How to become a man?

Being a "man" is a concept open to interpretation; I think a lot of the stereotypical things that makes someone a man really are not very accurate.

Most of the things you described are "manly" skills but they should not be your primary focus. You are who you are to a large extent, and you wont be as happy or successful trying to be someone your not. For example, being someone who is good at fighting: if you are someone who wants to get in fights and be able to fight well that is a masculine trait. However someone who seeks to resolve conflict and make peace can be just as much of a man, if not more of a man by taking a mature and responsible approach to a situation in a more honorable way than fighting.

Having a good body is great but it is whats on the inside in terms of mentality that makes you a man. However a lot of times having a good body is the bi-product of having the right mentality.

Same thing goes for the ability to fix things or showing physical or emotional toughness. Sure these are stereotypes that may cause you to be percieved to be more manly, but you can be just as much of a man without them. Being sensitive and open and understanding emotionally dosent make you a pussy. Knowing your true self and doing what makes you happy within the patameters of achieving your own success is what makes you a man.

Courage, patience, discipline, as well as a hardened mind and body are part of being a man but love, care, and compassion are also vital attributes. Dont get bogged down in stereotypes and be true to yourself.

In my opinion, to man up, you need to be the guy that knows what to do and be the guy people turn to. Someone who has their shit together and is a role model. You do whats right and have a code of ethics you abide by even if its not always in your best interest. Dont succomb to easiness and go the extra mile. Be educated but dont feel like your too good to get your hands dirty. You have your own identity/expectations for yourself and dont let others define or negatively influence who you are. You are confident but also humble. Thats just my interpretation of being a man though, like I said theres not necessarily a definitive answer.

 

IMO, if you treat everyone nicely specially the women.
You're my ideal type of man.

 

You become more of a man when you do manly things.

 

There is a complete website about manliness. It's called 'the art of manliness'. Check their youtube channel too for a clip that answers exactly your questions. I can't send you the link, because my internet is very limited. But you will find it when you scroll through the channel

 

You already are a man. Fuckit, you are THE Man.
Let no one tell you what a man is, ESPECIALLY not a broad.
Because she has no fucking idea what it's like to be a man and what a man goes through.
Yeah sure treat everyone nicely but don't be a doormat. It's a trap we often fall into by trying to please others.
You define yourself as a man, not anybody else. Work towards your goals and believe in yourself brother.

Can I get an amen!?

 

It's just a figure of speech. Even I have a lot to learn. You'll know when you become a man, and as now, you're on the verge to changing yourself. Everything that you're feeling now will be the opposite (your insecurities, self-esteem, and all that's holding you back). Trust me, you'll know when the time comes.

 

Well-put, sir, very well put. @Tekkadan , being a man is about being happy with who and what you are. If you like to build things, then become skilled at building things. If you like to read, read everything you can get your hands on. If you like to play music, master your instrument. Whether you write poetry and dance ballet or revel in hand-to-hand combat and eating raw meat, find what makes you tick, find your happy. That's being a man.

 

I second this. I got my concept of "being a man" mostly from books. In my view, most of the guys around me act like boys who still want to stroke their ego or else became violent in order to protect it. They acted more like insecure boys rather than mature men.

The way I see it, the biggest tenets to becoming a "true man" (someone who is considered mature) is someone who:

• Knows how to regulate his emotions - He has a good idea of what pushes his buttons and actively tries to find ways to act proactively in those moments or avoid them. First he learned to stop himself from doing destructive things with bad emotions. With experience, he learned to use his emotions productively - to redirect the force of emotions towards his own goals.
• Takes action - yes a man must think, and many do. But unless you DO something with that knowledge, it is basically useless. Men habitually take action on what they know.
• Faces their fears - This, to me, is the most difficult. I'm sure many of us do too. If you don't learn to face your fears, you will not grow emotionally. It's scary, but it's necessary.

 

Becoming a man is something you develop your whole life, similar to working toward a better person. It is an eternal mission. Act kindly, stand by your convictions, talk quietly but carry a big stick, work hard and be dependable, do not lie. In most simple terms be the very best person you can be and constantly improve who you are as a human being and you will find yourself become a Man.

 

That's a great posting you gave.

 

Someone who talks like that is for sure not a "man"

 

As I said, it's not on you to decide whether somebody is or isn't a man, so spare me your sleazy shaming tactics.
BTW, if your next response will be as lame as this one then you can consider yourself ignored.

 

You have no one to blame but yourself.

 

Is that meant to be a complaint? If yes, why did you go into this relationship then?

And how do you see yourself?