Day 15 hardmode share and some questions about it.

My main purpose here is to get an answer to the question: is O'ing to porn (without touching) the same as MO'ing to porn (touching)? My gut says yes but I want some other opinions and viewpoints on the matter. I also want to share my progress.

I'm currently on day 15 of hard mode. Haven't PMO'd for two weeks. I have however dabbled in watching porn very briefly a few times. I get a little bit of a turn on from it but not much. My main challenge is at night when my brain goes straight to past sexual experiences completely arousing me or when I'm dead tired from lack of sleep and I'm susceptible to feelings of "curiosity" of certain types of porn and I start craving it. So far I haven't given in to any of it. Is all this sexual thinking part of the healing process? I've read that any sexual stimulation is bad for the reboot but I can't seem to help where my brain goes. At least I don't MO to it, I suppose.

My main question comes from my experience today of being completely exhausted and craving porn out of curiosity. I was thinking that maybe if I just O to porn without touching it'll be like a wet dream.... but I have a feeling that the dopemine surge to an artificial source is just the same. I appreciate any feedback y'all have!

 

Thanks for your feedback. It sucks how our addicted brains crave dopamine and the ways it tries to convince us to give it. I'll try to avoid fantasizing, it's just so hard. I can't control it.

 

Thank you! I have indeed fallen on this path. That's the only way towards success! I'm stronger now because of it.