Recent content by Warrior and seeker of TRUTH

How quickly the tides can change. Last Monday we celebrated our anniversary. Gave it space to allow the day to be what it needs to be. It actually was a fabulous day. Connecting, having fun, and hope for the future. Talking about normal things like getting into a new hobby like paddleboaring...

Just got back from a trip to the ocean. I almost didn't go, but ended up talking and just being heard made all the difference for me. We also had a counseling session right before leaving. I felt ok about the session. Now, the whole family looks forward to this trip every year. In a lot of ways...

I'm not doing well lately, and this is where I am at. Very lost. Safety and Trust. It doesn’t exist. I am in almost constant pain, and he doesn’t realize how much the coldness and continued lack of care penetrates my already bleeding heart. My cherished life is shattered all around, and he...

Bleeding out

The heart

All of what you said resonates with me, and we have cycled around this particular issue pretty much since he moved back in. There is this stepping on toes with each other's recovery needs and wants, and what it takes to restore the relationship. It hurts. It is confusing. Boundaries/his...

How do you work through triggers? How about a time of the day that is hard? After D day, everything in life was a trigger. Driving down the road, getting a cup of coffee, you name it. It is soooo much better now. There are some triggers that are still a big struggle. Has anyone ever struggled...

My heart goes out to you! Reading your posts, I hear the genuine love and desire. I hear the pain, the hope, the courage. My story comes from a foundation of faith in God, and going though all this has caused a lot of confusion and even more pain. I went into marriage with my 'Christian' husband...

I appreciate your thoughts. When things get really difficult like they have in the last month, or even just a few hard days, I can get so polarized and hopeless about life in general. It is a state that I know there is very little clear thinking. It is a hard feeling to pull out of especially...

You are not alone. Triggers are totally like pulling the trigger that sets off a chain reaction of memories. A fear/pain response. It does get better over time. I remember at first it was like my whole world and memories turned gray with bombs going off all around me. That's what it was like...

Learning a new dance

Couples recovery, his recovery, my recovery. How? Triggers, safety, trust building Learning a new dance In trying to heal, build trust, and work on our recoveries, we have been not doing well coming together on this. At least not in the last month. Stepping on toes a lot. I woke up this morning...

I relate to both of the above descriptions describing what a trigger feels like physically. My heart starts pounding, and I feel like I'm going to crawl out of my skin. I too, start to flood with thoughts and emotions that can escalate into turning into this angry on edge person. I usually go...

Yes. No easy decision for sure. There is a time frame in my mind of 5 years (with boundaries, and intense recovery). If we are not having more good days than bad, a lot of healing, and living in a more thriving marriage then no more. Not good for anyone or the kids. Absolutely no right or wrong...

Many days I don't think I'm "doing it" because it has been such a roller-coaster. Some days are really hard and filled with hopelessness, and grief. It is life shattering, and I think for me, I have stayed for several reasons: In the beginning it was about not making any decision until I...