1. Welcome to NoFap! We have disabled new forum accounts from being registered for the time being. In the meantime, you can join our weekly accountability groups.
    Dismiss Notice

The myth of beautiful women being approached and complimented all the time - What's the real truth?

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by faplordxd, Jun 24, 2017.

  1. faplordxd

    faplordxd Fapstronaut

    65
    36
    18
    Hello guys,

    First of all, I think the answer to this question is hugely influenced by culture and location, so if you respond, perhaps give some details on this. Also, it's influenced by the girl herself since a flirty, outgoing and friendly girl will attract far more attention than a cold, disinterested one.

    Anyway, I think one of the greatest myths in seduction is that beautiful women gets approached and hit on a lot. What I know to be true is this:

    Beautiful women gets huge amounts of indirect attention.

    By this, I mean that a beautiful woman in a crowded city will get uncomfortable amounts of stares and looks. She might be approached indirectly a lot. And she will no doubt get a lot of attention online. At least if she exposes herself in social media.

    But being approached directly and confidently by a man that's her equal? I think it's very rare. At least in The United States.

    What do I base this on?

    • I've done some day gaming and day time closes and I can tell you that in almost all cases the women are super flattered AND they tell me it's the first time it ever happened to them.

    • In California, I approached this clerk and told her flat out she was beautiful. She was super flattered and happy saying: "Thank you! Thank you. I should get to hear that every day." I was suprised and asked if she didn't hear that often? She told me, "Actually, no. Men aren't like this here." This was an extremely attractive cougar above 40. Exactly how you'd want your wife to look when she gets old. Beautiful dress, great body and smelled like heaven.

    • I spoke with a hot female acquaintance of mine yesterday. She's taken herself, but told me that her girl friends are all really beautiful (I've seen pictures and it's true), but that they never really meet anyone. They also go out a lot. We got into the subject of how I met my girlfriend (direct approach in day game) and her jaw dropped. She told me she would be super charmed if she was approached like that and proceeded to tell me nothing similar had ever happened to her. She's really pretty.
    So, based on my own experiences and what women themselves tell me, beautiful women don't get as much direct attention as you might initially believe. The ridiculous thing is that here in the United States, this even applies to night game. Most guys are afraid of girls even when drunk.

    Obviously, this is sad for these women, but it's a huge opportunity for someone like me and maybe also you to stand out from the crowd.

    Thoughts and experiences?
     
    Spidermonky77 and Hardboiled24 like this.
  2. Tesslynne

    Tesslynne Guest

    It's the same for me in the UK

    I'm a bit like that cougar though lol

    But it's more that on occasion I catch a guy staring at me and then he will look away. I had a guy touch my back and another sit next to me and kept trying to talk to me and a tourist try to follow me around and the caretaker at work keeps trying to ask me out & if I have a boyfriend. In terms of guys I would actually WANT to go out with - nothing. I sometimes get a lot of attention online but it's usually guys begging for sex or nudes even good looking ones but sometimes guys just buddy me and like to have big long conversations.

    But apart from that basically nothing.

    And why the HELL doesn't anyone teach WOMEN "day game" - how to approach men? There is like one dating coach who does but he says other things I don't agree with and it is SO scripted too. Actually he doesn't really teach it it is more like he tells you how to give signals I want to learn to actually APPROACH hot guys in a way that doesn't creep them out but then again if I smile at a guy on the train sometimes he looks TERRIFIED like he thinks I am going to turn into a vampire & suck his blood! Cashiers & barmen flirt but then again that's part of the job, right?

    A lot of guys on here act like ALL women are BOMBARDED by boyfriend options we are NOT. Well I am not. Not over here. When I was younger & lived in my country within 6 months of a breakup I would have a new boyfriend and one of the few guys to approach me these days WAS from my country! Walked up to me in a pub and started talking but it seems rare & my last boyfriend who was younger & I thought he was handsome and cool admitted to usually being very shy & that seems quite the reputation men have here -- offline ones.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 24, 2017
  3. Tesslynne

    Tesslynne Guest

    It kinda hurts when men here insinuate it's easy for us if you only knew how many tears I have cried how many times I thought I will never find love again. And when they say that it makes me think wow I must be so ugly if every woman has this and I don't. Please guys stop saying stop like that most of us singles male OR female DON'T have it easy out there can't we be allies not bitter?
     
  4. Tesslynne

    Tesslynne Guest

    BTW I rarely even see guys here approaching young beautiful women.
     
    faplordxd likes this.
  5. kingpietro

    kingpietro Fapstronaut

    447
    508
    93
    beautiful women don't get as much direct attention as you might initially believe

    direct
    is the key word here. most man aren't direct they are indirect because they are scared of her reaction.

    So they don't have the balls to talk to them and ask them out

    Thats why facebook and social media is a hell for woman they get constantlly messages from guys because in real life they don't have the balls to go to talk to her..

    Olso most guys are indirect and hang around a girl in the hope she will start to like them.

    so if you are saying hey i thinx you are a beautifull lady and i want to out on a date she probablly will say yes because its a sign of confidence something she never experienced

    but if you say you are a beautifull lady with nothing after it she will be like oh another nice guy pussy
     
  6. Tesslynne

    Tesslynne Guest

    Oh please! Women rarely approach men would YOU say yes if a woman asked you out JUST because she asked you out? You'd have to be attracted to her physically & think she seemed like someone you'd enjoy being on a date with so Of course not! But if there were two guys we found equally attractive & interesting & one asked is out one did not? We would say yes to the one who asked and the one who did not would most likely get nowhere
     
  7. Vilcox

    Vilcox Fapstronaut

    94
    25
    18
    I'm always polite to women, but I have since age 14-15 modelled my manner of speaking and my behaviour on a 60 year old male, which used to confuse and even disgust females in my age, whereas older females often complimented on how "well-behaved" I was.
     
  8. Tesslynne

    Tesslynne Guest

    Lol! I just had a guy say to me hi how are you? What are you doing tonight? Shall we go for a drink?"


    But again I'm not even remotely attracted to him.

    But I appreciate the irony of this after this post.
     
    noonoon and faplordxd like this.
  9. Runtilmylegsdropoff

    Runtilmylegsdropoff Fapstronaut

    1,522
    1,750
    143
    Chris rock did a skit on this. Women get offered dick every day.
     
    faplordxd likes this.
  10. faplordxd

    faplordxd Fapstronaut

    65
    36
    18
    Thx for sharing the other side, and yes i know girls get tons of indirect attention online but im mostly talking about direct attention from cold approach

    and i dont think its as common as many believe, and if a girl approached me i wouldnt think that was weird id actually like it but its way less common so id rather just approach the girls im into

    Tesslynne, most guys would love it if you talked to them it would probably be the first time they ever got approached by a girl.

    The way that i do it is if i see someone im into then i walk up to her and say "hey i thought you were cute so i had to say hi" thats what ive had the most success with im sure its even easier for a girl to do that

    Anyways id like to hear other people's thoughts on the matter
     
  11. TheBigBadWolf

    TheBigBadWolf Fapstronaut

    118
    152
    43
    Nice vayne pic btw. That is my go to opener since its not a pickup line and it gives her your reason for approaching right a way in a relaxed and chill way. The truth is a lot of hot girls that are above a 9 on the looks scale, don't get approached a lot by guys. I'm sure they get attention but most of us guys unfortunately don't have a lot of confidence and/or charisma with women. As far as women approaching men, It would be nice and it does happen every once in a while, but in our society it is the masculine thing to make the first move. Women don't want a man who is to nervous to make a move or even talk to her in a flirtatious tone. Especially if they are attractive and they know it.

    So if you are a man who is scared to meet and flirt with a beautiful woman than don't make any more excuses and just go up to her and start a conversation, flirt a bit, and see where it goes from there. If you get rejected it is no biggie, at least you had the courage to approach her when a lot of other guys didn't. Plus you learn something new from each failure, and success.

    -TheBigBadWolf
     
    faplordxd likes this.
  12. PrioritySystem

    PrioritySystem Fapstronaut

    730
    1,870
    123
    Hey wolf, thanks for your reply on my other thread.

    OnTopic: I have experience with 'day-game' (done it myself, it's a lot of fun and works very well in some cases!)
    I actually think it's better to meet new girls than meeting them in a bar. If you speak to a girl in a bar, they ALWAYS think that you want something from them rightaway. They are much more cautious.

    So I have to confirm the message of this post. To anyone reading this thread: I think faplord is right! (don't mention the name, lol)
     
  13. Tesslynne

    Tesslynne Guest

    OK, so what do I do if HE'S a 9? Or if he's just attractive and HE knows it?

    I would like some tips PLEASE!!!

    it's pretty frustrating when all you're allowed to do is stand around and HOPE someone you actually LIKE approaches you! I have wished SO many times I was a guy and this is one of the reasons. :-( At least you CAN approach them, we're basically not allowed to. You get to choose! the WHO. So how are WE supposed to learn something new from each failure and success?
    What SHOULD a (5-7 LOL!) woman DO???
     
  14. TheBigBadWolf

    TheBigBadWolf Fapstronaut

    118
    152
    43
    Like I said it is typically the male who does it and is expected to do it, but you can go up to a guy you like and just start flirting. If he finds you attractive he wont mind you approaching him. I get that society deems sexual women sluts and it isn't as well accepted for a female to approach a male. But only boys believe that it is true. Boys will feel stripped of their man hood and think they are being emasculated. Men will be open to you approaching in a flirty way. Even if you are a 5-7 in looks, As long as we find something about you attractive then we are usually interested in getting to know you. So go up to guys you like if you feel like it and if they get all weirded out then assume they are boys and move on. Good luck!

    -TheBigBadWolf
     
    Tesslynne likes this.
  15. Tesslynne

    Tesslynne Guest

    Great answer & very helpful - thank you so so much !!
     
  16. Truth!!
    Btw, interesting thread!!
     
  17. Freitas.P

    Freitas.P Fapstronaut

    41
    25
    18
    Nice thread.

    Well, I don't consider me a good looking guy (maybe 7) so I approach hot girls by the talking. You know, start talking to them about something that isn't directly about dating. Basically I try to show that I'm a nice guy and then I make a compliment and the move.

    In some cases I took so long to the move and when I did was to late - friendzoned. But I don't see it as a bad thing, at least you have a new friend and she'll tell about you to her female friends.. It's not lost.
     
    faplordxd and Tesslynne like this.
  18. Kenzi

    Kenzi Fapstronaut

    This is a ongoing question of mine, actually.
    If I'm so hot, why did my PA need P?
    but putting my own question aside... I will answer your question :)

    I get all the Wrong kinds of attention.
    I would Never call it direct.
    Cat calling, whistles, the whatnot. (from men and male teenagers)

    I'm in my mid thirties and I'm told I look 15-17.

    Because of this and how Im sure it would effect my childrens mindset (both genders)
    I stay off social media.


    To answer your question, I never get genuine compliments, unless by small children... Who do randomly come up to me...in stores and stuff.
    The last one was from two girls on my daughter's field trip who just had to tell me I was beautiful.
    They ran away giggling.
    The dad behind me said "well, how can you not trust a 7year Olds opinion?"
    Ha!
    Smooth. (-, -)
    But I have no interest in flirting because I'm in a relationship.
    however - If someone ever did try to deliver a compliment, I usually don't take it as a true compliment, as the delivery is so skeezy you can't believe it anyway.
    I felt this way even before my relationship. (you can tell when someone has ulterior motives - at least at my age)

    If you over pour the sugar, then you get dry cookies.
    That's science.

    I live in the US.
     
    Tesslynne and TooMuchTooSoon like this.
  19. The_Monk

    The_Monk Guest

    Its true..beautiful women consider men as their slave and men just consider them as a queen just for fulfilling their lust. Pathetic.
     
  20. Kenzi

    Kenzi Fapstronaut

    When I said "whatnot" I was being polite.

    Here's a downside.
    Men stand so close to me in line that I have to remind them if I can smell their breath that they are Too Close.
    At least twice a summer, I get my a** grabbed.
    In front of my children. (on occasion)
    I am not a piece of meat.
    Men tend to think if they don't talk, or are passing by without me seeing their faces, it's ok.
    Sometimes they are with their partner.
    Sometimes I am with mine.
    Once in a grocery store when I was reaching for my bread a guy grabbed it for me and told me it was because I had great t*ts.
    And asked for my number.

    Beautiful women don't think we are queens.
    I think maybe some are just angry.
    Our bodies are not everyones playground.

    I think P has played a role in the distortion of everyones thinking that casual sexual assault is OK.
    That's why alot of women don't get genuine compliments anymore.
    Or don't consider the "compliments" they do.
    Just my opinion.
     

Share This Page