Post published by Ekahs

Hey guys.. I've never really introduced myself to the group. I'm kind of new but like 3 weeks. I wont lie to you guys I DIED... I was really trying not too because even though its whatever online, Im continuously dying on the inside. I realize that Im just some stranger you probably care nothing about, the following message I was actually going to post to AP thread but I thought to myself that maybe it'd be best to post in this group. I hate to seem needy. I do not seek pity.. excuse the analogy but I am like a crack addict who is loved and is ashamed whenever he gets high. I just want to be clean. Its been a really hard few months..

The furthest I've gotten so far. I'm looking to get up and really try again but I keep falling.. Im ashamed deeply and feel its time to find others. My goal is to stop with porn and masturbation completely. I was a heavy addict for the ages of 12 to 18 and at 19 was able to break the curse but around October I fell and was unable to recover.. please.. help.. Im dying..
I am religious and have many things I would rather be doing in my life. Most of all I feel I have become Gods biggest regret and disappointment. I repent of course but I shouldn't be doing this.. even at that I've done it so many times I find it difficult to believe he will forgive me. I am stuck. I need help. I came on here to get assistance and I get that Its a two way street but please.. Come to my street cause I don't think I cant limp my sorry no good, suicidal, piece of trash self down two steps without collapsing. or should I say relapsing.. I do not own a Gun but if I did Im sure I would be brave enough to pull it. I say this only cause this has been a reoccurring thought during the time of these falls. The outlook on it is this. I know to some it may seem extreme but to me It only makes sense. If my life truly does have purpose but all I do is fall all the time then I'd probably be best If I were just gone and someone else could make the purpose I was suppose to do accomplished. If his grace is washing over me every time I mess up and because of that I ruin someone else's day, not only do I feel terrible but I think that someone else could be doing my Job 10x better with less a struggle with full trust in him. When I fell in October I fell hard. If theres a christian (preferably) out there that can help me who isn't afraid of me I would really appreciate you or anybody assisting me getting back to the point of being fully out of sin..
todaysresolution more_vert
todaysresolution
God sacrificed Jesus as a blood sacrifice. ALL of your sins were put on Him and His clean blood on you, pleasing God. and Jesus rose
todaysresolution more_vert
todaysresolution
God loves us even though we sin. He promises to forgive all of our sins through Jesus. He cares about you deeply and remembers your sins no more! you are not a failure to God.
todaysresolution more_vert
todaysresolution
He is the One who keeps you. You are not under the Law anymore and not obligated to keep it. Its good to keep it! But you are forgiven no matter what
todaysresolution more_vert
todaysresolution
God wants to help you with your addiction. Sometimes even when we ask His timing is different than what we expect
Ekahs more_vert
Ekahs
I see why you guys posted short now -.- but -
Ekahs more_vert
Ekahs
I read anything spoken against the holy ghost is sin and will not be pardoned
Ekahs more_vert
Ekahs
Therefore if I were to hold onto this sin I believe I'd be going to hell so I feel in danger even if I say sorry. because I came back to it..
todaysresolution more_vert
todaysresolution
how are you feeling today mats
todaysresolution more_vert
todaysresolution
speaking against the Holy Spirit is rejecting Jesus as your Savior
todaysresolution more_vert
todaysresolution
pmoing has nothing to do with speaking against the Holy Spirit. the reason its unpardonable is that the Holy Spirit is the one who knocks at your door to help you accept Jesus and if you
todaysresolution more_vert
todaysresolution
if you permanently ignore Him and decide not to then Jesus gift isnt given to you. Jesus died for the worlds sins but you have to accept or else you arent forgiven
todaysresolution more_vert
todaysresolution
all who the Father gives to Jesus come to Him and the one who comes to Him He will certainly not cast out. Youve come to Jesus.
todaysresolution more_vert
todaysresolution
you have been sealed with the Holy Spirit once you believed as a promise of your inheritance. You can not be lost. Jesus is a good shepherd who keeps His sheep
todaysresolution more_vert
todaysresolution
no one can snatch you out of God's hand. no one can say Jesus is Lord without the Holy Spirit in them
todaysresolution more_vert
todaysresolution
nothing can separate you from the love of God through Jesus. You are a new creation born again into Jesus with eternal life. You cant be unborn and uneternal.
Ekahs more_vert
Ekahs
I got that, makes sense, doing pretty decent today thanks
Ekahs more_vert
Ekahs
The thing is that when I was going to church there were many wolves in sheep clothing and they said they've came to jesus
Ekahs more_vert
Ekahs
thats a huge thing that bothers me. I just don't him thinking Im a phony like they are.
Ekahs more_vert
Ekahs
Big words I know. I have gift to detect spirits and I can hear the evil they speak.. what about them?