This count as relapse?. I'm really shaking right now...

Did you intentionally seek out erotic stimulation?

 

Reset your counter.

I mean, it’s your recovery, your goals, your parameters, so do what you want. My goal is to establish what I think is a more healthy relationship with sex, which involves not wanting it so damn much so I’d reset. Then I’d think about why I wanted so badly to seek out even the mildest stimulation, and what I could do to set myself up for future success.

A reset isn’t a huge loss. It’s simply acknowledging where you’re at in this journey.

 

Oh, then don’t reset it to today. Reset to count from the day you did it. Geeze, you don’t have to be that hard on yourself.

 

Because it's not about what you experience. It's about how you act on the world. If you intentionally look for erotic stimulation, it's a reset. If you wind up seeing hardcore porn on this site because some troglodyte wants to troll us, it's not a reset. Resets don't happen to us. We choose it, then we turn around and face the consequences.

 

These resets and relapse rules are all artificial ways to reach goals like setting yardages and markers when shooting a 3D course vs the reality of hitting the mark in an actual hunting situation. The yards and inches are just a very useful way to gauge where you are in numbers. So if you had some moment months ago who cares now, you’re obviously doing well now. You could reset your counter to the day, or just forget the whole thing and pretend it didn’t happen and it literally won’t matter either way in the present moment. That’s like saying a month ago I shot three poor shots with poor form, and now I will allow that memory to ruin my day today even though I’ve improved and built a better shot cycle. It is not a beneficial way to think

 

I don’t think there’s hard and fast rules, I think it’s up to you… for me reset is say I released with my wife or say I had a masturbation while half asleep… relapse would be like masturbating to ejaculation while fully awake or full on PMO. But you know some people have more strict standards or whatever

 

Oh don’t let that one instance bother you really you have no idea how many times I’ve stared at a woman’s body in a lustful way or fantasized etc just let it go and move on you’re doing really well!!!

 

People are being too hard on themselves. You don't need to reset over seeking out a woman making some stupid noise. This is nofap and our goal is no porn, masturbating, or orgasms for a set number of days so that you can reset your sexual plasticity and neurons that fire the dopamine in the brain. That's it. You mentioned you got no excitement - excellent. That means you didn't service pleasure and had no "hits" of dopamine. I'm goona chaulk this up to you just wanted to hear some noises. Big deal. Don't reset the counter. Move forward and use this as a lesson not to mess around with stimulating your sexual responses in any way shape or form. Your all good. No reason to stress

 

If you dont mind, I would like to share a little of my experience:

Avoid all possible stuff that would trigger your urge at any cost. Leaving porn is not the ultimate goal. Rebuilding our life it is, and leaving porn is just a stepping stone of it. To achieve this, have to take away from possible trigger and be alert. Don't give up! You can do this

 

@saddist_adult I need to know more about what your goal is before I can help. I rushed in with some assumptions.

 

Like, quit PMO?

But why? What do you think you're going to get out of it?