Post published by RadiantSoul

I never realized how much I changed until two days ago. I use to be able to grasp any subject easily, understand it the first time it was spoken, maths was super easy, I was smart, confident, mentally strong. getting A's was like drinking water to me.
Now I'm none of that, I have no idea what the professor is talking about 90% of the time, I fight with myself and beg the teacher to bump my grade and get a D- if I'm lucky. Im only a shell of what I use to be.

I never thought those videos and messages in them would affect me, but now 3 years later I believe they do take a toll on your mental health and beliefs. Those messages from the videos have gotten deep into my brain without me realizing it. I have started to act the same way they wanted me to, a weak loser who has no control, and I never even realized it. I have no confidence at all, and I'm always beating myself up. Anxiety is through the roof.

I will come back a month from now and see whether after a month I feel any different, I will focus on all these goals: Meditation 1hour a day (30mins sessions), working out, studying harder, positive affirmations, and reading a book. I will try my best to reboot my brain and learn how to be a strong from the very beginning. Hopefully I will feel a difference, if not ill let you know.
See you on May 17.