Myfortress
Last Activity:
Feb 24, 2024
Joined:
Nov 1, 2018
Messages:
824
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Trophy Points:
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Gender:
Male
Birthday:
Oct 3, 1967 (Age: 57)

Myfortress

Fapstronaut, Male, 57

NoFap Defender

4 months Jan 1, 2019

Myfortress was last seen:
Feb 24, 2024
    1. Vampire Hunter D
      Vampire Hunter D
      Thank you I am a virgin so I know recovery will be hard hopefully I have the willpower
    2. Vampire Hunter D
      Vampire Hunter D
      hello i am a 19 trying to heal from pied any advice
      1. Myfortress
        Myfortress
        Yes, full reboot hard mode no porn, masturbation, or sex. You also have to work on your mind. You have to shut down the fantasizing and all visual stimuli. Your have to exercise self control.
        Mar 14, 2023
      2. Myfortress
        Myfortress
        There are many resources on this site. The book, your brain on porn, is good and if you are spiritual, tapping into a higher power is important. For me this is Jesus Christ and his radical forgiveness and desire to see me healed. You can do this. It will not be easy. But it is worth it when you regain control of your life and you can enjoy intimacy with a woman again as was intended.
        Mar 14, 2023
        Vampire Hunter D likes this.
    3. vasonuevo
      vasonuevo
      hola alguien sabe me podra ayudar
    4. judson
      judson
      Hi I am looking for a accountability partner
    5. Dev47b
      Dev47b
      Hi. I am looking for AP
      1. Myfortress
        Myfortress
        I am a rookie but I am happy to do it.
        Feb 27, 2019
      2. Myfortress
        Myfortress
        Want to use telegram? My name is the same there.
        Feb 27, 2019
      3. vasonuevo
        vasonuevo
        como estas en telegram
        Mar 23, 2021
    6. Myfortress
      Myfortress
      4 months
      1. Agent, Win_for_life, Toni7 and 9 others like this.
      2. ArsenalAffliction
        ArsenalAffliction
        Yeeethhhh
        Jan 9, 2019
        Agent, Win_for_life and Myfortress like this.
    7. Deleted Account
    8. idekbro
      idekbro
      How does this work?
      1. liberto and Win_for_life like this.
      2. View previous comments...
      3. vasonuevo
        vasonuevo
        como me anexo al grupo
        Mar 23, 2021
        Myfortress likes this.
      4. Myfortress
        Myfortress
        You go there the Christian group page and ask to join.
        Mar 23, 2021
      5. Myfortress
        Myfortress
        There are lots of helpful and encouraging people in the Christian group. Sorry I only come here morning and evening.
        Mar 23, 2021
    9. Myfortress
      Myfortress
      90 days and not looking back
    10. Myfortress
      Myfortress
      60 days and counting
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  • About

    Gender:
    Male
    Birthday:
    Oct 3, 1967 (Age: 57)
    Journal Thread Link:
    View my Journal
    I was an angry, bitter, selfish, know-it-all, womanizer who was hooked on pornography, for decades. I also used alcohol and drugs, sometimes in excess.

    Angry that everything did not go perfectly. Angry at the way my life turned out. I could not celebrate other people’s successes. I did not have any real friendships. I was secluded.

    I became very selfish, I was only concerned with myself and what others could do for me. I never thought of others.

    I did not listen when others tried to help me make good decisions. I did not listen when people were trying to give me good advice/constructive criticism. I took it all like criticism aimed at making me feel bad. This was how I criticized others, to make them feel bad. I did not understand that people who cared about me wanted to help me improve and not make the same mistakes they had. So I resisted the good advice and made some horrible decisions. I suffered the consequences, and learned that way, from the school of hard knocks. It is only by God’s grace that I did not die.

    I started looking at pornographic magazines from the age of about 7 yrs. old. As a teenager, I began masturbating. Before long I had a willing girlfriend. We had sex all of the time. There were two long term ones and several short term ones. There was a failed marriage and a son. After this divorce I was depressed for years.

    Then I found Christ and a new bride all at the same time. I realized one day, after I got married that I was trapped in a prison. A slave to my sin. I felt like I could never get out. I was being bombarded with images, movies and videos, live women that fueled a fantasy. I was letting my fantasy life rule my actions. There were all of these triggers that led me into the temptation. It could be an image, advertisement, sound… I had no self-control, no restraint. Pleasure was my god, my idol. This was a stronghold that I did not want God to destroy. I was being unfaithful to my husband, Christ. Cheating on God. Flirting with Christ, and grieving the Holy Spirit. I thought women existed to fulfill all of my fantasies. I got married and expected this from my wife. So the pornography and masturbation continued whenever she would not fulfill my selfish desire.

    I found hope in the one who invented sex, God. A personal relationship with him started me on the road out of bondage and on to freedom. The fantasy world that I created was a lie, created by the enemy that robbed me of healthy relationships with women and most importantly, God. With the help of God, and his unlimited grace, I am gradually re-programming my mind and breaking out of the prison I was in, not to mention the consequences that accompany it.

    I realize now that all of the symptoms above: bitterness, anger, shame, a critical spirit, hardheadedness, selfishness, and a lack of close friends were a byproduct of my decades of immorality. Since I came to Christ 17 years ago it has been an uphill battle to get my life back. It has been a long painful journey with Christ. I fell back into porn probably hundreds of times. Within the last couple of years my intimacy with Christ has improved significantly. I finally realized that the depth of his grace and forgiveness will never run out, no matter how many times I fall. The closer I got to Jesus the less I wanted the porn. The more I realized the effect on my personality, family and quality of life the less I want to go back. Now I am past the two month mark on abstaining and my goal is to never go back. Does that rule out a relapse, no but the more I draw near to the Lord the more I feel like I will not go back. I am looking forward to my next goal of enjoying my relationship with my savior and my wife!

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