My Dilemma after 150 days.

almost 150 days of nofap.
i was addicted for 15 years , pmoing 5-6 times everyday.
i used orgasms as escape for life,
if i felt happy - i orgasm
if i felt sad - i orgasm
if i got any good news or sad news - i orgasm

so i used orgasms to sleep, to wake up, so you know how addicted i was and my libido was in the toilet,

i believed completely that i am asexual and just the thought of holding hands with a woman used to make me vomit, i used to laugh at couples and used to think "hahaha, these idiots are so stupid, i am so great, i will go home and fap to porn and will get more enjoyment"

i never realised what i am doing and now 150 days of hard mode nofap,
i am extremely tired right now and in a flatline (i had almost 10 flatlines),
now, i am no longer an asexual, i want to hold hands with women, want to kiss them, cuddle wih them but no sex, maybe my horniness for sex is down because of flatline but atleast i am not asexual and a normal dude who wants kisses and hugs and love.

i am using supplements, nmda antagonists, testosterone boosters, exercising but i think i am at the last milestone where i hope this is the last major flatline after which i will get all engines going and get my libido .

i am extremely tired, fatigue, lathargic,panic attacks, insomnia, no libido, extremely hungry one day and no appetite at all the next day,
these are exactly same symptoms when i hit my first flatline, then i faced almost 10 minor flatlines with no major withdrawal symptomd and now 2nd major flatline with severe withdrawal symptoms,
i hope this is the last flatline i experience, best of luck to you guys ,
nofap really works , my penis has become almost twice thicker and longer (looks like honestly), the days when i am not in flatline aaahhhh!!! i feel i am in heaven i feel libido, full of energy but it doesnt last more than 2 days and i hit flatline again, so i know i am improving alot but the key is hang in these zombie days of flatline, just trust the process,
its like you are getting your puberty all over again, mood swings, fatigue etc, our brain is using all of our physical energy to do the healing,
best of luck guys.

 

Maybe you are not the damaged like i am, i am addicted for 15 years, 5 orgasms everyday, thats alot man,
My sex drive came back like after 60 days but only for 2 days when i felt really horny but it went away in 2 days and i entered another flatline.
I think because there is a HUGE drop in my dopamine levels, my brain takes more time to re-set my baseline dopamine levels. thats why i am taking more time than normal to heal.
And yeah, I jog for 1 hour everyday and do some dumb-bells , weight lifting but at home not at gym, and I eat very healthy with multi vitamins and no junk food at all , no alcohol or smoke.
I have seen that my social anxiety has gone down and I am a bit more calm, overall i am OK but it's libido thats bothering me.
My only libido right now - To hold hands and kiss and cuddle with a woman and no interest in intercourse maybe because i have a dead dick.
But i am waiting for my libido to return.

 

I will if I dont get better in few more months.

 

Yeah i know the damage I did in 15 years cannot be resored in 15 weeks, its just a very long process and i am ready to live like a monk unless i completely heal myself.

 

Yeah i was a super heavy extreme addict so i know i will need much more time to heal.

 

I wish it happens to me too.

 

I have no libido, no motivation to even go and have a piss and you say to go to a party lol,
I just want to lay in bed whole day whole night, im in severe flatline.

 

I read somewhere that supplements specially nmda antagonist (memantine) help in brain plasticity and upregulate dopamine receptors.