Post published by SamsonDavid

Good morning.
Today I'm starting anew at day zero. I gave in to temptation to search for porn (by trying to circumvent the filters on my computer and smartphone), and to masturbate a few times these past few days.
Mainly I was searching for some excitement in the midst of great fatigue (but of course the porn only made it worse).
Also I have a complicated issue going on with a 'friend'. Something sexual happened between us a year ago. I felt so guilty afterwards that I told him I never want to do it again. We've kept in touch although I'm not happy about our friendship. The situation needs closure and that's what I'm about to have in a couple of weeks.
I just wanted to share this briefly to mark the start of my new run. I feel pretty desperate about failing the LORD so many times. I feel trapped. But I have cried to the LORD Jesus to deliver me and I know He won't let me down.
And this goes for all of us. Thank you for reading this, thank you for commenting my previous posts #Togetherwecan and #JohnBaur; I will be in touch with you soon.
FreedomFromSlavery more_vert
FreedomFromSlavery
Don't give up hope! Come hope to Christ and let Him rebuild your spirit. :)
John Baur likes this.
SamsonDavid more_vert
SamsonDavid
Made it through the first 24 hours. From this afternoon on, I've been feeling much better. I also took a long walk from the train station to the place where my car was parked (3 miles further). That felt good.
SamsonDavid more_vert
SamsonDavid
Made it through the next 24 hours. Feeling a lot better than 2 days before. Got a lot of work done today. Tired now, going to sleep early. :)
Tolulope 009 likes this.
SamsonDavid more_vert
SamsonDavid
Hurray, another 24 hrs with no PMO! By chance I noticed a problem in my app filter. Will contact Covenant Eyes helpdesk tomorrow if problem persist.
SamsonDavid more_vert
SamsonDavid
And another 24 hrs PMO-free! Had a very stressful day, and for a few times felt tempted to touch myself. It didn't happen though. Going to sleep now. PS feel excited to get to know some of the other forum members better.
SamsonDavid more_vert
SamsonDavid
Unfortunately I masturbated this afternoon. Have to start at zero again. Glad there was no porn or fantasy involved.
SamsonDavid more_vert
SamsonDavid
Relapsed. Watched porn 2 times yesterday. I feel sad.
God'sPower more_vert
God'sPower
Never give up bro. Continue to claim ur identity in christ, this is a faith walk...u r delivered already