Post published by faxmaddick

I just relapsed and have literally no motivation to keep going, but I'm terrified of my brain and porn and what's going on with me. I've been trying to quit for about a year and shit just keeps getting worse. I'm absolutely terrified of what this escalation is doing to my brain. What if I wind up actually castrating myself? What if I start watching illegal porn? I feel like I'll never recover from PIED and it won't even be worth it. After 6 months away from porn I felt terrible. I just keep screwing up and the scariest part is I don't care. Porn is making me apathetic about everything. I'm throwing away my relationship with my family and my education, and I'm scaring myself. Yet, I can't seem to stop. I feel the need to do something dramatic.
SLAA1 and Deleted Account like this.
Mckell more_vert
Mckell
Hate to hear you’re struggling right now. If you can, give it a couple of minutes, then give it a couple hours then a day to see if things calm down. Lots of stuff goes on in life in addition to your struggle with porn. How bad is the other stuff weighing on you? Don’t hesitate to get support and help for those things too. Please don’t get discouraged and give up/give in. You’re young and you’ve already made the incredibly self aware decision to try to do something about your porn addiction. It may seem like we’re just random strangers here, but it’s a safe place and we can offer real support
Puppy more_vert
Puppy
Oh Boi. Sometimes I think just don't fap and no porn isn't enough. There must be a change from your inner soul you know.
darknight more_vert
darknight
It gets better. Temporarily burn your bridges to technology. I left my phone in my car for 40 days. Helped tremendously.
Saint Augustine likes this.