot shroud all light. "Be our own light cause the world's so dark."

This approach seems problematic, unhealthy, and unrealistic. Ignoring things does not make them go away.

"So if there's a way out, if there's a way out, if there's a way out then it's not on our own, no no...."

 

Hope all is well with you; you know that video I shared is ground-breaking for me Of course it would mean different things to different people based on their receptiveness and sensitivity. Mind you the addictive-mind is an astute game player (I'm better.. it's not that bad.. I've got bigger problems.. this too shall pass.. etc); being philosophical with addiction is in itself addictive. It's good that you understand that their are mental health issues underlying this; seeking professional, third party support would help. High IQ individuals suffer much more, much deeper, than the average Joe; so please keep that in mind. Death and life are big questions; and your life journey and ultimate goals would surely help give you some sort of a track. Glad running and positive habits are coming into play; distractions however seem to be many and you keep wandering with them all around. Best!

 

Day 26. Checking in.

Workout streak - day 20 (complete)

Progressing slowly. I had a short dirty dream but fortunately I did not ejaculate. I am feeling more energetic due to workout and no PMO. I wish to keep going like this and see what changes happen in my life.