Pain_is_gain

I only started on a genuine self improvement journey recently i am starting to see what were massive blocks in my life are simply nothing but myself.Why cant i get instagram,Snapchat?

Apparently i keep blaming myself for the fact i was fat and ugly in my starting years.Ever since then i have been playing basketball and exercising working out at gym with freinds who truly motivate me unlike the ones who i used to be freinds with back then,just on my phone all the day giggling at memes.I got to know a whole lot more.But never got to experience much because hearing how everyone's getting ig ,snap and girls and me i have just been fapping .I have been losing myself in fact at times i wanted to go back to being simple chubby me where I would have a thick skin not caring about what society thinks of me.I am not sure what is right and wrong but the fact i dont feel sad when i see those charities on tv makes me think that all the adults who dont donate to charity must be sorta like me.Being numb due to excessive fapping.