+TenPercent

I really need to get these stray thoughts under control!
It's unlikely, but I focus on that slight (1%) chance that she's being unfaithful.
My addict attaches to those thoughts. It's extremely arousing. Ugh. Reality would be so much different, but too much focus could manifest such a painful outcome.

he who worries suffers twice ,

aw, hehe, I hope time goes by fast until you do see her again..maybe this is time for recollection..
idk. try not to let these bad feelings keep bothering you. maybe you could hang out with someone else and you can still text her :) you can get through this..next time you see her will be extra sweetened from the time apart.

@Coffee Candy I think (or want to think) that you are right on all counts.
She has a challenging week at work and wants to really focus . . . and she seems to really adore me, so I'm 99% sure that it's really not about me.
It's that nagging 1% of doubt that I need to not focus on or I will get super aroused! :O
Day 6 without an O. You are right, Coffee. I might really need this time to reflect. And not have sex ;-)

However, since we agreed not to have sex right away, the first weeks were REALLY challenging!
I think it's easier to not M when you are single and not looking at P than it is to not M while you are falling in love and very much desiring to connect physically.

And now I am finding that having an orgasm during sex is still similar in some ways to having an orgasm from M. The hormonal and neurochemical changes are mostly the same.
So now I "feel like" I masturbated 5 days ago when I have not done that for 175 days and have not had sex with my hand for almost two years.

So, @Zeeshaan I would suggest that the more time you spend off of porn and masturbation the better!

I'm concluding that my biggest enemy is orgasm.
Had 4 in 8 days with my gf. The first two (after ~160 days no PMO) were phenomenal but the last two were unnecessary. Gratuitous (?) Better in some ways, yet not much different than "getting off" by myself.
I feel like I'm in single digits. So much sexual desire and weak resolve to resist.

Followed some advice and took a cold shower. Feeling better.
I also feel like sleeping, but I should go to a 12 step meeting tonight.
I need to remember that I am only 5 days post-O and still in the chaser. Dangerous curves ahead!

Sorry about it..I hope you'll have better days soon..have a nice show and popcorn time. You deserve better days and good snax.

@Coffee Candy - thank you! The show was pretty good and the popcorn (LOTS of butter) really hit the spot!
I actually felt calm and content just three hours later when my gf came over. Hard to believe after such a crap day!

Nice. Lots of butter sounds delish.
Way to go on making it a good day.

It's hard to describe . . . yet not. Hard to do in practice and not lose oneself in the pursuit of orgasm for either self or partner.
It is non-orgasmic sex. It's slow and gentle. Lots of eye contact. Takes practice (but lucky for me she has experience with this)
I would recommend reading Cupid's Poisoned Arrow . . .

Thank you for your suggestion. I will look into it and see if that is the path for me when I get older.

I can feel you.
I had tantric full body orgasm two times on two separate days
I felt thirsty,hungry as hell, and it was Out Of The World experience.more power to you.

So far I'm still porn free (hooray!!)
Edging is tricky. Fantasy is even trickier.
Tried to lay off of the caffeine AND sugar today. That gave me an awful headache. So far I've had some success with moderating sugar, less success staying off of caffeine.

Still working on minimal caffeine and sugar? me too man. Wanna pact together to work on that shit? I am cutting out all caffeine and all pastries / desserts

gf is an advantage.

Tough but look at it this way you may have been tortured all night and tempted ,BUT YOU WERE NOT BEATIN YOUR STILL IN AND IN THE FIGHT that's a big win in my book

You can pull throuughhh :)

Thank you @Tiger uppercut! @cleanliving81 @Coffee Candy for the support! :)

I'm hanging in there. Today was rough at first but I got some really exciting work news. That's just one more feeling (excitement) which can get me in trouble, but I'll be seeing my gf soon and I will be in good hands if I'm with her. If I can just NOT OD on sugar and caffeine now . . .

Nice! What did you do that was relieving? What did you eat..I also need to know that..for scientific purposes :b

Your mentality is killer! Very well done on another day of progress. :+)

@Coffee Candy - being in the company of other people is huge, especially if I am interacting with them and getting out of my own head. Recovery people help me to focus on solutions that really work. :)

As for the food, I had French country stew. That was probably a good choice. (comfort food).

But . . . I gave in at the end and had a little dessert. And . . . I bought a chocolate croissant. Oops. Ate half of it when I got home and immediately felt a rush of sexual energy. Not good!! Sugar and simple carbs are recipe for disaster for me.

That is kinda what I'm afraid of once I finally get laid

I had three orgasms in less than a week with my girlfriend and it felt oh-so-right when it happened.
Heck, I still think it was the right thing to do.
But the wolves have been awoken and all of my urges are back!!

be careful of the chaser effect bro

I am impressed that you had sex without an orgasm. That must have been difficult to achieve.

@aspiringwriter1997 - oddly, in some ways, it wasn't difficult to achieve. I had a history of DE (delayed ejaculation) when I was engaged in excessive masturbation (de-sensitization) and in the past I would not expect to orgasm.
But . . . the whole experience was a little underwhelming and my not having an O isn't always the easiest thing for my partner to feel comfortable with.